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Speaker 1: Apoday production, Welcome back to another episode.

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Speaker 2: Am I a Bad Mom Podcast?

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Speaker 3: And we're on Instagram too? Am I a bad mom?

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Speaker 2: Hit?

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Speaker 3: Miss?

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Speaker 4: As to when the last few days been a cracker?

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Speaker 4: I've been on fire just the shares.

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Speaker 3: I don't know about you, but I'm a bit sick

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Speaker 3: of social media? Like still follow us? Because am I

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Speaker 3: a bad mum for not wanting to be a part

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Speaker 3: of it? I actually want to talk about social media

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Speaker 3: because on a personal level, I find myself starting to

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Speaker 3: do a little like mini scroll and then I'm like, ough, look,

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Speaker 3: it doesn't make me feel good. Maybe I'm not following

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Speaker 3: the right Maybe I need to.

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Speaker 2: You need to clear your algorithm.

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Speaker 4: You can clear your algorithm and then you go through

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Speaker 4: and clear out anything of your followers that you don't

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Speaker 4: feel good about anymore. But do you know what is

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Speaker 4: not going to feel good about? Social media?

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Speaker 2: Though? These poor people like the Coldplay concert.

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Speaker 4: My whole feed is full of anything to do with

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Speaker 4: that Coldplay concept.

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Speaker 2: I genuinely feel sorry for them. Yeah, I mean I

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Speaker 2: feel so for everyone involved.

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Speaker 4: But like, let's go towards the conspiracy part of it, right,

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Speaker 4: It's kind of a needle in the haystack. Kind of

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Speaker 4: vibe like that was huge, that entire concert, huge needle

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Speaker 4: in haystack. Yeah, I'm gonna call it out and say,

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Speaker 4: I reckon something. There has been staged. I you reckon, yes,

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Speaker 4: one hundred percent.

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Speaker 2: How did you find the one person?

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Speaker 4: The one person or the sorry too, but the one

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Speaker 4: affair and that entire place there would have been way more,

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Speaker 4: but you found one.

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Speaker 2: And he happens to be the CEO of a like

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Speaker 2: some global.

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Speaker 4: And the friend's face right next to them when they

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Speaker 4: get caught is so red, so fast, and she apparently

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Speaker 4: is the one that organized tickets. And then for Chris

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Speaker 4: Martin to call out like anyone would think they're having

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Speaker 4: an affair, Why is that the first thing that came

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Speaker 4: to your mind.

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Speaker 2: I'm thinking it's either like the little bit of conspiracy

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Speaker 2: behind it of going like.

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Speaker 4: Really, I just can see through it a little bit more.

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Speaker 4: Some people are really like divisive when it comes to that.

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Speaker 4: But then the other part of me goes, well, Coldplay

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Speaker 4: really isn't doing much at the moment, So that's great

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Speaker 4: publicity for them because they have done nothing but be

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Speaker 4: spoken about.

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Speaker 2: That song will go down in the like living books

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Speaker 2: of because of this. Yeah, so it's probably coldplay.

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Speaker 3: Do you reckon?

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Speaker 2: Something's got to be behind it.

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Speaker 4: Think of every single person in that entire stadium, and

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Speaker 4: they went for that. Like obviously it's not right what

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Speaker 4: they were doing. No, absolutely not, but like in that

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Speaker 4: entire stadium that they're the only ones doing it, Like,

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Speaker 4: come on, the whole thing with social media, and this

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Speaker 4: is where I'm coming from, the whole thing with social

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Speaker 4: media is now those people their lives are crippled.

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Speaker 2: They can't hide.

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Speaker 4: And this is where I go into like the warning

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Speaker 4: bells is like and I really hope that they're strong

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Speaker 4: enough to pull through with this, but like this is

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Speaker 4: where people take their own lives based on being shamed

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Speaker 4: this heavy on social media.

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Speaker 3: Remember the nurse at the where Princess Kate was, she

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Speaker 3: killed herself.

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Speaker 4: There's a court case now around that because that person

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Speaker 4: took their own life of being shamed on social media

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Speaker 4: and outed on that many platforms.

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Speaker 3: It's I don't know, I really understand. We put a

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Speaker 3: video on TikTok a while ago we were slammed on

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Speaker 3: It was the video around you taking your kids to

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Speaker 3: Gracie Abram Yeah, yeah, yeah, And the comments on TikTok

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Speaker 3: I even got an anti bullying message from TikTok about

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Speaker 3: this particular video that we put up, but rage. Honestly,

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Speaker 3: I can understand why people would feel attacked, especially if

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Speaker 3: it's personal insults and bullied online, Like I completely understand that.

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Speaker 3: I don't know what it is about me. I really

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Speaker 3: enjoyed it. I loved seeing all those comments come through

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Speaker 3: and seeing everyone argue with each other, like they were

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Speaker 3: the people that were agreeing, and there were the people

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Speaker 3: that were going kids shouldn't go to concerts blah blah.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah yeah, and they were all demographic other yeah,

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Speaker 4: and the demographic would have been so different.

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Speaker 3: Even my kids, They're like, Mummy, you upset, you're getting slammed.

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Speaker 3: I was like, no, I'm not upset in the slightest.

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Speaker 3: I'm really quite enjoying it. I didn't hide any of

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Speaker 3: those comments. I let them all.

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Speaker 2: I'm not even on TikTok.

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Speaker 3: Even when TikTok said they do like a like they

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Speaker 3: quarantine certain comments that they think is going to be

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Speaker 3: offensive so that they're not publicly seen unless you allow

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Speaker 3: them to be publicly seen. I was like, ticking them all. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 3: at least that go for God. There is definitely an

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Speaker 3: element of it doesn't really feel real.

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Speaker 4: I feel like I could go on all day about

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Speaker 4: online bullying and people feeling the need to tell each

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Speaker 4: other to kill themselves.

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Speaker 2: Katie, it blows my mind. Why would anyone say that

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Speaker 2: to another human being?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, like you literally would not say that to somebody.

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Speaker 2: I just would person. I just wouldn't. I wouldn't say

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Speaker 2: it to anything.

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Speaker 4: But the whole thing is like this braveness, this harshness,

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Speaker 4: this key blake, worry is I really want to know

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Speaker 4: deep down, if we were sitting here in a one

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Speaker 4: on one situation, would you tell me to kill myself?

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Speaker 4: Because I can guarantee you people wouldn't. And this is

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Speaker 4: those kids at school and this inability of being able

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Speaker 4: to interact like this because I could tell you what

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Speaker 4: they say on these voice messages and these video messages

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Speaker 4: to each other with these horrific, horrific messages, they would

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Speaker 4: never say in person. Ever.

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Speaker 3: No, it is that element of not feeling like the

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Speaker 3: real people.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and this keyboard sort of like warrior, I'm gonna

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Speaker 4: hate on people like no other human being has the

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Speaker 4: right to tell another human being to go and kill themselves.

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Speaker 2: I find it horrific. Yeah, Like, and I really could

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Speaker 2: go on about this all day every day.

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Speaker 3: We shouldn't be. So this is something I heard something

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Speaker 3: along the lines of if someone can't change something in

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Speaker 3: thirty seconds, then don't say it to them. If you're

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Speaker 3: about to say something that someone can't change in thirty seconds,

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Speaker 3: then don't say it. Yeah, appearance, anything that you can't

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Speaker 3: change should not be said.

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Speaker 2: It's basically going with that whole like the nine seconds.

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Speaker 4: And I say like that, think before you speak, instead

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Speaker 4: of trying to control what the narrative is, or control

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Speaker 4: what people are saying about you, or control how others

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Speaker 4: are showing up, be the kind of change, meaning my actions,

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Speaker 4: be the positive change that I want to see in

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Speaker 4: others that I'm trying to control you to do and

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Speaker 4: say and be Yeah, do you know what I mean?

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Speaker 4: Like if we can try and take an element of

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Speaker 4: that and then help our kids with it, I think

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Speaker 4: that'd be like leaps and bounds in front of where

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Speaker 4: we are now at forty.

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Speaker 3: I also say to my kids whenever you feel the

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Speaker 3: need to say something nasty to someone, like if you've

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Speaker 3: seen something on TikTok whatever and you're wanting to send

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Speaker 3: a horrible comment. Yeah, think about what that's saying about you, Like,

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Speaker 3: what's going on with me? Yeah, to care enough about

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Speaker 3: what they've posted to comment something that's going to be mean? Yeah,

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Speaker 3: what is that saying about me? And how I feel

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Speaker 3: about myself? Yeah?

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Speaker 4: I lead with exactly that, And then an example would be,

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Speaker 4: how does that feel in your stomach for you with

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Speaker 4: that decision that you're making. So like, I get a

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Speaker 4: lot at the moment of Gracie coming home and going, mom,

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Speaker 4: this is happening at school, and I just don't know

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Speaker 4: what to think about it, and I just don't know

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Speaker 4: what to do, and I sort of go, Okay, let's

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Speaker 4: sit here with it. Sit here with this problem, I said,

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Speaker 4: And let's see how it feels like.

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Speaker 2: What does it feel like in your heart? What does

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Speaker 2: it feel like?

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Speaker 4: And you're tummy when you say exactly this scenario, and

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Speaker 4: she goes, it doesn't feel good, it doesn't sit well

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Speaker 4: with me. I said, Well that's usually.

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Speaker 2: The answer, babe.

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Speaker 4: No one can control who sits where, I said, because

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Speaker 4: that is mean gal behavior, I said, And do you

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Speaker 4: want to be within that mean gal behavior?

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Speaker 2: Is that who you truly are at your core?

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Speaker 4: And she's like no, And then so we lead on

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Speaker 4: the basis of feel like instead of thinking about the

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Speaker 4: logic part of the problem, we drop into so how

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Speaker 4: does it feel? What does it feel like in your heart?

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Speaker 4: What does it feel like in your tummy? Because kids actually,

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Speaker 4: like are so much more receptive to being able to

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Speaker 4: describe the feeling of a problem than they are of

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Speaker 4: the thinking of the resolution. I believe that's my opinion

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Speaker 4: because that's where I lead with my girls is go

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Speaker 4: to the feeling.

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Speaker 2: Feel how does this feel to you? But going back into.

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Speaker 4: That whole you and how you react online to people.

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Speaker 4: Do you know?

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Speaker 3: The other interesting thing to do as well is when

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Speaker 3: you see someone post something and your reaction.

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Speaker 2: Is that small part of your inside your Yeah, everyone's.

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Speaker 3: Wanting to comment. Is also going what that that person

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Speaker 3: has done or posted or has is making me wish

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Speaker 3: that I had? Is it something that's triggered me about

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Speaker 3: watching them do something that maybe I'm wanting more of

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Speaker 3: in my life. Yeah, that's an interesting one to like,

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Speaker 3: why is that annoying you? Is that annoying you because

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Speaker 3: that's where you want to be?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Is there something that they're doing that I should be

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Speaker 3: doing for myself?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and that's a great way of looking at again

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Speaker 4: going back to your own social media feed of like

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Speaker 4: not being afraid to cleansing your own Instagram.

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Speaker 2: It's just using Instagram for instance.

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Speaker 4: I don't understand TikTok, but like in terms of the

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Speaker 4: people that you are following, like in the present moment,

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Speaker 4: are they bringing you joy and constructive sort of like

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Speaker 4: oh yes, like is it lighting you up?

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Speaker 2: Or is it dimming your light?

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Speaker 4: And then if you're at a stage where it's dimming

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Speaker 4: your light instead of lighting you up, it might mean

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Speaker 4: that you don't have to go in and unfollow everyone,

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Speaker 4: but you could just go in and mute it for now,

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Speaker 4: just put yourself on a hiatus, like a brain.

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Speaker 3: Did this, right? I did this with the Kardashians, right.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I recognized that I was getting annoyed seeing some of

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Speaker 3: their posts. So I sat with that, and when why

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Speaker 3: am I getting annoyed at seeing some of their posts?

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Speaker 3: I'm getting annoyed because I want a new car, I

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Speaker 3: want nice things, I want more money. And I sat

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Speaker 3: with that and I unfollowed them for a while, and

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Speaker 3: then I was like, Okay, cool, I'm ready to follow

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Speaker 3: them again because I actually find some of the content

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Speaker 3: sometimes interesting, and now it's more, Oh that looks like

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Speaker 3: a nice place to go on holiday. Oh wow, that's

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Speaker 3: a beautiful beat, and I can now go okay, cool.

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Speaker 3: So I need to just probably work a bit harder

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Speaker 3: and be a bit kinder to myself and understand that

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Speaker 3: it's okay to want more.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, it's fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's the positive

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Speaker 2: out of it.

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Speaker 3: But do something about it, Like I'm not going to sit.

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Speaker 2: On the behind it.

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Speaker 3: You go, oh, it's so unfair. Why aren't I going

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Speaker 3: on nice holidays?

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Speaker 2: Do you know? Because we could all do that. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, So that's the example of I felt like I

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Speaker 3: needed to unfollow them. It wasn't making me feel good. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: but it wasn't making me feel good about myself. It

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Speaker 3: was nothing to do with them.

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Speaker 4: No disrespect to Kardashians, of course, but realistic. Yeah, it's

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Speaker 4: not real life, and it's not real our lives.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, do you know what I mean?

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Speaker 4: We can still find beautiful beaches and we can still

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Speaker 4: do all of that. But like for me, naturally, I

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Speaker 4: don't follow that because I don't look and go, wow,

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Speaker 4: you inspire me to be a better person, You inspire

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Speaker 4: me to want to alter my habits within my own

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Speaker 4: life to be able to be you, because there's nothing

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Speaker 4: about you that I want to be, do you know

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Speaker 4: what I mean? That's a great thing at least you recognize.

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Speaker 4: And it's that first piece of recognition of going like,

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Speaker 4: oh yeah, no, see that doesn't feel.

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Speaker 2: Right right now, that's okay.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you might not have to completely cleanse the whole thing,

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Speaker 4: but just have the courage to mute the noise for now.

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Speaker 3: And what's interesting about that. I heard something that Kylie

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Speaker 3: Jenner said. This is a while ago, and she talked

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Speaker 3: about having everything. Basically, she was like, I still have

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Speaker 3: mental health issues that you do. I still get anxiety

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Speaker 3: like you do. The thing that differs for me gets

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Speaker 3: that I've got lots of money, and she said, and

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Speaker 3: that's exciting. For about ten minutes, she goes, I will

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Speaker 3: turn up to a house that's on for sale and

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Speaker 3: it's a mansion and it's beautiful and it's everything people

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Speaker 3: could dream of, and I buy it because I've got

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Speaker 3: enough money, and I'm excited for about ten minutes and

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Speaker 3: then I'm not excited. And I was like, that's such

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Speaker 3: an interesting thoughts anyone that's like Oh, they've got lots

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Speaker 3: of money, and wouldn't it be nice just to jump

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Speaker 3: on a plane if any day and you know, we

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Speaker 3: do today, let's go to Barbados. Just remember all the

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Speaker 3: things that are exciting for us, holidays that we've got booked,

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Speaker 3: dinners in nice restaurants, whatever it might be that you

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Speaker 3: get excited for and look forward to. If you could

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Speaker 3: do that any day of the week and money was

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Speaker 3: no object, it wouldn't be exciting.

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Speaker 4: No, it's a good way of looking at it. All

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Speaker 4: the money in the world won't buy happiness. We all

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Speaker 4: know that.

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Speaker 2: No.

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Speaker 4: Okay, people that just leaving the planet of their own choice,

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Speaker 4: that are usually very well off, they're things that I

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Speaker 4: look at and go but why.

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Speaker 2: Would they do that? Why would they take their own

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Speaker 2: life and they had all.

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Speaker 3: Of this because there's nothing to look forward to it.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, So what we're doing is trying to actually just

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Speaker 4: bring it back to a parenting perspective.

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Speaker 2: Help yourself to be able to help others.

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Speaker 4: Help yourself first, put your life jacket on before putting

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Speaker 4: on other people's life jackets.

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Speaker 2: I actually really hate