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Speaker 1: Good, our gang. I hope you're bloody terrific. So this

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Speaker 1: is this is something that I talk about a lot,

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Speaker 1: and I've spoken about a lot over the years, is

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Speaker 1: the fact that you and I can be in the

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Speaker 1: same conversation but not having the same experience. We can

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Speaker 1: be looking at exactly the same thing and we both

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Speaker 1: see something different. We hear a word, it means something

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Speaker 1: to me, it means something different to you. And that's

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Speaker 1: because there are things that happened to us around us,

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Speaker 1: because of us, in spite of us, events, situation, circumstances

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Speaker 1: that happen in our external, physical, three dimensional world. And

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Speaker 1: then you and me we see that, we experience that,

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Speaker 1: we hear it, we feel it, we touch it, we whatever,

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Speaker 1: and then we give it meaning. And we give it

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Speaker 1: meaning based on what we think or what we believe,

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Speaker 1: or what we know or more accurately, what we think

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Speaker 1: we know, our feelings, our opinions, our biases, our previous experiences,

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Speaker 1: our history, our education, our inclination, the stuff that we're

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Speaker 1: scared of, the stuff we're inspired by. All of these

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Speaker 1: things are variables, cognitive and emotional and experiential variables which

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Speaker 1: influence the way that you and I see stuff, and

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Speaker 1: the way that you and I see stuff or interpret

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Speaker 1: stuff is a subjective thing, which is why something happens

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Speaker 1: in front of you and me and you have a

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Speaker 1: different story about the thing because you're not me. Your

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Speaker 1: mind is not my mind. Your brain works differently to mine.

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Speaker 1: You've been programmed and educated and influenced and poked and

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Speaker 1: products cognitively and emotionally and sociologically over the course of

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Speaker 1: your life in one way. I've been influenced in another way,

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Speaker 1: And so we're looking at the same thing, but we're

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Speaker 1: not seeing the same thing because Craig's version of the

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Speaker 1: world is subjective. So in a way, I coexist in

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Speaker 1: the world and Craig's world my version of the world,

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Speaker 1: and I think problems happen when we mistake our version

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Speaker 1: of the world for the world. We mistake our subjective

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Speaker 1: interpretation for a global, objective truth, and then we get

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Speaker 1: very defiant about that. So what I'm talking about today is,

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Speaker 1: you know, I'm not an expert in this, but I

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Speaker 1: think I have a pretty good grasp of it. So

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Speaker 1: if you can bear with me, this is not scripted clearly,

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Speaker 1: and there's only me and I'm sitting by myself thinking

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Speaker 1: out loud, and so trying to explore this idea of

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Speaker 1: the impossibility of objectivity, or that our capacity we have

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Speaker 1: to be somewhere in the ballpark of objective. I'm kind

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Speaker 1: of thinking out loud as I go, so in advance.

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Speaker 1: I apologize for my clumsiness and perhaps for the lack

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Speaker 1: of inspiration or flow, but I just think this is

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Speaker 1: a I genuinely think this is a really fucking important

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Speaker 1: concept for people to grasp because I think so many

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Speaker 1: people spend their life looking at things through a certain

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Speaker 1: lens without realizing they even have a fucking lens. They

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Speaker 1: just think that what they think is what is You know,

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Speaker 1: so that ain't true. That ain't true, And sometimes your

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Speaker 1: version of events will align with actual events, or sometimes

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Speaker 1: the way that you see something is consensual amongst among

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Speaker 1: a group, right, so you might be somewhere close to

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Speaker 1: being accurate in the way that it's seen more globally.

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Speaker 1: And there'll be times where you're completely inaccurate, wildly off track,

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Speaker 1: as am I. We all will be. But so let's

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Speaker 1: start with identifying or explaining what objectivity is. So objectivity

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Speaker 1: is it is the ability to observe, assess, or respond

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Speaker 1: to something without being influenced by your personal feelings, your opinions,

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Speaker 1: your background, your bias is, your wants, likes, needs, experiences,

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Speaker 1: and even your genetics. It's about seeing things as they

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Speaker 1: are versus how you want them to be or fear

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Speaker 1: them to be, or how you have can conditioned being

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Speaker 1: conditioned to believe they are. And this is the same

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Speaker 1: for me. This is you, this is me, this is everyone.

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Speaker 1: And so in Layman's terms, we might say that objectivity

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Speaker 1: is that mythical unicorn where you kind of magically separate

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Speaker 1: yourself from your ego, your beliefs, your baggage, culture, hormones, genetics,

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Speaker 1: your morning mood and just see something as it is. Well,

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Speaker 1: good luck with that. Because I don't know that any

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Speaker 1: of us do that. I will say I think there

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Speaker 1: are things that, of course, we can be more objective

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Speaker 1: about than others because we perhaps don't have any pre

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Speaker 1: existing thoughts, ideas, beliefs, or understanding of a certain thing.

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Speaker 1: So when someone says to me, for example, hey Craig,

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Speaker 1: I want to teach you the best way to build

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Speaker 1: a tree house for your nephew that I don't have,

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Speaker 1: I want to teach you. I want to so I

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Speaker 1: don't have any I don't have an idea of how

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Speaker 1: to do that, Like I don't have a pre existing concept.

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Speaker 1: I have no fucking idea, no theories, I have no understanding.

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Speaker 1: That's never been of interest to me. So when old

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Speaker 1: mate says to me, let me tell you how to

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Speaker 1: build a tree house, this is the best way to

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Speaker 1: do it, I'm probably going to be way more open minded, neutral,

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Speaker 1: objective than if they say to me, Hey, Craig, I

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Speaker 1: want to talk to you about how to get in shape.

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Speaker 1: I want to tell you about the best way to train,

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Speaker 1: the best way to work out, the best things to

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Speaker 1: do in a gym. Well, good luck with that, because

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Speaker 1: I got all my own fucking thoughts, I got all

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Speaker 1: my own baggage, I've got all my own experiences, I've

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Speaker 1: got all my pre existing stuff, And good luck trying

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Speaker 1: to teach me, because I fucking know everything. Wink wink

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Speaker 1: with me. So I think that depending on the conversation,

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Speaker 1: depending on the topic or the issue, I think we

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Speaker 1: can be more or less objective. But also keeping in

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Speaker 1: mind that even when old mate is teaching me about

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Speaker 1: how to build a tree house, it's still me. It's

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Speaker 1: still it's still me looking through the Craig lens. The

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Speaker 1: fact that I've never thought about building a treehouse, or

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Speaker 1: I've never built one, doesn't mean that my emotional stuff

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Speaker 1: or psychological stuff, or my hesitation to do anything that

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Speaker 1: resembles handyman work, or my underlying belief that I'm fucking

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Speaker 1: useless with tools, or all of those things, they're going

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Speaker 1: to influence that. Even though I've never thought about building

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Speaker 1: a treehouse, there's going to be stuff there which will

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Speaker 1: make me more or less objective and open minded. Right,

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Speaker 1: And we love to see ourselves as being open minded.

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Speaker 1: We like it because it's like it's culturally and socially

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Speaker 1: seen as a noble trait or characteristic. It's like it's

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Speaker 1: a desirable thing. He's so she's so open minded, so objective,

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Speaker 1: so easy going, you know, like not prejudiced, not biased,

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Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah blah. And it's it's a good feeling,

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Speaker 1: because who the fuck wants to be seen as being

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Speaker 1: closed minded? Who doesn't want to be objective? Who wants

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Speaker 1: to be shut down emotionally and mentally, and who wants

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Speaker 1: to be locked into a certain way of thinking and being? Well,

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Speaker 1: we say we don't. We say we don't want that,

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Speaker 1: but fucking he fuck Batman. Have a look around how

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Speaker 1: many people, including me and you. At times, I'm sure

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Speaker 1: that's what we are. I think we're way more closed

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Speaker 1: minded about many things than we are open minded or objective.

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Speaker 1: We are very very very much intertwined, intertwined with our

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Speaker 1: subjective story that we created because we are identified with

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Speaker 1: that story. That story makes me feel like I know,

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Speaker 1: and I like knowing. I don't like not knowing. Also

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Speaker 1: that subjective story that I have about that objective thing

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Speaker 1: that gives me a level of comfort and familiarity and certainty.

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Speaker 1: And I like all of those things. And what I

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Speaker 1: don't like is one I don't like someone knowing when

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Speaker 1: I don't know, and then they challenge my thoughts. Right,

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Speaker 1: So I'm not going to fuck and listen to them.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to stay in the echo chamber. I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: I'm going to get trapped in this thing called confirmation bias,

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Speaker 1: where I only listen to people who agree with me,

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Speaker 1: or think like me, or are in my thought cult

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Speaker 1: because that's where I feel safe. That's where I'm around

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Speaker 1: people and ideas that are familiar to me, and I love, familiarity, right,

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Speaker 1: and this is this is a very very very common thing.

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Speaker 1: Like we we tend not to realize in the moment

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Speaker 1: that we what we call our truth our knowledge is

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Speaker 1: really just or what we call I should say truth

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Speaker 1: or knowledge is really just our our truth and knowledge.

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Speaker 1: And sometimes you know, maybe we're right, maybe we're right

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Speaker 1: a lot, maybe you're right a lot. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: But also, guess what you're not right? Sometimes guess what

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Speaker 1: you're wrong. Guess what not because you're bad or weird

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Speaker 1: or flawed or evil. But you've been wrong about a

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Speaker 1: lot of things. And the reason I know this is

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Speaker 1: because you're a human. I've been wrong about probably as

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Speaker 1: many things as I've been right. And the older that

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Speaker 1: I get, the less certain I get, and the more

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Speaker 1: open I am to acknowledging that I'm getting things wrong.

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Speaker 1: Every day, I'm trying, I'm learning, I'm doing what I can,

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Speaker 1: but I have to acknowledge my flaws and my humanity,

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Speaker 1: and I have to realize that no, this is not

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Speaker 1: this is not a universal truth. This is my version,

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Speaker 1: This is my understanding, This is my story, This is

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Speaker 1: my interpretation of something that is much bigger than me,

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Speaker 1: and even when we even when we try to be neutral, Like,

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Speaker 1: the thing is that you wherever you are, there are

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Speaker 1: your beliefs. Wherever you are, there are your biases. That's

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Speaker 1: wherever you are, there's your upbringing, your family, the echoes

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Speaker 1: of decades of conversations, the imprint, the psychological, emotional, sociological

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Speaker 1: imprint of your dad's thinking and your mum's thinking, and

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Speaker 1: the trauma and the joy and the hopes and the

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Speaker 1: culture and the education and the religion, all of that

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Speaker 1: shit that's just been programmed into you. You can't leave

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Speaker 1: that behind like you take it everywhere with you. And again,

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Speaker 1: this is not good or bad. This is something to

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Speaker 1: be aware of. This is something to be cognizant of,

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Speaker 1: which is why I'm really comfortable to say to people, Look,

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Speaker 1: this is what I think about. You know. In fact,

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Speaker 1: I had a meeting. This not a meeting. I had

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Speaker 1: a coffee this morning. I'm recording this on a Saturday

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Speaker 1: with Tommy, and Tommy and I were talking about God,

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Speaker 1: as we did briefly the other day Tommy Jacket, and

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Speaker 1: not for a long time, but just for a moment,

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Speaker 1: and I said, you know, basically, we got to the

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Speaker 1: point where we're talking about what we believe. And I said, well,

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Speaker 1: this is what I believe. But also I believe that

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Speaker 1: because in part that's familiar to me, in part I'm

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Speaker 1: comfortable with that, in part I was programmed this way.

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Speaker 1: There are some things that I don't align with or

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Speaker 1: don't think anymore, but there's a lot that I do. Now.

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Speaker 1: If I am being somewhere in the ballpark of objective,

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Speaker 1: I need to say, this is just Craig's version, This

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Speaker 1: is my story, this is my understanding. This is my

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Speaker 1: subjective interpretation of something way fucking bigger than me that

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Speaker 1: I'll probably never understand. And if I'm being a little

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Speaker 1: bit humble and aware and real and raw, I have

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Speaker 1: to say I could be wrong. I could be wrong

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Speaker 1: about some of it, a bit of it, a lot

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Speaker 1: of it, or none of it. But I'm definitely not

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Speaker 1: wrong about none of it. There's definitely a shit that

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Speaker 1: I'm getting wrong on a daily basis, and that's okay.

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Speaker 1: And I think the moment that we recognize that we

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Speaker 1: don't see things as they are, see things as we are,

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Speaker 1: Thanks and as Nint who said, we don't see things

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Speaker 1: as they are, we see things as we are, the

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Speaker 1: moment that we realize that the moment that we go ah,

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Speaker 1: this is just me looking at the world through the

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Speaker 1: Craig window. This is me looking through this lens. This

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Speaker 1: is me looking at this through my understanding on my vocabulary,

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Speaker 1: or the lens of my education, or the lens of

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Speaker 1: my self limiting beliefs, or whatever the fucking lens is.

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Speaker 1: This is just me seeing that thing. Whatever, that stimulus

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Speaker 1: over there, that event, that circumstance, that's human, those words,

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Speaker 1: whatever it is. That's just my interpretation of a thing.

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Speaker 1: And the moment that we realize this is not the thing,

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Speaker 1: this is my version of the thing, then I believe

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Speaker 1: we actually move closer towards a level of or a

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Speaker 1: greater degree perhaps of openness, objectivity, and perhaps neutrality where

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Speaker 1: we're not pulled one way or the other so much

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Speaker 1: by our bias, you know, like confirmation bias is our

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Speaker 1: brain's favorite shortcut. Like we unconsciously and all humans do this.

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Speaker 1: We unconsciously seek out the stuff that confirms what we believe,

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Speaker 1: what we think, our values, our ideas, and without really

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Speaker 1: thinking about it, we discard or discredit anything that contradicts

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Speaker 1: us or what we believe because that other opinion or

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Speaker 1: that other version of truth or that other version of

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Speaker 1: what is feels threatening when it challenges our self story

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Speaker 1: or our worldview, and we don't like being threatened. In fact,

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Speaker 1: our brain one of the things that our brain is

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Speaker 1: really hardwired for is confirmation and familiarity and comfort. So

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Speaker 1: it's not really we're not really looking for objectivity. We

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Speaker 1: like the idea of it, but when the boots are

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Speaker 1: on the ground in the middle of it, it's really

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Speaker 1: just mental self soothing, where where we're finding something that's comfortable.

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Speaker 1: And you know this is I mean, let me zoom

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Speaker 1: back a little bit. You know, we think about like

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Speaker 1: in personal development and self help and you know, human behavior, whatever,

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Speaker 1: whatever big banner we want to put over the top

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Speaker 1: of all of the stuff that I do with you

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Speaker 1: and share with you. Like we you know, we love

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Speaker 1: the idea of being a better person. We love that.

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Speaker 1: We love the idea of eating a great diet. We

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Speaker 1: love the idea of living our life which is aligned

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Speaker 1: with our values. We love the idea of being a

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Speaker 1: better communicator and a better parent. We love the idea

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Speaker 1: of knowing more and doing better. We love the idea

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Speaker 1: of improving performance and outcomes and having a spiritual life

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Speaker 1: and being having greater connection with others. And we love

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Speaker 1: all of these things that are constant conversations on this show.

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Speaker 1: But as I've said many times, away from the idea,

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Speaker 1: away from the thing that we like, away from the

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Speaker 1: intention or the desire, it ain't fucking easy. Like the

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Speaker 1: idea of open mindedness or objectivity, let's call it that.

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Speaker 1: That's the title, the idea of objectivity. It's really nice.

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Speaker 1: I want to be. Yeah, Craig, Craig's really objective, like

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Speaker 1: he really you know, minimum bias, really open minded, really neutral,

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Speaker 1: talk to him about anything. Yeah, no, that's not you can.

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Speaker 1: And I'm definitely better than some, but not all. And

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Speaker 1: some days you'll find me depending on where where I

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Speaker 1: am at, because I'm a human, i might be having

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Speaker 1: a shit day. I'm going to be absolute crap. I'm

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Speaker 1: going to be defensive. I'm going to find the story

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Speaker 1: that suits me. I'm going to be completely subjectively wrapped

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Speaker 1: in my own idea because in that moment, it fucking

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Speaker 1: suits me. And this is the disparity, This is the space,

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Speaker 1: This is the divergence between self help theory and life. Life.

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Speaker 1: Life is where we change. Life is where in the

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Speaker 1: middle of the shit and in the middle of the discomfort,

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Speaker 1: in the middle of the unfamiliarity, in the middle of

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Speaker 1: that interaction with that person where you want to be

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Speaker 1: defensive because they might be telling you something that does

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Speaker 1: an align with your something, and you fucking love your something.

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Speaker 1: You want to defend your something. Your something's the right something.

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Speaker 1: Fuck they're something right. Well, this moment that I'm describing

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Speaker 1: that is the moment where you and me need to

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Speaker 1: go hang on, is there something in there? Something? Is

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Speaker 1: there something in there something? Is there any chance that

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Speaker 1: my thought, idea, in my something, my belief, my standard,

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Speaker 1: my story, Is there any chance that it's a bit wrong,

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Speaker 1: quite a bit wrong, or completely fucking wrong. And it's

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Speaker 1: not so much about truth or facts or information as

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Speaker 1: it is about me protecting something that I want to protect.

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Speaker 1: And fuck you because I've thought this for a long time.

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Speaker 1: See here's the thing, right, Being really open minded an

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Speaker 1: objective requires great strength, great strength, great humility, great awareness,

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Speaker 1: great resilience. Like this is really fucking hard. The idea

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Speaker 1: of it requires no effort me talking about it, just

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Speaker 1: talking doing it. And this is true for all things

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Speaker 1: in the human experience. When we're trying to grow, learn, evolve, adapt,

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Speaker 1: become better. Like you and I are all programmed, even

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Speaker 1: if we don't realize it. An objectivity or a level

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Speaker 1: of objectivity requires us to step outside of our or

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Speaker 1: at the very least be aware of our programming and

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Speaker 1: aware of the things that perhaps stand between us and

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Speaker 1: the what is, the what isness of reality beyond our reality,

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Speaker 1: the what isness that lives beyond our window or our

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Speaker 1: curtain or our bias. Most of us live in echo chambers,

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Speaker 1: you know, pay attention to the same things, the same

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Speaker 1: news sources, the same people, the same algorithms, the same shows,

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Speaker 1: the same the same everything. And it's not objectivity. That

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Speaker 1: ain't objectivity, it's just groupthink. This is me just living

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Speaker 1: in a cult of thought. This is me, This is

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Speaker 1: me finding something that makes me feel better about what

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Speaker 1: I already believe. You know so much of my journey,

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Speaker 1: you know, with my PhD and with all the other

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Speaker 1: things that I'm sorry to bore you with all my shit.

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Speaker 1: By the way, it must be fucking mindlessly boring to

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Speaker 1: keep hearing me bang on about stuff. But my life

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Speaker 1: is my life, isn't it. Uh? But you know, there

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Speaker 1: are so many things I've had to unlearn. There are

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Speaker 1: so many things that I've needed to admit that I

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Speaker 1: didn't know, or I needed to admit that something that

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Speaker 1: I thought was wrong. And we don't want to I'm

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Speaker 1: globalizing here. You might not be like this, and if

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Speaker 1: you're not fucking gou but we don't like to be

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Speaker 1: wrong publicly. We don't even want to be wrong in

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Speaker 1: front of one person, let alone fucking publicly. Like I

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Speaker 1: look back at the stuff that I've done on this show,

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Speaker 1: and some of it's really good. I think some of

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Speaker 1: it's in the ballpark of good to great maybe, and

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Speaker 1: then some of its shits, and some of it's in

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Speaker 1: the middle. Some conversations I did pretty well, some I

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Speaker 1: did pretty bad. Some were are a bit of a

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Speaker 1: train wreck, you know. But the truth is just the truth.

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Speaker 1: Like me telling myself that all of the work that

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Speaker 1: I do is somewhere between good and amazing is me

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Speaker 1: being deluded because it's just not true. It's just not true.

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Speaker 1: I am not the best, I am not incredible. I

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Speaker 1: am not And people go, oh, stop talking yourself down. No,

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Speaker 1: this is not talking yourself down. This has been practical

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Speaker 1: and real. This is like, you know, there are days

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Speaker 1: where I do really good work. There are days where

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Speaker 1: I'm a fucking catastrophe and I don't even want to

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Speaker 1: be around me, and I am me. But I think

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Speaker 1: I think part of the secret is is just doing

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Speaker 1: what I'm doing now, which is saying, hey, you know what,

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Speaker 1: I don't know of all the stuff there is to know,

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Speaker 1: Like I feel like this. I feel like mankind humanity.

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Speaker 1: We think of all the things there is to know,

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Speaker 1: we know ninety nine percent. You know, let's say of

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Speaker 1: everything there is to know, that equals one hundred percent.

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Speaker 1: I feel like mankind we currently think that we know

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Speaker 1: about now. You know, there's still some stuff to learn,

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Speaker 1: but maybe ninety percent, I think, And this is just

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Speaker 1: a thought. I can't I can't quote you anything on this.

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Speaker 1: I can't even give you a I probably could, but

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Speaker 1: I'm not going to. But I don't think we really

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Speaker 1: understand or know or comprehend one percent of all there

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Speaker 1: is to know for humans. Let's call that one hundred percent.

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Speaker 1: I don't think we know one. That's not to say

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Speaker 1: I think we're globally ignorant and stupid. I don't think

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Speaker 1: that either, But I just think we can't even begin

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Speaker 1: to understand what there is beyond the tininess of the

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Speaker 1: human mind and the tininess of the human brain. We

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Speaker 1: think brains are fucking brilliant. Well they are, but they're limited.

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Speaker 1: You know that my thinking is limited, my understanding is limited,

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Speaker 1: My cognitive horsepower is limited. And so being able to

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Speaker 1: recognize that you know most of what there is to know,

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Speaker 1: I don't know and probably never will know. And also

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Speaker 1: that's fine, that's fine. Being able to learn things that

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Speaker 1: quiet knowledge expose ourselves to new ideas and thoughts and

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Speaker 1: information and research is great. But also to be able

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Speaker 1: to when the time is right, when the situation calls

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Speaker 1: for it, to be able to unlearn things. Because when

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Speaker 1: we've learned things that we have intertwined with the way

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Speaker 1: that we live and our identity and our sense of

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Speaker 1: who we are the self, and those flaw those ideas

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Speaker 1: are in some way flawed. Well, that sets us lf

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Speaker 1: up for problems. And one of the problems being that

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Speaker 1: you know, I've built a way of living and being

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Speaker 1: and doing on perhaps an ideology that is that that

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Speaker 1: could be I'm not talking about anything in particular, but

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Speaker 1: it could be flawed. It could be flawed. Think about this,

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Speaker 1: what if you eat a certain mind. I'm not talking

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Speaker 1: about any particular model of eating, so don't try and

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Speaker 1: assume I'm just talking globally. Let's say, let's say, you know,

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Speaker 1: five years ago, you met someone and they said to you,

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Speaker 1: they showed you research, they did all this stuff, and

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Speaker 1: they went, you know, this is the best way. People

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Speaker 1: haven't caught on yet, but this is the single best

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Speaker 1: way to human for human beings to eat. And you

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Speaker 1: you brought in, You brought in mentally, you brought in emotionally,

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Speaker 1: you brought in socially and behaviorally, and this person just

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Speaker 1: they convinced the shit out of you, and you went, fuck,

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Speaker 1: I'm on board. Now you're five years down the track,

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00:26:43,960 --> 00:26:49,560
Speaker 1: and this way of eating is unequivocally intertwined with who

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Speaker 1: you are, how you live, and people who don't eat

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Speaker 1: like you are dumb and uninformed and they're gonna die

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Speaker 1: earlier than you, and blah blah blah blah. Now, thing

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00:27:00,440 --> 00:27:04,479
Speaker 1: like this, this theoretical example I'm giving, Things like this

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00:27:04,560 --> 00:27:07,760
Speaker 1: exist all the time, with a myriad of different subjects, right,

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Speaker 1: and a myriad of different kind of focuses. Only to

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Speaker 1: find out after the five years that, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: all of this or some of this was based on

394
00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:21,600
Speaker 1: a flawed idea, only to find out that now I'm

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00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:25,320
Speaker 1: actually sicker than I would have been if I hadn't

396
00:27:25,359 --> 00:27:29,399
Speaker 1: eaten how I was previously eating, or I've now predisposed

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Speaker 1: myself to this condition or that condition because I was

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Speaker 1: following flawed science or a flawed idea or whatever it was.

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Speaker 1: And this is the challenge. Is when we are when

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Speaker 1: we believe a thing will, we're emotional, We're emotional about it.

401
00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:50,119
Speaker 1: And the moment that I am emotional about something that

402
00:27:50,320 --> 00:27:53,359
Speaker 1: I believe to be right, that I am certain about

403
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:56,520
Speaker 1: that will, now that fucking wears the objectivity there is none.

404
00:27:56,600 --> 00:28:00,600
Speaker 1: Because I know that I'm right. I am un teachable

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00:28:00,680 --> 00:28:04,040
Speaker 1: now because I know that I'm right, I know that

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00:28:04,119 --> 00:28:06,840
Speaker 1: my God is the God, so you can't teach me.

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00:28:07,720 --> 00:28:10,360
Speaker 1: And everyone who doesn't follow my God, or everyone who

408
00:28:10,480 --> 00:28:14,359
Speaker 1: doesn't have the divine conduit to you know, whoever or

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Speaker 1: whatever that I have, well, they're going to Hell or

410
00:28:16,720 --> 00:28:19,639
Speaker 1: they're going wherever, wherever it is. I think they're going

411
00:28:19,760 --> 00:28:22,920
Speaker 1: because I'm right. And everyone who doesn't work out this way,

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Speaker 1: everyone who doesn't do this kind of training, this kind

413
00:28:26,080 --> 00:28:30,040
Speaker 1: of functional training with kettlebells and this, and that they're dummies,

414
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Speaker 1: they're trapped in the eighties. They're dumb, they don't know.

415
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:36,399
Speaker 1: And everyone who doesn't invest their money this way, and

416
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Speaker 1: everyone who doesn't realize that that monogamy is stupid. Polygamy

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00:28:41,160 --> 00:28:43,400
Speaker 1: is how it should be. And this is whatever the

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Speaker 1: fucking belief is. And when when that's you, you're gone.

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00:28:51,080 --> 00:28:56,280
Speaker 1: You're gone because you have built a psychological and emotional

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00:28:56,400 --> 00:29:00,640
Speaker 1: prison for yourself because for a range of reasons, you

421
00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:06,320
Speaker 1: can't wink wink, you can't be wrong, because you build

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00:29:06,360 --> 00:29:09,720
Speaker 1: an operating system based on the things that you know

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Speaker 1: you are right about. And your brain doesn't want truth.

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Speaker 1: It wants comfort. Your brain wants certainty, your brain wants safety,

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Speaker 1: your brain wants consistency. And we do it backwards. We rationalize,

426
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:37,959
Speaker 1: we rationalize backwards. We decide emotionally. We make decisions based

427
00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:41,640
Speaker 1: on fear and anxiety and self preservation, and so we

428
00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:46,800
Speaker 1: make these decisions which are essentially emotionally driven, and then

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00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:54,280
Speaker 1: we try to justify it with logic and objectivity. Just

430
00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:59,920
Speaker 1: dies in the spin cycle of self justification, like self

431
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:06,520
Speaker 1: justifification and self rationalization, and it's the opposite of objectivity,

432
00:30:06,800 --> 00:30:12,320
Speaker 1: an open mindedness. All right, so what do we do?

433
00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:16,640
Speaker 1: So you and I are never going to be completely objective.

434
00:30:17,280 --> 00:30:19,880
Speaker 1: And that's because if you or I have any pre

435
00:30:19,960 --> 00:30:24,600
Speaker 1: existing anything, ideas, thoughts, believes, values, experience is conditioning, programming.

436
00:30:25,000 --> 00:30:27,240
Speaker 1: Of course, that's going to influence us. And that's okay.

437
00:30:27,720 --> 00:30:29,920
Speaker 1: That is not a bad thing. What is a good

438
00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:34,040
Speaker 1: thing is to be aware of that. A bad thing

439
00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:36,520
Speaker 1: is to pretend that none of us or none of

440
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:40,640
Speaker 1: that affects the way that we make a decision. Yep, No,

441
00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:44,040
Speaker 1: I'm totally objective. This does not affect my thinking, This

442
00:30:44,160 --> 00:30:47,720
Speaker 1: does not affect my decision making. It will not affect

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00:30:47,760 --> 00:30:50,320
Speaker 1: how I treat you or talk to you. It will not.

444
00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:53,800
Speaker 1: That's bullshit, and we all need to know and say

445
00:30:53,920 --> 00:30:57,000
Speaker 1: and admit that that's bullshit. But what I will try

446
00:30:57,040 --> 00:30:59,320
Speaker 1: to do is I will try to be aware of

447
00:30:59,400 --> 00:31:03,240
Speaker 1: my bullshit so that I can You know, this is

448
00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:08,480
Speaker 1: an amazing exercise in self awareness, right, Self awareness and

449
00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:12,120
Speaker 1: self regulation is in the moment. I have to do

450
00:31:12,160 --> 00:31:14,080
Speaker 1: this all the time. There are so many times when

451
00:31:15,560 --> 00:31:19,160
Speaker 1: I want to talk to somebody about let's say, health

452
00:31:19,280 --> 00:31:23,720
Speaker 1: and fitness and wellness and nutrition and training is a

453
00:31:23,840 --> 00:31:27,120
Speaker 1: very specific example for me, but you might imagine right now,

454
00:31:28,440 --> 00:31:30,600
Speaker 1: I want to talk to them in a way or

455
00:31:30,640 --> 00:31:34,080
Speaker 1: I'm compelled to just fucking cut to the chase, right

456
00:31:34,760 --> 00:31:38,360
Speaker 1: because I know how to fix this again, wink wink,

457
00:31:38,680 --> 00:31:40,600
Speaker 1: I know how to fix it. And I know you know.

458
00:31:40,680 --> 00:31:44,400
Speaker 1: This is a psychological problem with a physiological outcome, and

459
00:31:44,440 --> 00:31:46,760
Speaker 1: your food's is not the problem, and your your training

460
00:31:46,800 --> 00:31:48,920
Speaker 1: is not the problem, and resources are not the problem.

461
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:53,560
Speaker 1: It's not a time management issue. It's a psychological issue

462
00:31:53,560 --> 00:31:56,080
Speaker 1: that's creating all of these bad choices and behaviors and

463
00:31:56,120 --> 00:31:59,320
Speaker 1: actions and lifestyle and that outcomes. And I know because

464
00:31:59,360 --> 00:32:01,520
Speaker 1: I'm crak up, I've done this fucking a million times.

465
00:32:01,640 --> 00:32:05,720
Speaker 1: Well guess what, I don't know. I don't know. I

466
00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:08,160
Speaker 1: know a fair bit, but I get shit wrong even

467
00:32:08,200 --> 00:32:12,520
Speaker 1: with this all of the time. I might come in

468
00:32:12,560 --> 00:32:18,120
Speaker 1: with the best intentions to chat to Diane about her health, wellness, fitness,

469
00:32:18,280 --> 00:32:21,720
Speaker 1: energy and so on, and I go, listen, I've got Diana,

470
00:32:21,720 --> 00:32:23,600
Speaker 1: I'm sixty one, I've been doing this fade years. I've

471
00:32:23,600 --> 00:32:25,840
Speaker 1: got forty three years of experience. Bat down the hatchet,

472
00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:27,640
Speaker 1: to sit the fuck down and pay attention, because I'm

473
00:32:27,640 --> 00:32:29,200
Speaker 1: going to fucking blow your head off and change your

474
00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:32,680
Speaker 1: life right. Fourteen minutes later, she walks out because I'm

475
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:36,120
Speaker 1: a dickhead and I'm not relating and I'm I'm just

476
00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:39,080
Speaker 1: looking at it through the craigfilter. I have no idea,

477
00:32:39,240 --> 00:32:44,120
Speaker 1: no understanding, no objectivity, no awareness of what this is

478
00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:49,280
Speaker 1: for her, because I'm not understanding the objective reality of

479
00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:52,800
Speaker 1: what I'm in the middle of. I'm in the Craig reality.

480
00:32:53,760 --> 00:32:57,560
Speaker 1: I'm all about the subjective truth of what I know

481
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:01,440
Speaker 1: versus what Diane doesn't know. And you're here because I'm

482
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:06,200
Speaker 1: the expert. So pay attention. You're welcome, you with me,

483
00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:09,760
Speaker 1: and this is you and me all the time. And

484
00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:11,600
Speaker 1: this is something that we need to be well, we

485
00:33:11,640 --> 00:33:13,520
Speaker 1: don't need to, but I would suggest we need to

486
00:33:13,600 --> 00:33:19,000
Speaker 1: be mindful of something that we lean into get curious about.

487
00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:26,480
Speaker 1: So we're less we're less inclined to want to be right,

488
00:33:28,320 --> 00:33:31,320
Speaker 1: and we're more inclined to want to be curious and

489
00:33:31,400 --> 00:33:37,360
Speaker 1: to understand and to build connection and rapport with people.

490
00:33:37,440 --> 00:33:43,040
Speaker 1: Because that old chestnut we're looking through their window, you know,

491
00:33:43,240 --> 00:33:45,920
Speaker 1: that old chestnut of that I drag out too many

492
00:33:45,920 --> 00:33:50,840
Speaker 1: times of theory of mind is trying to understand their

493
00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:55,240
Speaker 1: version of what is. And if you can understand your

494
00:33:55,360 --> 00:33:58,040
Speaker 1: version of what is and their version of what is,

495
00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:03,760
Speaker 1: and you can understand a perspective or have insight into

496
00:34:03,840 --> 00:34:07,880
Speaker 1: a perspective or a reality or a version of right

497
00:34:07,960 --> 00:34:12,319
Speaker 1: now that isn't yours, then you're opening the objectivity door

498
00:34:12,800 --> 00:34:13,800
Speaker 1: just a little bit wider