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Speaker 1: Good a team. So do you ever think about You

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Speaker 1: probably do, because you listen to me a bit, most

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Speaker 1: of you do. But do you ever think about how

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Speaker 1: you think and why you think the way that you think?

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Speaker 1: Do you ever think about how come you see the

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Speaker 1: world the way that you see the world. Why do

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Speaker 1: you have the perspective that you have, the ideas that

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Speaker 1: you have, the attitudes that you have. Do you think

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Speaker 1: about where your beliefs came from? Do you ever have

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Speaker 1: a moment of awareness of your own programming? The fact

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Speaker 1: that from the day that you were born, you know,

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Speaker 1: you've had all this data and inverted commas punched into

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Speaker 1: your hard drive. You've had all these experiences, all these humans.

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Speaker 1: You've lived in this house, you've been to these schools,

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Speaker 1: You've gone to this church or synagogue or Moss Score

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Speaker 1: Temple or Scout Hall or park or beach or and

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Speaker 1: you've had this never ending series of conversations and interactions

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Speaker 1: and experiences and relationships and dialogues and disappointments and breakthroughs

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Speaker 1: and breakdowns and laughter and tears, and the never endingness

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Speaker 1: of the conscious experience that is your life. And in

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Speaker 1: the middle of all of that, that kind of doing

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Speaker 1: and being and conversing and living and thriving and surviving

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Speaker 1: and ducking and weaving and getting up and going to

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Speaker 1: bed and doing a bunch of stuff in the middle

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Speaker 1: of it, and making friends and losing friends, and in

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Speaker 1: the middle of all of that. Until this point in

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Speaker 1: time when you listen to this, you've been programmed. And

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Speaker 1: I've been programmed. I've been programmed by my world. I've

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Speaker 1: been programmed by my experiences. I've been programmed by my parents.

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Speaker 1: I've been programmed by my friends and my peers, my colleagues,

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Speaker 1: my business partners that I've had, the people that I've

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Speaker 1: looked up to, the problems and the problematic people that

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Speaker 1: I've dealt with, have influenced the way that I think

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Speaker 1: and respond and choose friends and cope under pressure. The

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Speaker 1: work that I've done, the companies that I've worked with,

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Speaker 1: the teams that I've worked with, the elite athletes that

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Speaker 1: I've worked with, the addicts and alcoholics, the people in

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Speaker 1: prison that I've worked with, the people with all kinds

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Speaker 1: of abilities and disabilities that I've worked with, have all

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Speaker 1: shaped me. They've influenced how I think. They've influenced everything

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Speaker 1: from my self belief to my level of awareness and

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Speaker 1: gratitude for for what I have. It's interesting that on

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Speaker 1: many levels I didn't choose to be how I am today.

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Speaker 1: On some levels, yes, but on some levels no. And

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Speaker 1: the same with you. You just are how you are and

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Speaker 1: the way that you are today. And this is not

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Speaker 1: a good or bad thing. This is an awareness thing,

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Speaker 1: a curiosity thing, the way that you are today if

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Speaker 1: science is to be believed, and fucking that's fraught with danger,

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Speaker 1: isn't it. But let's just say it's kind of right then.

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Speaker 1: About twenty percent fifteen twenty twenty five maybe percent of

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Speaker 1: how you are, how you think, how you choose your

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Speaker 1: all of the emotional, psychological, behavioral, and physiological components that

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Speaker 1: make you you. A small ish percentage of that is

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Speaker 1: genetic and inherent and unavoidable, but a big part of

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Speaker 1: how you are and who you are, and how you

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Speaker 1: think and how you operate and even even what your

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Speaker 1: body functions like. So much of that is about you

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Speaker 1: and your experiences and where you've been and what you've

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Speaker 1: seen and what you've done and what you haven't done.

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Speaker 1: And so I guess the questions that I'm asking in

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Speaker 1: this around this idea of recognizing our own programming for

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Speaker 1: what it is good or bad. Some of it's good,

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Speaker 1: some of it empowers us. But some of our programming

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Speaker 1: which results in certain beliefs and certain ways of thinking

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Speaker 1: and choosing and being and doing and existing on a

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Speaker 1: social level, on an emotional, on a psychological, on a spiritual,

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Speaker 1: perhaps on a financial, on a practical, on a physical level,

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Speaker 1: some of those things, some of those habits and behaviors

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Speaker 1: and ways of operating that are a byproduct of our

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Speaker 1: programming service, and some of us get in the way

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Speaker 1: of our potential and our possibilities. So the questions that

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Speaker 1: I've been asking myself and others for a bunch of years,

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Speaker 1: feel free to take notes, feel free to come back.

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Speaker 1: This is a kind of me thinking out loudish with

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Speaker 1: not too many notes in front of me about twenty

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Speaker 1: dot points I've got written, and by that I mean

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Speaker 1: twenty words on my screen in front of me. The

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Speaker 1: kind of questions that I ask people is really simple

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Speaker 1: things like is your current operating system working? What does

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Speaker 1: that mean? It means is the way that you typically

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Speaker 1: do stuff? Does it work for you? And by does

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Speaker 1: it work for you, I mean is it producing the

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Speaker 1: outcomes you want it to produce. Is the way that

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Speaker 1: you are currently doing life or a particular part of

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Speaker 1: your life, whether it's relationships or work or money, whether

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Speaker 1: or not it's spirituality, whether or not it's managing your

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Speaker 1: mental and emotional health, whether or not it's it's renovating

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Speaker 1: your physiology for the better, whether or not it's building

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Speaker 1: a business or a career or an academic kind of

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Speaker 1: endeavor that you're pursuing. Is the way that you are

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Speaker 1: currently doing that thing working. Now, it's mostly going to

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Speaker 1: be a yes or no answer. It might be a

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Speaker 1: kind of or it might be a partially. But once

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Speaker 1: we know if something that we are typically doing is

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Speaker 1: working or not working, then that gives us clear indication

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Speaker 1: as to whether or not we should one continue to

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Speaker 1: do that, to discontinue doing it, or three continue doing

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Speaker 1: it in a way that's somewhat modified or more likely

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Speaker 1: to produce better outcomes. Do your typical thoughts empower you

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Speaker 1: or limit you? Why do you think the way that

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Speaker 1: you do? Is that you thinking critically? That is what

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Speaker 1: I call clean slate thinking. That is no influence from

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Speaker 1: anyone or anything else. This is just you. I know.

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Speaker 1: This is very difficult. But do you think the way

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Speaker 1: that you think about this thing because you've simply adopted

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Speaker 1: and adapted thinking and believing in perspective and ideology from

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Speaker 1: someone else. Or is the way that you think about

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Speaker 1: whatever fill in the blank, is the way that you

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Speaker 1: feel about X, we'll call it X? Is that all you?

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Speaker 1: Is that all you? Or is that nearly zero you? Like?

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Speaker 1: Where did that thinking come from? Does it serve you?

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Speaker 1: Does it sabotage you? Does it propel you forward or back?

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Speaker 1: Or does it keep you trapped in some kind of

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Speaker 1: psychological emotional behavioral holding pattern? Where did your beliefs, the

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Speaker 1: things that you believe, where did they come from? Did

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Speaker 1: you choose them? Because if you didn't use them, they

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Speaker 1: ain't yours, there's someone else's. And maybe over time you

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Speaker 1: might do an audit on your beliefs, or you might

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Speaker 1: do a deep dive into where that came from and

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Speaker 1: whether or not that belief actually is truly representative of

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Speaker 1: or aligned with what you think and how you think,

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Speaker 1: And you might circle back and go, you know what, actually,

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Speaker 1: I do believe that I do on my own independently,

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Speaker 1: when I've held that up to I've put that belief

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Speaker 1: up on the old cognitive hoist, and I've walked around

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Speaker 1: it and kicked the tires, and I've come to the

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Speaker 1: conclusion that I actually do think that's true. But there

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Speaker 1: are so many things that we believe that we didn't choose,

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Speaker 1: and those beliefs are essentially just a byproduct of proximity

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Speaker 1: of other people's thoughts or what I call I don't

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Speaker 1: know if anyone else calls it cognitive osmosis. That is,

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Speaker 1: our thoughts and our data processing and our thinking and

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Speaker 1: our worldview simply becomes a version of the people that

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Speaker 1: influence us the most. Are you wasting your potential or

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Speaker 1: optimizing your potential? If you're wasting it, how are you

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Speaker 1: wasting it? And why are you wasting it? Then? What

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Speaker 1: is one thing that you could do to start to

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Speaker 1: use your potential rather than put it in the bottom drawer.

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Speaker 1: What is a better use of your time? What is

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Speaker 1: a better use of your talent? What is the better

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Speaker 1: use of your energy? How can you take that potential

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Speaker 1: and turn it into something great or something worthwhile or

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Speaker 1: something valuable. What kind of practice all outcomes can you

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Speaker 1: produce with that potential? And what's stopping you? What's getting

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Speaker 1: in the way. What about your habits? What about your

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Speaker 1: habits around food and exercise and lifestyle. There's some obvious ones.

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Speaker 1: Are those habits making you better? Are they making you better?

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Speaker 1: Are they a positive? Are they making your life better?

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Speaker 1: Are you consciously designing, creating, and inhabiting your ideal life?

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Speaker 1: Are you doing that consciously or are you an unconscious

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Speaker 1: passenger in your own life being kind of controlled and

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Speaker 1: programmed and determined by external forces and influences. So, when

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Speaker 1: you think about consciously creating your own best life, whatever

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Speaker 1: that means for you, based on I guess your values

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Speaker 1: and goals and wants, what needs to change for that

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Speaker 1: to happen. Are you being swept along by the energy

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Speaker 1: and momentum of everything and everyone around you? Or are

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Speaker 1: you consciously and courageously choosing your path and purpose every day?

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Speaker 1: Because here's what's happened. Here's what happens when we live unconsciously.

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Speaker 1: We blink and then we're five years older. We blink,

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Speaker 1: it's twenty twenty nine. We blink. We're doing the same

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Speaker 1: thing that we were doing. We're having the same conversation,

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Speaker 1: the same internal dialogue. We're doing the same dumb shit

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Speaker 1: we're making the same dumb excuses. We're still waiting for

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Speaker 1: a fucking miracle or some kind of magic or some

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Speaker 1: kind of you know, ethereal spiritual sign from somewhere or

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Speaker 1: someone or something. What we're not doing is we're not

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Speaker 1: taking control of our choices and our behaviors and our existence.

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Speaker 1: We are hoping that things will work out. We have

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Speaker 1: brought into the bullshit that things will work out if

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Speaker 1: you're a good person, it'll all end up. Okay, guess

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Speaker 1: what doesn't happen. It doesn't happen accidentally. You'll build your

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Speaker 1: best life or you'll be a passenger in the life

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Speaker 1: that just happens to you and around you. So I've

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Speaker 1: got some thoughts for you around this, and number one

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Speaker 1: is to question everything that you're currently doing. So think

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Speaker 1: about the thing I'm talking about, the big things, the

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Speaker 1: typical things that you're doing. And then off the back

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Speaker 1: of that, why am I doing this, this thing that

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Speaker 1: I do a lot, this thing that I consistently do,

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Speaker 1: why do I do it? Why do I do it?

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Speaker 1: And does it work based on who and how I

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Speaker 1: want to be? Is it optimal this thing that I'm doing?

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Speaker 1: Does it make my life better? Or is it fucking

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Speaker 1: my life up? Is it fucking my relationships? Up? Is

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Speaker 1: it fucking my health up? Is it fucking my mental health? Up?

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Speaker 1: Does it make me more anxious? Am I spending money

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Speaker 1: on shit I don't need? Am I eating food I

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Speaker 1: don't need? Am I seeking attention that I don't need?

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Speaker 1: What am I currently doing? That is a form of

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Speaker 1: self sabotage? What am I currently doing that doesn't work?

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Speaker 1: And how can I do better? And what can I

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Speaker 1: do better? What do I need to stop doing? What

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Speaker 1: do I need to start doing more of? Consider which

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Speaker 1: of your current thoughts and beliefs and habits might be

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Speaker 1: standing between you and your growth, you and your purpose,

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Speaker 1: you and your happiness, You and your best life. I'm

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Speaker 1: going to use that as a global term. Best life

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Speaker 1: means something different to you than it does to me

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Speaker 1: and everyone else listening. There might be some convergence of ideas,

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Speaker 1: but there might be a lot of divergence. It doesn't matter.

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Speaker 1: I'm just talking about so for me, part of my

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Speaker 1: best life is working for me is not having a

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Speaker 1: boss's is not having the structure and rules of living

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Speaker 1: in someone else's work or commercial paradigm. That's great for me,

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Speaker 1: but it might be terrible for you. So when I

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Speaker 1: talk about your best life, that's based on your values

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Speaker 1: and your goals and your story about what success is.

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Speaker 1: So let me go back to what I said before,

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Speaker 1: that that is, consider which of your current thoughts, beliefs,

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Speaker 1: and habits, so, in other words, what you are doing

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Speaker 1: right now, typically consider which of those might be standing

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Speaker 1: between you and your growth, you and your purpose, you

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Speaker 1: and your happiness, and you and your best life. And

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Speaker 1: think about, think about go back to all of those

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Speaker 1: beliefs that you didn't choose, those ones that are a

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Speaker 1: byproduct of proximity and cognitive osmosis, and that whole idea

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Speaker 1: of just becoming a version of somebody else rather than

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Speaker 1: you being you. Taking on the thinking, the ideas, and

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Speaker 1: the attitudes of those around you doesn't mean you can't

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Speaker 1: learn from others, doesn't mean that that's something great can't

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Speaker 1: metaphorically rub off. But at the same time, you can't

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Speaker 1: be them. You can only be you. And when you

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Speaker 1: are a version of somebody else, invariably things will end

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Speaker 1: in tears, metaphoric tears or literal tears. So perhaps open

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Speaker 1: yourself up to the idea or ideas that one you

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Speaker 1: might be wrong about something that you really don't want

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Speaker 1: to be wrong about. Think about that, Think about the

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Speaker 1: idea that you might currently believe something or want something

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Speaker 1: to be true, or think a certain way about a

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Speaker 1: thing that is perhaps a flawed idea or an untrue

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Speaker 1: truth in inverted commerce. And one of the challenges for

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Speaker 1: us is that in a world where everyone gets things wrong,

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Speaker 1: everyone makes mistakes, everyone makes erroneous assumptions, everyone has beliefs

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Speaker 1: that are flawed, everyone gets disappointed, But none of us

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Speaker 1: want to be wrong. None of us want to be wrong.

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Speaker 1: And I don't think that we need to want to

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Speaker 1: be wrong, but I think we need to be okay

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Speaker 1: with it, because when I'm not open to the idea

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Speaker 1: or comfortable with the idea or okay with the idea,

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Speaker 1: that I'm going to get things wrong. And some of

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Speaker 1: the things that I get wrong will be things that

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Speaker 1: currently form part of my worldview, part of my strongly

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Speaker 1: held belief part of my version of reality, part of

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Speaker 1: my version of the truth. And when I believe something strongly,

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Speaker 1: then that thing that I believe strongly shapes my identity,

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Speaker 1: how I see the world and how I see me

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Speaker 1: in the world. Now when my identity and a particular

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Speaker 1: belief or idea or ideology or philosophy or theology, when

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Speaker 1: they are intertwined, then I don't want to be wrong.

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Speaker 1: And it doesn't matter quite often for people what data

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Speaker 1: or information they are presented with. They will push back,

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Speaker 1: not through logic and not because they happen to be right,

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Speaker 1: but they will push back because they are emotional, they

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Speaker 1: are scared, and they do not want to entertain the

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Speaker 1: idea that this thing that I've believed or thought for

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Speaker 1: a very long time could be wrong, because that's fucking terrifying.

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Speaker 1: Because if that thing that I've thought for a long

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Speaker 1: time is wrong, then I don't know who I am.

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Speaker 1: I don't know what is up and down because my

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Speaker 1: identity and that belief are kind of one and the same.

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Speaker 1: We need to open ourselves up to the idea that

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Speaker 1: we are going to be wrong and now and then

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Speaker 1: it's going to be something profound, something that we really

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Speaker 1: struggle to accept. But nonetheless, it doesn't mean we're right,

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Speaker 1: and it doesn't mean that being wrong makes you a

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Speaker 1: bad human. It makes you human. You and I will

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Speaker 1: need to unlearn some things, and even in the context

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Speaker 1: of being in a certain group, changing your mind, changing

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Speaker 1: your thinking, changing your beliefs and behaviors. That's going to

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Speaker 1: ruffle some feathers depending on the group. That's going to

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Speaker 1: piss some people off. That's going to destroy some relationships. Sometimes.

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Speaker 1: I know I've done this. I've been in groups where

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Speaker 1: to think a certain way and believe a certain way,

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Speaker 1: and have a certain ideology or philosophy or theology, or

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Speaker 1: set of behaviors or practices or rules. It's a lot,

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Speaker 1: isn't it. That was non negotiable. And so when I

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Speaker 1: would put up my hand and go, oh, I'm not

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Speaker 1: sure that I agree with that, it's like, well, you

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Speaker 1: need to agree. You need to get in line or

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Speaker 1: get out. And so when you're in a group that

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Speaker 1: says you need to get in line, you need to conform,

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Speaker 1: you need to fit in. You need to believe, you

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Speaker 1: need to not question, you need to comply. You need

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Speaker 1: to kind of believe what we tell you to believe.

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Speaker 1: We don't want you to We don't want to teach

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Speaker 1: you how to think. We want to teach you what

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Speaker 1: to think. In fact, you thinking critically and arriving at

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Speaker 1: your own conclusions and beliefs and ideas and truths. Well,

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Speaker 1: that's just delusional and you can't belong. But the reality

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Speaker 1: is for you and me, it's not your job to

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Speaker 1: be like them. Now that doesn't mean you can't belong

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Speaker 1: to a group. But if you belong to any group

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Speaker 1: where you can't have your own opinion or ideas, or

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Speaker 1: you can't disagree, or you can't push back. And I'm

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Speaker 1: not talking about being problematic or being difficult. I'm talking

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Speaker 1: about being in any kind of group, not necessarily religious,

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Speaker 1: but any kind of group where your divergence of opinion

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Speaker 1: or ideas or belief or thinking where that is not

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Speaker 1: welcome or not embraced or not tolerated. Then you, my friend,

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Speaker 1: are in a cult occult of thoughts. And yes, it

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Speaker 1: might be religious, or it might be political, or it

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Speaker 1: might be sporting, or it might be nutritional, or it

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Speaker 1: doesn't matter. But I'm not talking about religion per se.

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Speaker 1: I'm talking about the way that people endeavor to control

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Speaker 1: and manipulate and coerce and manage and even intimidate people

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Speaker 1: into thinking a certain way. Fuck that, and some of

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Speaker 1: you know exactly what I'm talking about. By the way,

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Speaker 1: the group could be a family, the group could be

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Speaker 1: ten people at work. The group could be a sporting club.

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Speaker 1: The group could be a bunch of people that have

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Speaker 1: dinner every Friday night that are in inverted Comma's friends.

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Speaker 1: And you sit there biting your fucking tongue every Friday

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Speaker 1: night because you don't want people to know what you

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Speaker 1: really think about some of their bullshit, and so rather

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Speaker 1: than be you, you conform. But guess what, when you

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Speaker 1: don't be you, and when you conform, you're compromising in

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Speaker 1: a way which is terrible for your own growth, your

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Speaker 1: own development, your own ability to live in alignment with

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Speaker 1: your values and be that authentic person. For some of us,

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Speaker 1: it's really time to open ourselves to the idea of

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Speaker 1: having different conversations with different people. Talk about programming, talk

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Speaker 1: about deprogramming, talking about how to just expose ourselves to

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Speaker 1: different ideas, different culture, you know, to have new experiences,

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Speaker 1: to do new things, to be less self less, self

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Speaker 1: righteous and afraid and more curious. Like the truth is,

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Speaker 1: you don't even know what you don't know, as don't I.

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Speaker 1: We don't know what we don't know of all there

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Speaker 1: is to know. And I know this is an obvious thing.

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Speaker 1: But if all there is to know is an ocean

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Speaker 1: of knowledge, an ocean of information and awareness. Then me,

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Speaker 1: who's been learning for sixty years, I know a drop.

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Speaker 1: I know a one single drop in an ocean of knowledge,

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Speaker 1: and so on no level can I be or do

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Speaker 1: I have the right to be presumptuous or arrogant or

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Speaker 1: self righteous about what I know or what I think.

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Speaker 1: I know. There's nothing wrong with believing, there's nothing wrong

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Speaker 1: with thinking, you know, there's nothing wrong with having attitudes

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Speaker 1: and ideas, of course, of course, but I need to

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Speaker 1: be brave enough and grown up enough, and self aware

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Speaker 1: enough and humble enough to know that some of the

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Speaker 1: things that I think and believe and even teach periodically

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Speaker 1: are going to be wrong. They're going to be I'm

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Speaker 1: just going to fuck up. I'm going to have good intentions,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to believe I'm right, but one day I'm

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Speaker 1: going to find out I'm wrong. And I've been finding

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Speaker 1: out I'm wrong forever. Sometimes I get it right, sometimes

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Speaker 1: I don't. But if I don't teach or talk or

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Speaker 1: coach or help or serve until I know everything and

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Speaker 1: I'm right about everything, then I'll never leave the fucking house,

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Speaker 1: because I'm never going to be that person. Neither is anyone.

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Speaker 1: By the way, all of the self proclaimed in inverted commas,

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Speaker 1: alleged gurus and experts get shit wrong constantly. They just

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Speaker 1: have better branding and marketing than you and me. That's it.

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Speaker 1: Do you think that high profile, famous, rich, well respected

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Speaker 1: people don't fuck up twenty thirty times a day. They

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Speaker 1: sure do, and it's okay as they should. That doesn't

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Speaker 1: bother me that the experts fuck up. It doesn't bother me.

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Speaker 1: It bothers me, doesn't really bother me. I just don't

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Speaker 1: like the fact that they present themselves as having it

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Speaker 1: all figured out. It ain't true. So maybe think about

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Speaker 1: your day to day rituals, rules and habits, like the

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Speaker 1: stuff that you typically do most days of your life.

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Speaker 1: So what are the rituals and rules and habits and

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Speaker 1: predictable behaviors that you execute daily that don't fucking work? Right?

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Speaker 1: We can't change what we can't acknowledge, we can't get

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Speaker 1: good at what we won't do. And if we're putting

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Speaker 1: our head in the metaphoric sand and pretending that we

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Speaker 1: are not the problem, someone else or something else is

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Speaker 1: always the problem. Yes, there'll be external variables, and there'll

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Speaker 1: be people in your life periodically, who are pricks? You

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Speaker 1: know that's going to happen. We get that, but also,

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Speaker 1: you know, we also hear about people who have got

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Speaker 1: amazingly tough challenges, but in the middle of those tough

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Speaker 1: challenges they just find a way. And I've spoken about

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Speaker 1: many of those people. I'm not going to talk about

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Speaker 1: them again. But you know, my day today, life is

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Speaker 1: a fucking Disney movie compared to some of my friends,

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Speaker 1: some of my friends who have got what I call

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Speaker 1: real problems. I don't have real problems. I have bullshit problems.

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Speaker 1: But it's important for us to think about what are

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Speaker 1: the things that we typically do day to day rituals, rules, habits,

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Speaker 1: behaviors that are not working for us, and why we

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Speaker 1: keep doing them. Think about the things that you do

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Speaker 1: in terms of, for example, money, the way that you spend,

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Speaker 1: the way that you manage money. Is it working. Do

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Speaker 1: you spend money that you don't need to on things

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00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:09,680
Speaker 1: that you absolutely don't really need while simultaneously struggling financially.

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Speaker 1: Think about the way that you work. Think about your career.

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Speaker 1: Think about your job. Think about all the variables that

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Speaker 1: go under the banner of my career. The way that

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00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:26,199
Speaker 1: you act and interact, the way that you create an

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00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:28,959
Speaker 1: accountability list every day, to do list every day, the

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Speaker 1: way that you execute your level of professionalism, the way

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Speaker 1: that you communicate, interact and connect with the people in

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Speaker 1: the proximity of you at work. Think about I won't

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Speaker 1: bang on about this, but what you do to your

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Speaker 1: body and what you put in your body, is it working. Yes.

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Speaker 1: We can go into all the nuance and all the variables,

401
00:27:51,440 --> 00:27:53,600
Speaker 1: and we can do a deep dive into the science

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00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:57,080
Speaker 1: of everything. But you know, like you have an instinctive

403
00:27:57,080 --> 00:28:01,640
Speaker 1: and intuitive, a natural knowledge and understanding that you are

404
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:06,639
Speaker 1: doing shit right now which doesn't align with the optimal

405
00:28:06,720 --> 00:28:09,000
Speaker 1: version of physical health or how you want to be,

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00:28:09,119 --> 00:28:11,000
Speaker 1: or how you want to feel or how you want

407
00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:13,480
Speaker 1: to operate. Maybe you don't, but I would think most

408
00:28:13,480 --> 00:28:17,680
Speaker 1: of you do. Are you currently doing something to your body,

409
00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:22,040
Speaker 1: or putting something in your body, or not doing something

410
00:28:22,080 --> 00:28:24,760
Speaker 1: for your body, as the case may be, that is

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00:28:26,640 --> 00:28:30,119
Speaker 1: putting you in a place of disadvantage that is not

412
00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:34,520
Speaker 1: adding to the quality of your life. Recognize it, make

413
00:28:34,560 --> 00:28:38,640
Speaker 1: a decision about it. Change it. Oh, it's not that easy,

414
00:28:38,680 --> 00:28:41,240
Speaker 1: and it's not easy. Never said it's fucking easy. In fact,

415
00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:44,720
Speaker 1: I'm always saying it's hard. I'm always saying it's difficult.

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00:28:44,840 --> 00:28:47,320
Speaker 1: I'm always saying we've got to climb the fucking hill.

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00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:51,840
Speaker 1: I'm always saying it's inconvenient and uncomfortable. I'm always saying that.

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Speaker 1: So don't say to me, oh but it's not. Yes,

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00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:58,600
Speaker 1: it's fucking hard. Do it anyway? Do it anyway? Think

420
00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:03,520
Speaker 1: about your day to day operating system, rules, rituals, etc.

421
00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:08,040
Speaker 1: Around mental and emotional self regulation. What are the things

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00:29:08,040 --> 00:29:10,360
Speaker 1: that you are doing on a daily basis that are

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00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:15,920
Speaker 1: good for your mental health? What are the things that

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00:29:15,960 --> 00:29:21,040
Speaker 1: you are doing typically and repeatedly that maybe are bad

425
00:29:21,160 --> 00:29:24,600
Speaker 1: for your mental health? Are you obsessing about and focusing

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00:29:24,640 --> 00:29:27,719
Speaker 1: on and wasting a huge amount of time and energy

427
00:29:28,040 --> 00:29:31,840
Speaker 1: on things that you can't control, and that the end

428
00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:34,959
Speaker 1: result of that five ten, fifteen, twenty minute kind of

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00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:37,840
Speaker 1: cognitive rabbit hole of fucking stress and wow w W

430
00:29:38,400 --> 00:29:43,800
Speaker 1: the end of that is you in a state of anxiety. Conversely,

431
00:29:45,040 --> 00:29:47,160
Speaker 1: maybe you can do some stuff that is going to

432
00:29:47,840 --> 00:29:53,600
Speaker 1: turn on your parasympathetic nervous system that calm the farm.

433
00:29:53,720 --> 00:29:56,840
Speaker 1: Maybe there are some breathing exercises, Maybe it's working out,

434
00:29:56,880 --> 00:29:59,440
Speaker 1: Maybe it's meditating. Maybe it's lying with your dog on

435
00:29:59,480 --> 00:30:02,920
Speaker 1: the floor. Maybe it's just speaking out loud things that

436
00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:06,800
Speaker 1: you're worried about, and it's just in the acknowledgment that, oh,

437
00:30:06,840 --> 00:30:10,680
Speaker 1: my god, it's all right. One of the things that's

438
00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:15,520
Speaker 1: worked for me in terms of minimizing with certain areas

439
00:30:16,520 --> 00:30:18,920
Speaker 1: anxiety and overthinking and self doubt and all of that

440
00:30:19,080 --> 00:30:23,120
Speaker 1: was for me to literally articulate on this show all

441
00:30:23,240 --> 00:30:27,840
Speaker 1: my own bullshit, and me talking about my flaws and faults,

442
00:30:28,360 --> 00:30:32,120
Speaker 1: me talking about my shortcomings, me talking about my failures

443
00:30:32,160 --> 00:30:36,360
Speaker 1: and periodic successes. All of that for me has actually

444
00:30:36,440 --> 00:30:40,400
Speaker 1: been therapeutic. It's actually been good for my mental and

445
00:30:40,440 --> 00:30:47,240
Speaker 1: emotional health because I'm closer to the authentic me, the

446
00:30:47,280 --> 00:30:51,320
Speaker 1: person not the persona that I have at times in

447
00:30:51,360 --> 00:30:55,360
Speaker 1: my career pushed the persona out to the public, which

448
00:30:55,400 --> 00:30:59,800
Speaker 1: is a version of me that at times was not

449
00:31:00,440 --> 00:31:07,920
Speaker 1: one hundred authentic. Think about in terms of your day

450
00:31:07,960 --> 00:31:13,640
Speaker 1: to day rituals, your personal growth endeavors who you want

451
00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:20,160
Speaker 1: to become. Think about lifelong learning. Think about how you

452
00:31:20,200 --> 00:31:23,520
Speaker 1: can optimize your time and energy that I spoke about

453
00:31:23,520 --> 00:31:26,960
Speaker 1: a minute ago to be more effective and productive, Be

454
00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:34,400
Speaker 1: more strategic. Think clearly about what you want. You can

455
00:31:34,440 --> 00:31:38,200
Speaker 1: be driven by your emotions, but regulated and guided by

456
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:42,840
Speaker 1: logic and strategy and critical thinking. This is the thing

457
00:31:42,920 --> 00:31:45,719
Speaker 1: I really really want that call? How do I create that?

458
00:31:46,280 --> 00:31:48,760
Speaker 1: What's my timeline, what's my plan, what's my strategy? What's

459
00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:53,000
Speaker 1: my accountability is I've said countless times some people have

460
00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:55,800
Speaker 1: listened to me thousands of times and are still not

461
00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:59,240
Speaker 1: doing any of the things that they know are true

462
00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:03,560
Speaker 1: for them, Which is why I say all the time,

463
00:32:03,560 --> 00:32:06,360
Speaker 1: I can't change anyone. I can only change now. I

464
00:32:06,360 --> 00:32:11,840
Speaker 1: can influence and talk and educate and inspire. Sometimes and

465
00:32:11,880 --> 00:32:15,240
Speaker 1: some people will say, harps, I listened to this podcast

466
00:32:15,240 --> 00:32:17,920
Speaker 1: that I'm doing right now. I'll get feedback from people saying,

467
00:32:18,920 --> 00:32:22,040
Speaker 1: thank you. I really needed to hear that I had

468
00:32:22,040 --> 00:32:23,840
Speaker 1: a light bulb, I did this thing. Blah blah blah

469
00:32:23,840 --> 00:32:28,880
Speaker 1: blah blah. And some people may but I would think

470
00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:30,719
Speaker 1: based on the numbers of people that listen, there might

471
00:32:30,760 --> 00:32:32,719
Speaker 1: be a few. But some people will listen to this

472
00:32:32,760 --> 00:32:35,400
Speaker 1: and not because of me, but because they're ready, but

473
00:32:35,560 --> 00:32:38,360
Speaker 1: because they do the work, but because they make the decision,

474
00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:41,719
Speaker 1: but because they get uncomfortable, because they lean into whatever

475
00:32:42,080 --> 00:32:46,920
Speaker 1: needs to be lent into They do it as a

476
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:51,720
Speaker 1: byproduct of intersecting with this podcast. But still I'm not

477
00:32:51,880 --> 00:32:54,120
Speaker 1: doing it because I'm not doing the work. I'm not

478
00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:57,400
Speaker 1: getting uncomfortable, I'm not making the effort, I'm not taking

479
00:32:57,400 --> 00:33:02,360
Speaker 1: the risks. I'm not doing any of it. How many

480
00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:05,120
Speaker 1: times do we need to hear a version of And

481
00:33:05,160 --> 00:33:07,240
Speaker 1: by the way, none of what I'm saying today is new.

482
00:33:07,600 --> 00:33:13,000
Speaker 1: I didn't invent any of this. All of these ideas

483
00:33:13,040 --> 00:33:18,480
Speaker 1: and thoughts and messages are spoken about daily by probably

484
00:33:18,560 --> 00:33:22,000
Speaker 1: thousands or millions of people around the world, where we

485
00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:24,080
Speaker 1: question what we do and why we do it, and

486
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:25,800
Speaker 1: how we do it and whether or not it's working,

487
00:33:26,120 --> 00:33:28,719
Speaker 1: and we think about our programming, and we think about

488
00:33:29,040 --> 00:33:32,400
Speaker 1: critical thinking beyond the programming, and we start to become

489
00:33:32,480 --> 00:33:39,720
Speaker 1: aware of my potential, beyond the unconsciousness of my current existence,

490
00:33:39,760 --> 00:33:42,640
Speaker 1: where we think, Wow, what if I stepped out of

491
00:33:42,640 --> 00:33:47,960
Speaker 1: my unconscious operating system that groundhog danus of doing things

492
00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:52,400
Speaker 1: that don't work, and I stepped into ownership, and I

493
00:33:52,440 --> 00:33:57,720
Speaker 1: stepped into awareness, and I stepped into strength and courage,

494
00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:03,040
Speaker 1: and I made different decisions, not because I've got more

495
00:34:03,080 --> 00:34:05,400
Speaker 1: time in the day or not because it's easy now

496
00:34:05,480 --> 00:34:08,080
Speaker 1: or not because I've got a cheersquad, but just because

497
00:34:08,560 --> 00:34:15,400
Speaker 1: I just do it. What if what if I expose

498
00:34:15,480 --> 00:34:19,600
Speaker 1: myself to different ideas and I open the door on

499
00:34:19,680 --> 00:34:23,759
Speaker 1: different philosophies and teaching and theologies and texts and traditions

500
00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:27,480
Speaker 1: and cultures and people and environments. What if I see

501
00:34:27,520 --> 00:34:31,120
Speaker 1: different stuff? If I see more stuff, I hear more stuff,

502
00:34:31,160 --> 00:34:33,880
Speaker 1: I'd read more stuff, and I'd do more stuff. What

503
00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:38,600
Speaker 1: if I do that? What if I broaden my awareness

504
00:34:38,640 --> 00:34:44,480
Speaker 1: by just doing different things? What if I recognize the

505
00:34:44,600 --> 00:34:48,960
Speaker 1: gap between how I live day to day and my values?

506
00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:54,440
Speaker 1: And if my values are the road map for constructing

507
00:34:54,440 --> 00:34:59,760
Speaker 1: a life, a lifestyle and existence and an operating system

508
00:34:59,800 --> 00:35:05,120
Speaker 1: that works for me, then the obvious question is how

509
00:35:05,160 --> 00:35:08,359
Speaker 1: does my current behavior or way of living or being

510
00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:11,600
Speaker 1: and doing align with my values? And if the answer

511
00:35:11,680 --> 00:35:14,920
Speaker 1: is not very well, that's okay again, no self loathing,

512
00:35:15,080 --> 00:35:19,080
Speaker 1: just awareness. Cool. Well, I know what my values are,

513
00:35:19,560 --> 00:35:24,400
Speaker 1: so my values can now become the roadmap for future me,

514
00:35:25,520 --> 00:35:34,360
Speaker 1: for future decisions, for future behaviors, for future transformation, growth, learning, evolution, development.

515
00:35:35,480 --> 00:35:37,799
Speaker 1: What matters to me? Well, these are the things that

516
00:35:37,840 --> 00:35:41,480
Speaker 1: are most important. These are my goals, These are my values.

517
00:35:42,200 --> 00:35:45,960
Speaker 1: These are my standards, These things are my internal sat nav.

518
00:35:46,520 --> 00:35:50,840
Speaker 1: I defer to them when I am designing, refining, and

519
00:35:51,040 --> 00:35:54,799
Speaker 1: creating the best version of my life and me in

520
00:35:54,840 --> 00:35:59,759
Speaker 1: the middle of that. I think we need to get

521
00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:05,480
Speaker 1: our head around the idea that that our truth might

522
00:36:05,560 --> 00:36:12,719
Speaker 1: not be the truth, that the thing that's going on

523
00:36:14,400 --> 00:36:18,399
Speaker 1: is not the same as your story about the thing

524
00:36:18,440 --> 00:36:22,479
Speaker 1: that's going on. And your story about the thing that's

525
00:36:22,520 --> 00:36:27,359
Speaker 1: going on might be a product of the story that

526
00:36:27,440 --> 00:36:30,759
Speaker 1: you grew up in. It might be a byproduct of

527
00:36:30,840 --> 00:36:34,680
Speaker 1: the story that people in your world that you love

528
00:36:34,719 --> 00:36:37,399
Speaker 1: and respect and look up to and trust. It might

529
00:36:37,520 --> 00:36:42,279
Speaker 1: be that their story has become your story. But there's

530
00:36:42,280 --> 00:36:46,839
Speaker 1: still a chance that it's just a story. There's still

531
00:36:46,880 --> 00:36:50,759
Speaker 1: a chance that there's a chasm between the truth and

532
00:36:50,880 --> 00:37:00,280
Speaker 1: your truth. Maybe not in some cases and maybe in other's.

533
00:37:02,080 --> 00:37:04,239
Speaker 1: So I guess the challenge for us as we think

534
00:37:04,280 --> 00:37:07,239
Speaker 1: about this idea of becoming aware of our programming and

535
00:37:07,239 --> 00:37:09,719
Speaker 1: the way that you know our beliefs and ideas and

536
00:37:09,800 --> 00:37:13,200
Speaker 1: values and behaviors and outcomes, and the way that we

537
00:37:13,239 --> 00:37:16,800
Speaker 1: do personal and professional relationships, and the way that we

538
00:37:17,719 --> 00:37:23,760
Speaker 1: interpret the data that we're inundated with on a minutely

539
00:37:24,080 --> 00:37:29,040
Speaker 1: is that word on a minute by minute, hourly daily basis.

540
00:37:30,000 --> 00:37:34,560
Speaker 1: You know, once we start to identify things that are

541
00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:38,920
Speaker 1: working and not working, we can make different decisions. We

542
00:37:39,000 --> 00:37:42,880
Speaker 1: can change beliefs over time, we can change ideas and

543
00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:47,160
Speaker 1: behaviors and rituals and rules and habits and outcomes. And

544
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:50,520
Speaker 1: we're not going to change quickly. We're not going to

545
00:37:50,520 --> 00:37:52,759
Speaker 1: close our eyes and wake up and next Wednesday, we're

546
00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:55,759
Speaker 1: going to be a different human with a different reality.

547
00:37:56,120 --> 00:37:59,400
Speaker 1: It's a process. And it might not be ten things.

548
00:37:59,440 --> 00:38:03,080
Speaker 1: That might be one thing, It might be two or

549
00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:05,919
Speaker 1: three things. It might just be a key thing that

550
00:38:06,000 --> 00:38:10,480
Speaker 1: you need. It might just be that you change one

551
00:38:10,600 --> 00:38:15,400
Speaker 1: significant component of your life and a myriad of things

552
00:38:15,480 --> 00:38:19,480
Speaker 1: change because of that. I know many people who have

553
00:38:19,800 --> 00:38:21,480
Speaker 1: and this is going to be an obvious thing to say,

554
00:38:21,480 --> 00:38:26,520
Speaker 1: but it's true who the main thing that, the main

555
00:38:26,600 --> 00:38:30,520
Speaker 1: thing that they have done is just change their body

556
00:38:30,560 --> 00:38:33,759
Speaker 1: for the better. And I'm not talking about appearance or

557
00:38:33,800 --> 00:38:38,280
Speaker 1: shape or vanity or ego. I'm talking about they've changed

558
00:38:38,320 --> 00:38:42,520
Speaker 1: their body for the better in terms of health and

559
00:38:42,680 --> 00:38:48,399
Speaker 1: function and performance. And then when their body changes, when

560
00:38:48,400 --> 00:38:51,480
Speaker 1: they went through that process of thinking and doing and

561
00:38:51,560 --> 00:38:57,480
Speaker 1: being different and creating different outcomes and changing their physiology

562
00:38:57,560 --> 00:39:01,000
Speaker 1: for the better. Not only did their physiology changed, but

563
00:39:01,040 --> 00:39:05,440
Speaker 1: their psychology and their sociology and their emotional system. And

564
00:39:05,480 --> 00:39:09,280
Speaker 1: they built resilience and understanding and awareness and strength and insight.

565
00:39:10,040 --> 00:39:13,920
Speaker 1: And they did something hard. And yes, their body changed,

566
00:39:14,520 --> 00:39:17,520
Speaker 1: so where they live changed, but who they are changed

567
00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:21,360
Speaker 1: along the way because they created something that is a

568
00:39:21,400 --> 00:39:25,520
Speaker 1: great result. They did something that was hard, and then

569
00:39:25,840 --> 00:39:28,920
Speaker 1: they take that strength and that knowledge and that confidence

570
00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:33,640
Speaker 1: and competence from that transformative process into other processes in

571
00:39:33,680 --> 00:39:39,840
Speaker 1: their life. I encourage you to think about how you think,

572
00:39:41,600 --> 00:39:44,000
Speaker 1: and I encourage you to open the door on this

573
00:39:44,160 --> 00:39:49,640
Speaker 1: kind of awareness of how much of what I do

574
00:39:49,920 --> 00:39:53,279
Speaker 1: is a result of programming, and how much is me