WEBVTT - Backup is three hours away. Part 1 0:00:01.560 --> 0:00:05.000 A used grave, not a new grave. We are talking 0:00:05.040 --> 0:00:09.239 an occupied grave, complete with headstone. I look over the top, 0:00:09.680 --> 0:00:12.560 here's this guy up to his neck in the grave 0:00:13.000 --> 0:00:17.520 shoveling it out right, and I'm thinking, there's something you 0:00:17.800 --> 0:00:18.919 don't see every day. 0:00:19.079 --> 0:00:24.119 No, when we watched Western's as youngsters, one thing we 0:00:24.239 --> 0:00:26.960 would always say would be the formation of a possey. 0:00:27.640 --> 0:00:31.480 You claim to have formed a possey. I'm Andrew Rule. 0:00:31.640 --> 0:00:34.919 This is Life and Crimes Today. We're going to embark 0:00:34.960 --> 0:00:37.839 on a series of podcasts. 0:00:37.720 --> 0:00:40.240 With a guest to the studio, Mark Tregallis. 0:00:40.240 --> 0:00:44.320 Now. I met Mark Tregallis at distant parts of East 0:00:44.360 --> 0:00:47.280 Gippsland some years ago when there was a terrible bushfire 0:00:48.159 --> 0:00:53.600 at Malicutera, Malanicuta and Mark, you were a copperate Malicuda 0:00:53.840 --> 0:00:57.880 or the copperate Malicuda the policeman for many years. Well, 0:00:57.880 --> 0:00:58.600 you're not so. 0:00:58.960 --> 0:01:03.160 I was stationed in Malancouta for sixteen years and it 0:01:03.280 --> 0:01:06.920 varied between at some stages during those sixteen years of 0:01:07.000 --> 0:01:11.240 us having four or five policemen staying there. To the 0:01:11.319 --> 0:01:16.160 first day that I arrived, the sergeant handed me his keys, 0:01:16.480 --> 0:01:18.360 said these are the keys to the police station. Make 0:01:18.400 --> 0:01:20.399 yourself at home, I'm off to his team or for 0:01:20.480 --> 0:01:22.319 six months, right, and that was it. 0:01:22.440 --> 0:01:25.400 That was it, you marked you and your family had 0:01:25.400 --> 0:01:26.959 the wife and kids with you. 0:01:27.440 --> 0:01:31.280 Correct. So at that stage I was married and the 0:01:31.319 --> 0:01:33.920 first kid was on the way. Yep. And I've since 0:01:33.959 --> 0:01:36.800 then had three daughters and they now all have done 0:01:36.840 --> 0:01:38.880 the reverse trip back to Melbourne for university. 0:01:38.880 --> 0:01:42.520 And now you're following them down to keep an eye 0:01:42.600 --> 0:01:46.280 on things. Oh pretty much, Yes, visit, but along the 0:01:46.319 --> 0:01:48.080 way I know this for a fact. Along the way 0:01:48.120 --> 0:01:51.760 you gathered quite a lot of interesting country copper stories. 0:01:52.040 --> 0:01:55.200 And you're a pretty good teller of stories, and in 0:01:55.240 --> 0:01:58.760 fact you have published them in a book. 0:01:58.880 --> 0:02:02.600 My three daughters got me to write down all the 0:02:02.720 --> 0:02:05.920 crazy police stories. They wanted it for their kids and 0:02:05.960 --> 0:02:09.520 their grandkids when when they got older. I never thought 0:02:09.560 --> 0:02:12.079 it would get published, and when it did, I thought 0:02:12.080 --> 0:02:14.000 I would have to buy every copy and give it 0:02:14.200 --> 0:02:16.679 to extended family as a Christmas present for the next 0:02:16.720 --> 0:02:19.840 ten years. So I was a bit amazed when it 0:02:20.040 --> 0:02:22.519 sold out in three weeks. 0:02:22.720 --> 0:02:27.040 It's mark that reflects not only the content, which is good, 0:02:27.320 --> 0:02:30.200 but the title, and the title is remarkably good. 0:02:30.240 --> 0:02:33.440 What is it? Well? I know, but I'm asking you no. 0:02:33.639 --> 0:02:36.320 So the title is back up is three hours away. 0:02:36.440 --> 0:02:38.200 That sort of nails it, doesn't it. 0:02:38.639 --> 0:02:42.120 And there have been many, many times in my career 0:02:42.160 --> 0:02:46.080 where backup has been three hours away. To give you 0:02:46.120 --> 0:02:49.160 an idea of the far East s Gippsland in particular, 0:02:49.600 --> 0:02:52.080 is a huge area. There's a very low population and 0:02:52.240 --> 0:02:56.800 very few police. So at times during those sixteen years 0:02:56.919 --> 0:03:03.880 I was patrolling four thousand square miles by myself and 0:03:04.040 --> 0:03:07.400 I would get given jobs that would take me two 0:03:07.440 --> 0:03:10.600 and a half hours to drive to. That's just one way. 0:03:10.480 --> 0:03:13.440 And that's the border basically from the border right through 0:03:13.520 --> 0:03:16.200 to somewhere like ben River close to Orbost. 0:03:16.240 --> 0:03:19.720 I guess. So what happens is when you become a 0:03:19.760 --> 0:03:22.080 police officer on the border, you become a police officer 0:03:22.200 --> 0:03:24.720 in the adjoining state, so as a police officer in 0:03:24.840 --> 0:03:28.519 Victoria and a special constable in New South Wales. 0:03:29.240 --> 0:03:31.040 So you have got jurisdiction if you need. 0:03:30.919 --> 0:03:33.720 It, so you can continue it pursued across the border. 0:03:33.760 --> 0:03:36.840 You can arrest people with the same powers that New 0:03:36.880 --> 0:03:40.120 South Wales police have. However, you have no idea what 0:03:40.160 --> 0:03:42.400 the paperwork is, so you have to take them to 0:03:42.480 --> 0:03:44.640 a new South Wales police station and then just sign 0:03:44.680 --> 0:03:46.320 on the bottom line after the other guys with them, 0:03:46.400 --> 0:03:48.920 Where do they go to court if they're naughty? So 0:03:49.400 --> 0:03:52.280 if in Malicuta it would be Eaten magistrates court they 0:03:52.280 --> 0:03:55.360 would go to unless it was somewhat more serious, in 0:03:55.400 --> 0:03:57.160 which case they would probably. 0:03:57.440 --> 0:03:59.200 So they go to court in the other state. If 0:03:59.200 --> 0:04:04.040 you're pursue the border, it becomes their jurisdiction for court. 0:04:04.600 --> 0:04:07.120 If I pursue a car over the border and arrest 0:04:07.160 --> 0:04:09.320 them over the border, I can't bring them back. It's 0:04:09.360 --> 0:04:12.400 an extradition, gotcha right, So I have to take them. 0:04:12.600 --> 0:04:16.320 Okay, now along the way. Your daughters are on the 0:04:16.320 --> 0:04:18.600 money because they know the stories. They've heard many of them. 0:04:18.600 --> 0:04:20.520 They were there when they happened in some. 0:04:20.360 --> 0:04:24.719 Respects when I was a first moved to the country. 0:04:24.800 --> 0:04:27.360 I moved to Portland. Back in those days, during the 0:04:27.440 --> 0:04:32.680 Kennedy era, police, police, nurses, teachers used to have homes 0:04:32.680 --> 0:04:35.560 that you could rent at six percent before mister Kenneth 0:04:35.560 --> 0:04:40.080 sold them all. And what happened was I was meant 0:04:40.120 --> 0:04:42.520 to get one, but I couldn't. The guy was six 0:04:42.600 --> 0:04:44.480 So they said, could you find somewhere else? And then 0:04:44.640 --> 0:04:46.680 someone came up to me and said, look, there's this 0:04:47.000 --> 0:04:50.400 one hundred year old farmhouse out at whites Beach, which 0:04:50.440 --> 0:04:53.720 was about twenty five kilometers from Portland. At seventy five 0:04:53.760 --> 0:04:56.080 dollars a week, and I've gone for seventy five dollars, 0:04:56.120 --> 0:05:00.840 I am there. So I moved this. Now I got 0:05:00.880 --> 0:05:02.440 to admit I as a city boy, grew up in 0:05:02.800 --> 0:05:05.320 Syndall Mount Waverley my whole life, had never lived in 0:05:05.320 --> 0:05:08.400 the country. So I moved into this one hundred year 0:05:08.440 --> 0:05:12.280 old farmhouse. It was so old that when the wind blew, 0:05:12.279 --> 0:05:14.440 the wall paper used to come out about two feet. 0:05:15.360 --> 0:05:18.240 It was in winter, and I remember lighting the fire 0:05:18.360 --> 0:05:22.160 and watching TV with a family of mice on the hearth. 0:05:22.680 --> 0:05:28.000 It had character, Oh, it had characters. It also had 0:05:28.120 --> 0:05:32.960 an outdoor toilet and a semi detached shower. It was 0:05:33.080 --> 0:05:36.120 part of a ward in section of the verandah. Excellent. 0:05:36.400 --> 0:05:39.159 So on my first morning, I walked naked out the 0:05:39.160 --> 0:05:42.400 front door because I could, and into the ward in 0:05:42.440 --> 0:05:45.640 section of the veranda and into the bathroom. Now, the 0:05:45.800 --> 0:05:49.239 bath slash shower was one of those enameled cast iron 0:05:49.279 --> 0:05:52.000 tubs on four legs with a wrap around curtain. No 0:05:52.120 --> 0:05:56.120 extractor fan pushed against a far wall where there was 0:05:56.120 --> 0:05:58.120 this four foot wide lap sash window that you could 0:05:58.160 --> 0:06:00.440 drop down and that would let the steam out. Yep, 0:06:01.080 --> 0:06:04.480 and I work that out. I'm in the shower shampooing. 0:06:05.320 --> 0:06:07.520 What I didn't know was that there was a horse 0:06:07.520 --> 0:06:09.960 in the paddock next to the shower that heard the 0:06:09.960 --> 0:06:12.400 water and walked over. And it looked through the window 0:06:12.440 --> 0:06:16.560 and went water, think I'll have a drink. So it 0:06:16.600 --> 0:06:19.480 sticks its head through the window and proceeds to drink 0:06:19.560 --> 0:06:23.159 out of the shower. This is twelve inches in front 0:06:23.160 --> 0:06:25.120 of my fate. I'm completely oblivious to it because my 0:06:25.160 --> 0:06:27.839 eyes are closed because I'm shampooing. Then the horse turns around, 0:06:27.880 --> 0:06:31.640 looks at me, and says to itself, gee, I wonder 0:06:31.640 --> 0:06:34.360 what that white stuff tastes like. Let me tell you, 0:06:34.640 --> 0:06:37.480 getting licked in the face by a horse when you're 0:06:37.560 --> 0:06:42.040 naked in the shower is exciting. That would be. In fact, 0:06:42.160 --> 0:06:45.480 it's so exciting it bears detail. The lick goes in 0:06:46.240 --> 0:06:48.360 and with the tongue pretty much still attached, your eyes 0:06:48.400 --> 0:06:51.480 open and in the split second before the sud sit 0:06:51.560 --> 0:06:54.240 them and they close. The only thing you focus on 0:06:54.720 --> 0:06:57.360 is this massive set of teeth six inches in front 0:06:57.400 --> 0:06:59.280 of your face, and a horse not the first thing 0:06:59.320 --> 0:07:01.360 to come to mind as you're naked in the shower, 0:07:01.360 --> 0:07:03.440 But the first thing that does, for some unknown reason, 0:07:03.760 --> 0:07:06.640 is the monster from the Aliens movie. So you exit 0:07:06.680 --> 0:07:08.440 the shower, taken the rod and the curtain with you. 0:07:08.440 --> 0:07:11.720 I exited so fast, I hit the far wall, horse, 0:07:11.800 --> 0:07:14.800 ride up, heard its head for occasionally. I got used 0:07:14.800 --> 0:07:17.360 to the horse, and I shampooed the horse's face as well. 0:07:17.400 --> 0:07:20.120 And now the only problem with you got you. 0:07:20.160 --> 0:07:21.040 Got mates with the horse. 0:07:21.240 --> 0:07:23.280 Living out yeah, yeah, it would turn up. It would 0:07:23.280 --> 0:07:26.720 turn up every shower. Good God. Now the only problem 0:07:26.800 --> 0:07:28.640 with living out at White Speech was did he have 0:07:28.640 --> 0:07:32.000 a drink the horse? Did he ever? Did you ever? Trop? Yeah? 0:07:32.000 --> 0:07:35.640 It wasn't there. So the only problem with living out 0:07:35.640 --> 0:07:37.720 there was the exorbitant rent. So I got young Johnny 0:07:37.760 --> 0:07:40.440 to move in with me, another unconstable. So on John's 0:07:40.440 --> 0:07:43.400 first morning, he's sitting in the kitchen having a cup 0:07:43.440 --> 0:07:46.440 of coffee. You didn't tell him about the horse, did you? No? Here? 0:07:46.440 --> 0:07:49.560 When he looks up and sees me walk naked past 0:07:49.640 --> 0:07:51.760 him out the front door. So so John's head comes 0:07:51.760 --> 0:07:55.400 around the corner and he goes drink. I've got, yeah, mate, 0:07:56.360 --> 0:08:00.000 we're going and I look in and I go shower. 0:08:01.280 --> 0:08:03.640 And then he looks at me and he says, why 0:08:03.640 --> 0:08:11.440 do you have a large carrot in your hand? And 0:08:11.600 --> 0:08:15.520 you held the pause, fair question, you held, and I said, 0:08:15.560 --> 0:08:19.880 I often shower with a carrot. And he goes, you 0:08:20.040 --> 0:08:23.720 eat the carrot in the shower. I go, no, so 0:08:25.040 --> 0:08:28.080 what do you do in the shower with the carrot? 0:08:28.160 --> 0:08:31.320 And I've gone you'll find out soon enough. So a 0:08:31.360 --> 0:08:35.720 couple of minutes later, he has his shower, meets the horse. 0:08:36.520 --> 0:08:38.520 In a couple of weeks, we're both sharing with carrots. Share. 0:08:39.000 --> 0:08:42.240 I see. So that was my first introduction to country policing. 0:08:42.559 --> 0:08:47.120 That is a very funny story. And you couldn't make 0:08:47.160 --> 0:08:47.520 it up. 0:08:47.720 --> 0:08:49.520 Oh no, you cannot make this stuff up. 0:08:50.320 --> 0:08:52.840 Funny about running water and horses. I love running water. 0:08:55.520 --> 0:09:00.200 Tell us about and I'm racking my brain's here from 0:09:00.240 --> 0:09:03.599 when we've chatted in the past. Just casually gun to 0:09:03.760 --> 0:09:04.280 the German. 0:09:04.880 --> 0:09:08.080 Okay, so this isn't exactly a high crime story, but 0:09:08.160 --> 0:09:12.520 it is somewhat hilarious. I was stationed in Apollo Bay 0:09:12.559 --> 0:09:15.400 at the time, and we're working an afternoon shift so 0:09:15.480 --> 0:09:17.960 knocking off at midnight, and at about six o'clock that 0:09:19.160 --> 0:09:21.760 afternoon we got a phone call asking for an assistance 0:09:22.120 --> 0:09:25.679 with a German tourist whose car had broken down on 0:09:25.760 --> 0:09:29.480 the Grad Ocean Road. This happened a lot. We often 0:09:29.640 --> 0:09:34.640 would have problems with visiting, especially European drivers, because they 0:09:34.640 --> 0:09:37.280 would drive along the Grad Ocean Road, see an amazing site, 0:09:37.320 --> 0:09:39.719 pull over, take some photos, get back in the car, 0:09:39.800 --> 0:09:41.480 and then immediately drive on the wrong side of the 0:09:41.559 --> 0:09:45.360 road and a car coming the other way could cause problems, 0:09:45.360 --> 0:09:48.360 but Gunda didn't have this. We just got one there 0:09:48.400 --> 0:09:49.960 and I could just smell when I got to the 0:09:49.960 --> 0:09:52.880 car that his clutch had basically burnt out. So we 0:09:52.920 --> 0:09:55.439 secured the car. We got him back into the police 0:09:55.440 --> 0:09:57.920 station and sat him down, and there was a car 0:09:58.080 --> 0:10:01.800 quite close just in lawn his company, so they drove 0:10:01.880 --> 0:10:03.640 up and only took an hour for him to get there, 0:10:03.760 --> 0:10:07.360 so good to just sat in the police station and 0:10:07.640 --> 0:10:09.480 when the next car came up, the guy handed him 0:10:09.520 --> 0:10:12.920 the keys, so then we waved goodbye and Gunta headed off. 0:10:14.160 --> 0:10:17.600 Not ten minutes later, we get another call from Gunta 0:10:18.360 --> 0:10:21.640 saying that this car is broken down, so we go 0:10:21.840 --> 0:10:24.960 up to it, and sure enough he has burnt out 0:10:25.160 --> 0:10:30.200 a second clutch. And both cars were manual. So my 0:10:30.280 --> 0:10:32.440 first question to Gooda was have you ever driven a 0:10:32.440 --> 0:10:34.160 manual car? And he looked at me and said no, 0:10:35.160 --> 0:10:39.400 So he had no idea what he was doing to dry. 0:10:39.520 --> 0:10:42.040 So he's just burnt out two clutches. So I've secured 0:10:42.080 --> 0:10:44.120 the second car, got him in the back, taking him 0:10:44.120 --> 0:10:47.400 back to the police station for a second time. And 0:10:48.280 --> 0:10:50.160 this time there wasn't another car. They had to bring 0:10:50.240 --> 0:10:51.679 up one up from Melbourne. It was going to take 0:10:51.679 --> 0:10:55.240 another four hours and the company wasn't very happy with Gunta. 0:10:55.320 --> 0:10:58.920 Let me tell you, that's quite bizarre. So Gunta says, okay, 0:10:58.920 --> 0:11:01.240 then I'm going to go and get to read. So 0:11:01.320 --> 0:11:04.960 he disappears into town. Me and Andy are on deck 0:11:05.000 --> 0:11:07.480 at the time, and we're just doing paperwork in the station. 0:11:08.160 --> 0:11:10.240 Gunda comes back and he's sitting out the front of 0:11:10.240 --> 0:11:13.000 the of the watchhouse, which is the area where the 0:11:13.040 --> 0:11:16.920 public can come in, and is reading. And I walk 0:11:17.120 --> 0:11:21.120 past him and I look down and Gunta's reading a 0:11:21.200 --> 0:11:25.600 porno right and well he is German. I do a 0:11:25.640 --> 0:11:29.679 double take and I go, Gunda, what are you doing? 0:11:30.080 --> 0:11:32.560 And he goes I am reading, and I go, you 0:11:32.600 --> 0:11:35.439 can't read a porno at a police station, freaking give 0:11:35.440 --> 0:11:38.480 it to me, pull it off and wrap it up 0:11:38.520 --> 0:11:40.400 so you can have it when you go. Women and 0:11:40.480 --> 0:11:42.679 kids coming to the police station. Bait. You can't do that, 0:11:43.720 --> 0:11:49.080 So he was quite indignant. Anyway, it's almost knockoff time 0:11:49.400 --> 0:11:53.679 when the third car arrives. This one is an automatic, 0:11:53.840 --> 0:11:57.400 so about time, Gunda is feeling a lot happier with this. 0:11:58.200 --> 0:12:02.600 And the guy pulls up into the police station driveway 0:12:03.160 --> 0:12:05.160 hands over his car. He wasn't too happy, let me 0:12:05.160 --> 0:12:08.240 tell you. So we go out there. Gunna gets in 0:12:08.240 --> 0:12:12.040 the car, starts at UF, waves to us and reverses 0:12:12.080 --> 0:12:14.360 into the telephone pole at the front of the police station. 0:12:14.840 --> 0:12:20.360 Oh magnificent. Me and Andy are just dumb struck. We 0:12:20.360 --> 0:12:23.760 were speechless. We could not believe it. So Gonda stops 0:12:23.760 --> 0:12:26.240 the car, gets out, goes to the back. Sea's this 0:12:26.400 --> 0:12:29.040 massive dent in it, looks up to us and says, 0:12:29.200 --> 0:12:32.120 what do I do? And I've looked at Gunter and 0:12:32.120 --> 0:12:36.120 gone get back in and keep driving. Just keep driving 0:12:37.000 --> 0:12:41.599 frontwardswards a wave far away from Apollo Bay as you 0:12:41.679 --> 0:12:42.360 possibly can. 0:12:42.480 --> 0:12:46.280 Absolute roll goal twenty four Carrot Gunta. 0:12:47.400 --> 0:12:51.480 So I've never before or had ever had anyone have 0:12:51.800 --> 0:12:55.160 three car accidents in an eight hour shift. 0:12:55.520 --> 0:13:00.719 What were they doing giving somebody who's who clearly good 0:13:00.720 --> 0:13:06.080 and driver manual a manual. Secondly, in my experience in Europe, 0:13:06.360 --> 0:13:12.080 everybody drives smallish manuals and they regard automatics as something 0:13:12.080 --> 0:13:13.040 for little old ladies. 0:13:13.960 --> 0:13:16.760 I didn't ask him at the time. It's bizarre, yeah, 0:13:16.800 --> 0:13:18.920 the whole thing. But the whole thing was just But 0:13:18.960 --> 0:13:21.200 the weirdest thing was when I passed him and looked 0:13:21.240 --> 0:13:25.720 up and just see him reaching this pornocrafty. I just 0:13:25.720 --> 0:13:28.760 couldn't believe it. Now, what's there a story? 0:13:29.120 --> 0:13:32.520 Tell me if this is you, the story about the graveyard. 0:13:31.960 --> 0:13:34.960 And oh no, that is me, that is you. I 0:13:35.000 --> 0:13:37.280 think you've got to tell that one. Okay, then well 0:13:37.280 --> 0:13:39.840 that is most definitely one. So that was down that 0:13:39.880 --> 0:13:42.959 way too. It was at Apollo Bay. Anyone who has 0:13:42.960 --> 0:13:46.920 traveled the Gradation road out of Apollo Bay, heading towards 0:13:46.960 --> 0:13:51.360 the Twelve Apostles, you go through a small satellite suburb 0:13:51.400 --> 0:13:53.560 a couple of k out of Apollo Bay called Maringo, 0:13:54.040 --> 0:13:56.880 and then you go up the Maringo Hill, and that's 0:13:56.960 --> 0:14:01.920 heading towards trove apostles and warnable and places. So one 0:14:02.000 --> 0:14:04.280 night I was working with Mick and we're driving back 0:14:04.640 --> 0:14:08.679 and we're ten minutes from knockoff, ten minutes from midnight, 0:14:09.120 --> 0:14:12.640 right And we come down the hill and I'm driving 0:14:12.679 --> 0:14:16.760 and I look across where the old Apollo Bay Cemetery 0:14:16.800 --> 0:14:18.959 is on the right hand side, and as I look up, 0:14:19.400 --> 0:14:22.480 I see a light and so I turned to Mick 0:14:22.480 --> 0:14:25.320 and I go, Mick, there's a light on in the cemetery. 0:14:25.680 --> 0:14:28.960 And he turns to me and says what. And I go, 0:14:29.200 --> 0:14:32.280 there's a light on in the cemetery. And he goes, 0:14:32.320 --> 0:14:34.600 it's a boat because it slopes down overlooks the water. 0:14:34.760 --> 0:14:36.360 And I go, no, no, no, no, So I slow down, 0:14:36.400 --> 0:14:39.840 I do a U tune. Mick goes, don't worry about it, 0:14:39.840 --> 0:14:43.800 it's just someone reading late. We pull up front entrance 0:14:43.840 --> 0:14:46.400 of the cemetery, headlights off. We both see a flicker 0:14:46.480 --> 0:14:49.880 of a hand, torch out. We get torches off. Walking 0:14:49.920 --> 0:14:53.760 through the cemetery, it is black, no moon, no stars. 0:14:54.200 --> 0:14:56.280 Can't see a hand in front of your face. We 0:14:56.320 --> 0:15:00.400 get to the middle of the cemetery and Mick goes, listen, stop, 0:15:00.880 --> 0:15:05.880 no word of a lie. We can hear this is 0:15:05.880 --> 0:15:08.680 a shovel noise, is it? It's the sound of someone digging. 0:15:08.840 --> 0:15:11.720 Oh my god. I look at Mich looks at me, 0:15:12.040 --> 0:15:13.880 and I've gone is that what I think it is? 0:15:14.000 --> 0:15:17.680 And he goes, yeah, I've gone, what do you want 0:15:17.680 --> 0:15:19.680 to do? He goes forget we ever heard it? Drive back, 0:15:19.760 --> 0:15:23.400 knock off. I've gone that's a good plan. And then 0:15:23.440 --> 0:15:26.920 he says, all we could investigate, and I've gone planned 0:15:26.960 --> 0:15:29.840 one still sounds better. And Mick says, come on, there's 0:15:29.840 --> 0:15:32.760 two of us. We're grown men. We've both got guns. 0:15:32.960 --> 0:15:36.240 And I've gone, oh right, then, would you hold my hand? 0:15:36.600 --> 0:15:41.480 So we're walking along, digging's getting louder. I have got 0:15:41.640 --> 0:15:43.840 no idea what we're going to find. All of a 0:15:43.880 --> 0:15:47.320 sudden that stops freeze. Thirty seconds later, digging starts up again. 0:15:47.400 --> 0:15:49.760 I get to the far end of the cemetery and 0:15:50.040 --> 0:15:54.520 over a used grave, not a new grave. We are 0:15:54.560 --> 0:15:58.800 talking an occupied grave, complete with headstone. I look over 0:15:58.840 --> 0:16:02.000 the top. Here's this guy up to his neck in 0:16:02.040 --> 0:16:06.880 the grave, shoveling it out right. And I'm thinking, there's 0:16:07.000 --> 0:16:11.000 something you don't see every day. No, And I'm crouched 0:16:11.040 --> 0:16:14.600 down behind the back of the tombstone, and my eyes 0:16:14.600 --> 0:16:19.360 are poking out over the top. I'm looking at this guy, 0:16:20.040 --> 0:16:22.560 and I'm thinking, you know, this guy's acting sus. Not 0:16:22.600 --> 0:16:25.240 that digging a grave out at midnight isn't slightly sus 0:16:25.240 --> 0:16:27.760 to start with, but he's got a black beanie pulled 0:16:27.760 --> 0:16:30.640 down over his head, and every couple of shovelfuls he's 0:16:30.680 --> 0:16:33.560 taking a nervous lookout towards the front entrance of the cemetery. 0:16:33.920 --> 0:16:36.840 Definitely something going on. So I stand up from behind 0:16:36.840 --> 0:16:40.320 the tombstone. As I do that, both knees go crack. 0:16:40.960 --> 0:16:43.040 This guy rockets around just in time to see my 0:16:43.120 --> 0:16:45.640 hands curl over the edge of the tombstone. I lean 0:16:45.720 --> 0:16:48.560 over the top of him and just say gooday. 0:16:49.400 --> 0:16:52.360 And we must point out to our listeners that you 0:16:52.480 --> 0:16:54.560 are in the old money. About what's six ' seven 0:16:54.720 --> 0:16:57.320 six ' eight, Sorry, I'm six eight. I've cheated you 0:16:57.320 --> 0:17:00.720 of an inch and that metric is too two two 0:17:01.080 --> 0:17:04.880 two two. So when you stand up over a gravestone 0:17:05.240 --> 0:17:08.240 at full height with the knees cracking, it's quite a 0:17:08.320 --> 0:17:11.240 sight at midnight. He screamed, He screamed. 0:17:11.359 --> 0:17:14.560 The shovels come flying out scrambling up the side of 0:17:14.600 --> 0:17:17.000 the grave with vid him with the torches. Police don't move. 0:17:17.040 --> 0:17:20.480 He's frozen. He's looked up. He's gone. Police. Oh thank god. 0:17:21.840 --> 0:17:23.800 We get him out, pull him up out of the hole. 0:17:23.960 --> 0:17:26.119 This guy is shaking like a leaf. And I have 0:17:26.160 --> 0:17:30.560 gone mate. I can't wait to hear your story, because 0:17:30.640 --> 0:17:33.680 if you do not have the world's greatest you are 0:17:33.920 --> 0:17:37.840 in so much trouble. I don't even know where to start. 0:17:38.320 --> 0:17:40.800 And he looks at us and goes, I'm the grave 0:17:40.800 --> 0:17:45.920 digger and I go the town grave digger, and he goes, aha, 0:17:46.040 --> 0:17:49.160 I go working at midnight by hisself, and he used 0:17:49.240 --> 0:17:52.240 grave no Carna LUTs and he says, oh, well, old 0:17:52.240 --> 0:17:54.280 Bill Clogs has got to be buried with his wife tomorrow. 0:17:54.280 --> 0:17:56.040 And I finished his grave off at half past six. 0:17:56.080 --> 0:17:57.359 But theyn now, I've got a phone call from his 0:17:57.480 --> 0:17:59.119 relatives at eight o'clock. They went out and had to 0:17:59.119 --> 0:18:00.600 look and phone me back to say that I dug 0:18:00.640 --> 0:18:02.119 the hole in the wrong spot and I had to 0:18:02.160 --> 0:18:04.639 come back and finish it before the funeral tomorrow. Then 0:18:04.680 --> 0:18:07.800 there's car pools in and it's his mate in a 0:18:07.960 --> 0:18:11.080 ute full of tools and lights who's been helping him 0:18:11.119 --> 0:18:14.400 all night, but they'd almost finished, so he'd gone home 0:18:14.440 --> 0:18:16.719 to get a six pack of beer and left him 0:18:16.760 --> 0:18:19.000 with a little torch with the batteries working. It was 0:18:19.080 --> 0:18:20.680 all above board. We were stunned. 0:18:20.920 --> 0:18:23.919 Oh that is magnificent, And you thought you had the 0:18:23.920 --> 0:18:25.120 best pinch of all time. 0:18:25.359 --> 0:18:27.639 I was all you got was the best story. I 0:18:27.680 --> 0:18:31.440 would have thought. I would have been looking up law 0:18:31.680 --> 0:18:36.399 from the sixteen hundreds from England grave my grave robbing 0:18:36.440 --> 0:18:40.879 and seeing if I could translate that into modern Victorian law. Magnificent. 0:18:41.040 --> 0:18:43.359 So yeah, look, i'd have bet a thousand bucks he 0:18:43.400 --> 0:18:44.960 couldn't have come up with a story. 0:18:45.000 --> 0:18:47.280 And there you are, in a sense. As soon as 0:18:47.320 --> 0:18:49.000 you heard it, you go, yeah, a little be right. 0:18:49.320 --> 0:18:53.359 Obviously he's just dung the wrong hole, and he's and 0:18:53.400 --> 0:18:53.720 he's made. 0:18:53.720 --> 0:18:55.800 They're going to dig the right hole. So he said 0:18:56.920 --> 0:18:59.080 carry on, And the guy looked at you, and carry on. 0:18:59.400 --> 0:19:02.399 He said, no, my mate's not gone. Ten minutes. I 0:19:02.440 --> 0:19:04.840 swear I can hear footsteps coming towards me. So I 0:19:04.840 --> 0:19:07.200 stop and I listen. Can't hear anything. Minute I started digging, 0:19:07.240 --> 0:19:10.760 footsteps getting closer than You've jumped up behind doom stuff. 0:19:11.320 --> 0:19:14.719 I've shot my pasts. He jumped in the car and 0:19:14.760 --> 0:19:15.800 barreled off with the guy. 0:19:16.000 --> 0:19:19.800 Oh that's wonderful. That is a great story. I had 0:19:19.960 --> 0:19:22.920 some early warning of that one. It's just bears repeating. 0:19:22.960 --> 0:19:24.760 It's a very good story. Now. 0:19:25.240 --> 0:19:28.720 You know, when we watched Westerns as youngsters, there was 0:19:28.760 --> 0:19:31.320 always you know, the villains wore black hats, the good 0:19:31.320 --> 0:19:34.439 guys wore white hats. The Indians as we used to 0:19:34.440 --> 0:19:38.159 call the Native Americans, were often I think Mexicans or 0:19:38.200 --> 0:19:41.960 Spanish or Italian or Greek actors often and it was 0:19:42.000 --> 0:19:45.280 pretty rough and ready. But one thing we would always 0:19:45.320 --> 0:19:48.240 see would be the formation of a possey. The bad 0:19:48.280 --> 0:19:54.119 guys would gallop off with handkerchiefs around their faces, and 0:19:54.119 --> 0:19:56.680 and then the possey would chase them and had them off. 0:19:56.600 --> 0:19:57.199 At the pass. 0:19:57.800 --> 0:20:01.639 You claim to have formed the in these Skipps Land. 0:20:01.600 --> 0:20:05.119 It is no also was in Apollo Bay. We had 0:20:05.119 --> 0:20:09.639 a fair bit happened in Apollo Bay. So I should 0:20:09.720 --> 0:20:13.120 first often say that that forming a posse is nothing 0:20:13.200 --> 0:20:16.120 that is ever taught in the academy, right, okay, but 0:20:16.160 --> 0:20:18.639 they've never studied this, You do not. 0:20:19.280 --> 0:20:22.440 You've had a bit toner with possums, but not posses. 0:20:22.200 --> 0:20:26.720 Correct, right. So what happens is a police officer can 0:20:26.960 --> 0:20:31.800 ask a member of the public for assistance in arresting someone, 0:20:32.119 --> 0:20:36.639 and a member of the public can voluntarily assist a 0:20:36.640 --> 0:20:40.560 police officer. The interesting part of this though, is that 0:20:40.640 --> 0:20:44.679 if that person whilst assisting the police officer is assaulted, 0:20:45.359 --> 0:20:50.520 then the offender is charged with assaulting police, even though 0:20:50.520 --> 0:20:52.560 they are not an employee of the police, they are 0:20:52.600 --> 0:20:55.560 acting at that time as a police officer. Yeah, fair enough, 0:20:55.600 --> 0:20:59.359 and that's fair. So as everyone would know who's driven 0:20:59.400 --> 0:21:02.040 down the Great Ocean Road a Pollar Bay lawn Port 0:21:02.080 --> 0:21:06.440 campbell during the summer period, it just becomes mad and 0:21:06.520 --> 0:21:09.679 there are hundreds of campers in there. So in the 0:21:09.680 --> 0:21:14.160 Apollo Ba caravan Ground, we got a phone call late 0:21:14.200 --> 0:21:17.920 one night that there were a group of young guys 0:21:17.920 --> 0:21:23.440 going around stealing things from caravans. And this was after midnight. 0:21:24.040 --> 0:21:27.359 So again I was working with Andy, and we drove 0:21:27.440 --> 0:21:31.600 down and parked the car and then decided we'd just 0:21:31.680 --> 0:21:34.080 sort of sit back with the binoculars. It was fairly 0:21:34.119 --> 0:21:35.960 well lit and we would have a look and we 0:21:36.200 --> 0:21:41.280 spotted five guys that were going around helping themselves opening 0:21:41.400 --> 0:21:44.440 Eski's taking out any drinks that were in there. A 0:21:44.560 --> 0:21:47.320