WEBVTT - #1896 Interviewed By A Listener - Kelly Smith 0:00:00.480 --> 0:00:02.800 I get a you bloody champions, it's Harps. Who else 0:00:02.800 --> 0:00:05.600 would be welcome to the you projects? So I put 0:00:05.640 --> 0:00:08.760 out a little a call, you know, out in the 0:00:08.880 --> 0:00:13.800 podcast Wilderness a couple of weeks ago, asking for you, 0:00:15.360 --> 0:00:18.079 my listeners, my faithful, trusty listeners, to send in a 0:00:18.160 --> 0:00:22.120 queue that I might provide an A four for some 0:00:22.280 --> 0:00:27.080 Q and A. And one of our cheeky listeners who's 0:00:27.080 --> 0:00:30.280 not totally unfamiliar to all of you, Kelly, who's been 0:00:30.320 --> 0:00:33.200 on the show once before, went well, I've got more 0:00:33.200 --> 0:00:36.040 than a question. I've got a couple and oh no, 0:00:36.200 --> 0:00:39.480 I think you said, can I come on and ask 0:00:39.600 --> 0:00:44.279 these questions? Or something like that? Firstly, Hi, Kel, how 0:00:44.320 --> 0:00:44.600 are you? 0:00:45.080 --> 0:00:47.560 Hi? Craig, I'm good. I did ask that. I thought 0:00:47.600 --> 0:00:50.479 I'm going to be cheeky and you'll either say yes 0:00:50.600 --> 0:00:50.800 or no. 0:00:52.280 --> 0:00:54.760 I love that though. I love that. Look if you're 0:00:54.760 --> 0:00:57.840 a if you're a well, if you listen and you 0:00:57.840 --> 0:01:00.360 wouldn't mind doing one of these one day and you 0:01:00.360 --> 0:01:03.800 think you know you can come on and ask me 0:01:03.840 --> 0:01:06.280 some questions, well we'll do another one. We're not going 0:01:06.360 --> 0:01:08.399 to do a million of them, but you know, I 0:01:08.480 --> 0:01:11.120 definitely go into the group and hit me up and 0:01:11.200 --> 0:01:13.800 at some stage we'll do another one. But so the 0:01:13.880 --> 0:01:16.320 quick backstory that is not large, but call and I 0:01:16.360 --> 0:01:19.920 train at the same gym, So I don't know, I 0:01:19.959 --> 0:01:23.600 don't know our Is that our origin story the gym 0:01:23.840 --> 0:01:25.960 or is it like did you? I know that we've 0:01:26.040 --> 0:01:28.280 kind of we high five each other near the bloody 0:01:28.280 --> 0:01:32.040 cable crossovers and the bench press, and we we share 0:01:32.080 --> 0:01:34.000 a little bit of love, but we don't really know 0:01:34.120 --> 0:01:37.600 each other off the podcast or outside the gym that much. 0:01:38.040 --> 0:01:40.320 Is that we initially intersected? 0:01:41.200 --> 0:01:44.600 Yeah, the gym. I remember seeing people kind of flocking 0:01:44.640 --> 0:01:46.800 around you and I thought, who, who on earth is 0:01:46.840 --> 0:01:50.160 this person? Why is he so? Why is he so popular? 0:01:50.200 --> 0:01:54.000 Why is he so intriguing? And then yeah, I just 0:01:54.080 --> 0:01:57.520 kind of stumbled upon who you were and we started talking. 0:01:58.520 --> 0:02:01.960 You know, I got over my intimation and said hello 0:02:02.000 --> 0:02:04.240 a couple of times and that was it, and started 0:02:04.240 --> 0:02:07.400 listening to the podcast and really got a lot out 0:02:07.400 --> 0:02:10.920 of it. So I think that's our Yeah, that's our origin. 0:02:11.760 --> 0:02:15.880 And I think we did a listener Asking Me Questions 0:02:15.919 --> 0:02:18.600 series a couple of years ago and you came on, 0:02:18.639 --> 0:02:21.560 do you remember what nump? Doesn't matter? I don't do 0:02:21.600 --> 0:02:24.040 you remember what number it was? I don't. 0:02:24.400 --> 0:02:26.240 I think it was about five years ago. 0:02:26.800 --> 0:02:31.080 Yeah, well we've been around for that long, all right. 0:02:31.200 --> 0:02:34.560 So you actually came up with some really good questions. So, 0:02:35.440 --> 0:02:40.480 as always everyone, I normally don't know the questions in advance, 0:02:40.760 --> 0:02:45.920 and I've not done any massive preparation or anything. But 0:02:45.960 --> 0:02:48.280 I've given each of these questions a little bit of 0:02:48.320 --> 0:02:55.480 thought because Kelly's questions were really different and insightful. And 0:02:55.560 --> 0:02:57.960 I'm not just pissing in your pocket because you hear 0:02:58.919 --> 0:03:02.320 quite clever. And for me, I get asked a lot 0:03:02.320 --> 0:03:04.760 of the same shit, and I do lots of other 0:03:04.760 --> 0:03:09.480 people's podcasts, and that's okay. I'm not mad at answering 0:03:09.520 --> 0:03:12.840 the same questions, but you know, it's nice when I 0:03:12.880 --> 0:03:16.119 get asked questions that you know. Also, I get asked 0:03:16.200 --> 0:03:19.400 questions I don't know the answers to, of course, but 0:03:19.440 --> 0:03:22.079 I'll give I'll share some thoughts or ideas. But these 0:03:22.160 --> 0:03:26.400 questions are really good. So we're gonna we're going to 0:03:26.560 --> 0:03:28.480 see how we land. I feel like this is going 0:03:28.560 --> 0:03:32.160 to end up being two or three short ish podcasts. 0:03:33.080 --> 0:03:39.160 We have fifteen questions in total, and knowing me and 0:03:39.240 --> 0:03:43.400 my verbosity, as Sister Kathleen used to say, I am 0:03:43.720 --> 0:03:53.160 excessively verbose and loquacious, and that I am. So yeah, 0:03:53.240 --> 0:03:56.240 let's get underway, let's go, let's see how we go. 0:03:56.400 --> 0:03:59.000 And this could be one long podcast or a few 0:03:59.040 --> 0:04:02.400 different ones, and anything that you want to add or 0:04:02.440 --> 0:04:05.480 weave in around your questions and my answers, feel free. 0:04:06.480 --> 0:04:08.800 Kelly Smith, takeover. 0:04:09.240 --> 0:04:12.600 Take over. Well, I wanted to ask you things that 0:04:12.680 --> 0:04:15.280 were different to what I've heard on the podcast, because 0:04:15.320 --> 0:04:18.760 I do listen to almost every episode and I'm not 0:04:18.839 --> 0:04:21.360 just saying that's pissing your pocket because I'm here, I 0:04:21.440 --> 0:04:26.320 genuinely do. So what I've noticed at the moment is 0:04:26.320 --> 0:04:29.160 that there is a huge uptake in the health and wellbeing, 0:04:29.320 --> 0:04:34.279 fitness fitness influencer space, and you know, every other person 0:04:34.400 --> 0:04:37.480 has something to say about that. So I was wondering, 0:04:38.120 --> 0:04:42.040 is there anyone or any single message that you feel 0:04:42.120 --> 0:04:45.239 is absolutely on point at the moment in that space? 0:04:45.600 --> 0:04:48.919 And the opposite of that, is there any messaging that 0:04:49.000 --> 0:04:50.679 you think is completely off base? 0:04:52.200 --> 0:04:56.120 All right, let's go with question one. So the question 0:04:56.320 --> 0:04:59.520 is do I think there's anything that's getting brought up 0:04:59.520 --> 0:05:02.000 a lot or presented a lot in media and social 0:05:02.040 --> 0:05:08.160 media that's bang on. So that there's there's a lot 0:05:08.200 --> 0:05:12.159 of culti thinking and a lot of emotional kind of 0:05:13.040 --> 0:05:20.520 bro science pseudoscience that I don't see eye to eye with, 0:05:21.560 --> 0:05:24.599 But there's one message that's starting to get a fair 0:05:24.640 --> 0:05:27.760 bit of airtime that I fucking love and I'm giving 0:05:27.760 --> 0:05:31.680 it a fair bit of airtime. And this is this 0:05:31.720 --> 0:05:33.760 is not new, by the way. We've known this for 0:05:33.760 --> 0:05:36.039 a long time, but we've never really leaned into it. 0:05:36.120 --> 0:05:39.360 We've never really shone a light on it, and we've 0:05:39.400 --> 0:05:42.800 never in public really opened the door widely on it. 0:05:43.520 --> 0:05:46.680 And that is the message around the importance of an 0:05:46.839 --> 0:05:58.240 impact on love, connection, kindness, social acceptance, and belonging on physical, mental, 0:05:58.240 --> 0:06:03.159 and emotional health. So we talk a lot in our 0:06:04.120 --> 0:06:07.240 world about, of course, about food, and about exercise, and 0:06:07.279 --> 0:06:09.920 about sleep, and about drugs and about boos and about 0:06:09.960 --> 0:06:12.720 stress and about all of those things, and we need 0:06:12.760 --> 0:06:14.640 to talk about those because they are all factors and 0:06:14.720 --> 0:06:20.080 variables which one hundred percent impact on a person's physical, mental, 0:06:20.120 --> 0:06:23.719 and emotional health. But what we know now is that 0:06:24.960 --> 0:06:30.320 things like loneliness and social disconnection and isolation and rejection 0:06:31.279 --> 0:06:35.640 and an individual feeling like they don't belong with, they're 0:06:35.640 --> 0:06:40.280 not wanted or loved or needed, has an incredibly negative 0:06:40.279 --> 0:06:44.240 effect on their physiology, not just their psychology and their 0:06:44.279 --> 0:06:49.039 emotional state. So the answer is, what I'm loving is 0:06:49.080 --> 0:06:54.560 that we're now starting to recognize the impact of sociology 0:06:54.760 --> 0:06:58.400 in broad terms, the way a person operates on a 0:06:58.440 --> 0:07:02.680 sociological level with friends and family and other humans, and 0:07:02.760 --> 0:07:06.120 the impact of that, and the role of that, and 0:07:06.160 --> 0:07:10.800 the importance of that with helping people live long and strong. 0:07:11.440 --> 0:07:15.200 So you know, like I think this kel. I don't 0:07:15.240 --> 0:07:18.200 have data on this, but I'm pretty fucking sure about this. 0:07:18.760 --> 0:07:24.560 If somebody had ticked all the boxes pretty well, not perfect, 0:07:24.560 --> 0:07:27.000 but they eat pretty well, they exercise pretty well, they 0:07:27.080 --> 0:07:31.120 sleep pretty well. You know, they don't do much booze, 0:07:31.120 --> 0:07:33.840 they don't eat much junk, they walk a fair bit. 0:07:34.040 --> 0:07:36.840 They tick all of the boxes, and they're somewhere in 0:07:36.880 --> 0:07:39.480 the ballpark of a seven to nine out of ten 0:07:40.000 --> 0:07:44.280 on all of those markers or variables. But that person 0:07:44.480 --> 0:07:49.800 lives by themselves and are isolated and lonely and feel 0:07:49.960 --> 0:07:56.600 unloved and unwanted and socially and emotionally disconnected, I think 0:07:56.720 --> 0:08:00.120 that will have a bigger impact on them than any 0:08:00.200 --> 0:08:05.680 of the other variables in isolation. Right. So yeah, because 0:08:05.760 --> 0:08:10.400 when you're lonely, your biochemistry changes. You know, when you're lonely, 0:08:10.480 --> 0:08:15.160 you're producing, for one of a more accurate scientific term, 0:08:15.280 --> 0:08:20.200 sad hormones and stress hormones. And hormones affect your physiology 0:08:20.200 --> 0:08:23.120 from a cellular level up. And we know there's a 0:08:23.280 --> 0:08:25.320 you've probably heard me bang on about it. There's a 0:08:25.560 --> 0:08:29.880 thing called ah fuckuld you fuck? Come on, harps, reach 0:08:29.960 --> 0:08:34.360 into the old mental It's called psychoneuroimmunology. There it is 0:08:34.400 --> 0:08:37.840 from the shelf up the back of my brain. Psychooneuroimmunology 0:08:37.920 --> 0:08:41.520 or p and I talks about the relationship between basically 0:08:41.640 --> 0:08:44.120 how you are mentally and emotionally and the impact that 0:08:44.120 --> 0:08:47.320 that has on your immune system and also everything else. 0:08:47.960 --> 0:08:50.840 So the long winded answer is, I think we're shine 0:08:51.360 --> 0:08:54.280 in the health wellness fitness space. We're now starting to 0:08:54.360 --> 0:09:02.839 talk about the fact that being in healthy relationships, being loved, needed, wanted, connected, 0:09:03.360 --> 0:09:11.000 is actually a huge effect of an impact on not 0:09:11.040 --> 0:09:15.920 only physical, mental, emotional health, but also health span and lifespan. Help. 0:09:16.559 --> 0:09:19.480 Yeah, do you think also too? And this is a 0:09:19.520 --> 0:09:23.280 side note to it, but given that we've got organizations 0:09:23.280 --> 0:09:27.040 like the AFL shining a light on men's mental health rounds, 0:09:27.120 --> 0:09:30.680 and then we've got players who are sadly taking their 0:09:30.679 --> 0:09:33.640 lives because of mental health issues. Do you think that 0:09:34.760 --> 0:09:37.640 it becoming more mainstream in such a way is also 0:09:37.760 --> 0:09:41.520 helping to shine that light on love and connection rather 0:09:41.600 --> 0:09:43.800 than you know, you need muscles and you need to 0:09:43.840 --> 0:09:46.320 be bloky, or you need to be chummy or whatever 0:09:46.360 --> 0:09:46.679 it is. 0:09:47.640 --> 0:09:51.120 Yeah. Sure, And look, I mean, I think there's a 0:09:51.120 --> 0:09:54.160 lot of things which are pigeonholed on. Men can't talk 0:09:54.200 --> 0:09:57.559 about emotions or that's kind of bullshit that men are 0:09:57.600 --> 0:10:01.520 definitely not as good as women, I think, But that's 0:10:01.600 --> 0:10:04.680 just my opinion. But look, dude's I talk about I'm 0:10:04.760 --> 0:10:07.439 constantly talking about feelings and emotions and I'm a bit 0:10:07.440 --> 0:10:10.000 of an alpha male, But am I I don't know, 0:10:10.600 --> 0:10:12.719 I've got biceps. But I'll give you a hug, I'll 0:10:12.760 --> 0:10:15.320 fucking cry with you, I'll sit with you, I'll have 0:10:15.440 --> 0:10:17.800 snot going on with you. I'll do the whole fucking 0:10:17.840 --> 0:10:21.439 shooting match, and I'll tell you about all my flaws 0:10:21.440 --> 0:10:24.680 and weaknesses and bullshit and fear and insecurity and I 0:10:24.720 --> 0:10:27.240 don't think that makes me less of a bloke, right, 0:10:27.920 --> 0:10:32.840 But yeah, you're absolutely right, and it is good that 0:10:32.880 --> 0:10:37.240 we're bringing this to, you know, a space where it's 0:10:37.559 --> 0:10:41.400 it's more visible, it's more talked about, there's more awareness. 0:10:42.640 --> 0:10:44.760 We're pulling it out of the darkness into the light, 0:10:45.720 --> 0:10:48.520 and it's it is for the obvious reasons of mental 0:10:48.559 --> 0:10:52.800 health and suicide prevention and all of that, of course, 0:10:52.840 --> 0:10:57.000 but also just more broadly. You know, people who feel 0:10:57.200 --> 0:11:03.920 like I consciously, intentionally and consciously find a way to 0:11:05.040 --> 0:11:07.439 at least invest a little bit of time and energy 0:11:07.480 --> 0:11:11.640 and love into people that I don't know, or whenever 0:11:11.720 --> 0:11:13.839 I can. I was going to say every day, Well 0:11:13.880 --> 0:11:16.840 that's not true, because every day an opportunity doesn't present itself, 0:11:17.000 --> 0:11:22.880 but whenever I can. And I think that, you know, 0:11:23.000 --> 0:11:25.080 not only and I know this sounds all shit. 0:11:25.120 --> 0:11:27.400 We've got all very deep and spiritual very quickly, but 0:11:27.480 --> 0:11:30.559 I truly just believe that not only is it great 0:11:30.600 --> 0:11:32.520 for the person that you're giving love to and paying 0:11:32.520 --> 0:11:38.640 attention to and sharing some unconditional kindness with, I think it's. 0:11:38.440 --> 0:11:42.000 Great for you too. And absolutely I know there's another 0:11:42.040 --> 0:11:45.320 question about that. Just read out your second question again, 0:11:45.360 --> 0:11:46.560 because I glossed over it. 0:11:46.640 --> 0:11:51.840 So question two, So basically, what's the opposite? Do you 0:11:51.880 --> 0:11:55.880 think there's any messaging at the moment that is completely inaccurate? 0:11:57.400 --> 0:12:00.640 Yeah, Look, I think there's a I don't want to 0:12:00.720 --> 0:12:07.440 identify a specific thing, but I think that the broad 0:12:07.679 --> 0:12:12.840 kind of messaging that that happens in. Look, it happens 0:12:12.840 --> 0:12:19.680 in what I would call psychological, ideological, and scientific or 0:12:19.720 --> 0:12:24.160 pseudo scientific silos. Do you like that? And what I 0:12:24.320 --> 0:12:28.040 mean by that is people saying this is the best 0:12:28.080 --> 0:12:31.680 way too, This is the best way to lose weight 0:12:31.880 --> 0:12:34.120 or fat, This is the best way to build muscle, 0:12:34.240 --> 0:12:37.480 This is the best way to sleep effectively, This is 0:12:37.520 --> 0:12:39.880 the best way to hydrate, this is the best way 0:12:40.360 --> 0:12:42.640 to get rich. This is you know, all of that 0:12:42.880 --> 0:12:48.320 anything around, And what I truly believe is that you 0:12:48.360 --> 0:12:53.920 know there is there is There are very few things 0:12:54.360 --> 0:12:59.440 that work for everybody the same, in fact, other than 0:12:59.480 --> 0:13:02.720 fucking eating oxygen. I reckon, we all need that, right, Well, 0:13:02.720 --> 0:13:05.600 that's a given, but there's not much you know, Well, 0:13:05.600 --> 0:13:07.080 we all need water, we all need you know. But 0:13:07.120 --> 0:13:09.000 even then you go, well how much water do you need? Well, 0:13:09.040 --> 0:13:11.760 how much do your weigh? How much did you sweat? Today, 0:13:11.760 --> 0:13:14.920 how much do you typically sweat? You know, what kind 0:13:14.920 --> 0:13:16.440 of food did you eat? Did the food that you 0:13:16.480 --> 0:13:18.880 eat was it high water content food or low water 0:13:18.960 --> 0:13:21.120 content food? Because if you eat a diet the high 0:13:21.160 --> 0:13:24.120 and water content food, you don't need to drink as 0:13:24.200 --> 0:13:26.680 much as the person who doesn't. Oh, I didn't know that, right, 0:13:27.000 --> 0:13:28.679 So there are a lot of variables. So what I 0:13:28.760 --> 0:13:35.440 hate is any messaging that tells people that this is 0:13:35.520 --> 0:13:40.280 the best way for everyone to achieve this particular outcome. 0:13:40.960 --> 0:13:47.880 And I wrote something yesterday specific to this, which is 0:13:47.920 --> 0:13:52.640 not a very good it's not a very good kind 0:13:52.640 --> 0:13:55.280 of interruption, but I'm going to find it. So I 0:13:55.280 --> 0:13:58.120 wrote this thing yesterday and it's specific to what I'm 0:13:58.160 --> 0:14:01.680 talking about. And it's a whiteboard of mine that you've 0:14:01.679 --> 0:14:05.040 probably read twenty times. It's old, and the whiteboard says 0:14:05.040 --> 0:14:08.559 something works for everybody, but everything doesn't work for everybody, 0:14:09.120 --> 0:14:11.880 So find your something. And then I wrote in the 0:14:11.920 --> 0:14:18.160 comment there's no universal best diet, workout, sleep protocol, medication, supplement, lifestyle, 0:14:18.320 --> 0:14:23.080 or even job. That is, there's no single intervention, strategy 0:14:23.160 --> 0:14:27.760 or approach that works equally well for everyone. But there 0:14:27.880 --> 0:14:32.280 is a best everything for you, the individual what works 0:14:32.320 --> 0:14:36.240 optimally for me could be anywhere between mildly effective and 0:14:36.280 --> 0:14:40.760 disastrous for you. My healthy snack could be your anaphylactic reaction. 0:14:40.960 --> 0:14:43.920 My dream career could be your nightmare job. The medication 0:14:44.040 --> 0:14:48.040 that helps me function might give you anxiety. Don't confuse 0:14:48.120 --> 0:14:52.800 advertising with information or truth or pseudoscience with actual science. 0:14:52.840 --> 0:14:56.000 Your body is your greatest teacher and truth teller. And 0:14:56.040 --> 0:15:00.240 so for me, that's like I'm like, even when you've 0:15:00.280 --> 0:15:04.360 got to remember when a doctor, a dietitian, like we're 0:15:04.360 --> 0:15:08.520 talking about a GP here, and even surgeons to an extent, 0:15:08.880 --> 0:15:13.840 and exercise scientists and psychologists, and when we sit in 0:15:13.840 --> 0:15:17.160 front of a person like me. I've written tens of 0:15:17.200 --> 0:15:21.400 thousands of programs for people, fitness, exercise program strength programs, 0:15:22.120 --> 0:15:26.160 a myriad of different variations of that. I've trained. I've 0:15:26.160 --> 0:15:29.720 done over fifty thousand PT sessions. Now, if you came 0:15:29.760 --> 0:15:31.840 to me, and I know you reasonably well, you sat 0:15:31.880 --> 0:15:34.240 down and you went, Craig, this is me. You've seen 0:15:34.280 --> 0:15:37.280 my body, you know me, and you said, Craig, these 0:15:37.320 --> 0:15:40.200 are my goals. And then I said, cal let's do 0:15:40.320 --> 0:15:43.840 some testing. And then with all of that data, I'm 0:15:43.880 --> 0:15:46.880 going to then write you a program, and what that 0:15:47.000 --> 0:15:50.680 program is is my best guess at what I think 0:15:50.720 --> 0:15:53.880 will work based on all my knowledge and experience and 0:15:53.880 --> 0:15:56.600 all the shit you told me. But is it going 0:15:56.680 --> 0:16:01.600 to be the perfect program? No chance. So everything is 0:16:01.760 --> 0:16:04.880 kind of to a point, high level trial and error 0:16:05.160 --> 0:16:09.800 and educated guessing. When a doctor like I've got this 0:16:09.880 --> 0:16:14.920 thing called you station tube dysfunction, right, my ears, one 0:16:14.920 --> 0:16:18.360 of my ears blocks usually not both at the same time, 0:16:18.360 --> 0:16:20.640 but one or the other blocks. And it's like I've 0:16:20.640 --> 0:16:23.200 been trying to resolve this problem. I reckon. I've spoken 0:16:23.240 --> 0:16:28.040 to ten medical people who've all given me different advice, 0:16:28.080 --> 0:16:31.960 which is cool, who are all qualified, all knowledgeable, spoken 0:16:32.000 --> 0:16:34.720 a pharmacists. I've spoken to a bunch of people I've 0:16:34.720 --> 0:16:39.000 done and they've all given me medical advice. They've all 0:16:39.040 --> 0:16:41.280 got more knowledge than me. They've all given me advice. 0:16:41.440 --> 0:16:45.880 None of the advice worked, right, So this is my point. 0:16:46.080 --> 0:16:49.760 My point is everyone's taking an educated. 0:16:49.280 --> 0:16:53.400 Guess yep, yep. So there's no one size fits all 0:16:53.480 --> 0:16:55.080 for obviously not. 0:16:55.880 --> 0:16:58.360 And even down to one that might surprise you. It's 0:16:58.480 --> 0:17:05.679 like people would think I would say everyone should lift weights. No, 0:17:05.880 --> 0:17:09.080 I wouldn't say that. I would say everyone over forty 0:17:09.200 --> 0:17:13.600 should do some strength training, in my opinion, for a 0:17:13.600 --> 0:17:16.879 bunch of very logical reasons that I could explain. But 0:17:17.040 --> 0:17:19.520 do need people need to go to a gym? No? 0:17:19.680 --> 0:17:22.600 Do they need to lift bar bells, dumbbells and kettlebells? No? 0:17:23.320 --> 0:17:27.679 Are there other ways to build strength heaps? Okay, So 0:17:27.760 --> 0:17:31.280 I'm suggesting strength training is probably a good idea for 0:17:31.400 --> 0:17:36.600 most people. Unless you're a genetic freak, or unless you 0:17:36.920 --> 0:17:41.720 do something daily that keeps you physically very strong and robust, 0:17:41.960 --> 0:17:45.040 then you don't need it. But even with that, I'm like, well, 0:17:45.320 --> 0:17:48.679 how you get strong and stay strong? There's a myriad 0:17:48.720 --> 0:17:49.520 of options for that. 0:17:51.160 --> 0:17:54.439 Yeah, I mean, look, you wouldn't recommend my ninety five 0:17:54.520 --> 0:17:56.000 year old and do a bench press, would you. 0:17:56.160 --> 0:17:59.840 I mean, she'd probably beat me at the moment with 0:17:59.920 --> 0:18:03.040 me fuck shoulders, But no, we won't. We won't be 0:18:03.119 --> 0:18:06.359 doing that for grant. Are those answers? Okay? 0:18:07.280 --> 0:18:10.399 Yeah? Very interesting and not what I expected either. 0:18:11.160 --> 0:18:14.000 Oh good, good? Yeah, all right, what's you down? Only 0:18:14.040 --> 0:18:14.720 thirteen to go? 0:18:15.000 --> 0:18:19.040 Let's crack on, let's go. So this probably you can 0:18:19.119 --> 0:18:23.440 expand upon from your first answer, and as a long 0:18:23.480 --> 0:18:28.080 time listener, something I've noticed is do you feel like 0:18:28.240 --> 0:18:31.960 your style has changed recently and that perhaps you're a 0:18:31.960 --> 0:18:34.919 bit more vulnerable than you have been in the past. 0:18:35.040 --> 0:18:40.119 And if you feel that, what's been the change? 0:18:42.920 --> 0:18:47.119 I think he reaches down to plug his fine and 0:18:47.240 --> 0:18:49.159 terrible thing to do in the middle of a podcast. 0:18:50.000 --> 0:18:53.000 I think, I think, yes, I don't want to be 0:18:53.040 --> 0:18:58.040 disingenuous when when I say this, so you know, I 0:18:58.040 --> 0:19:00.040 don't want to bang on because everyone's the same. I 0:19:00.080 --> 0:19:03.160 mean kind of not there. I just said everyone's saying 0:19:03.240 --> 0:19:04.879 definitely not the same. But I think a lot of 0:19:04.880 --> 0:19:08.639 people suffer from insecurity. I reckon you probably have or 0:19:08.680 --> 0:19:13.159 do I have, or do right? And so I was 0:19:13.480 --> 0:19:16.800 as somebody with a little bit of a profile. I 0:19:17.080 --> 0:19:24.360 was so good at distracting and deflecting and instead of 0:19:24.520 --> 0:19:29.760 at times probably opening doors that I could or should 0:19:29.760 --> 0:19:32.280 have opened in some conversations, I would just be the 0:19:32.280 --> 0:19:35.960 funny guy because I can make people laugh, I can 0:19:35.960 --> 0:19:39.119 tell stories, I can inspire people. I can be passionate, 0:19:39.160 --> 0:19:40.480 I can be them. I can do all of that. 0:19:41.400 --> 0:19:45.720 But I also wanted people to think highly of me, 0:19:47.920 --> 0:19:50.680 which is, you know, all kinds of insecure and fear 0:19:50.720 --> 0:19:54.760 and a bunch of other things, of course. And I 0:19:54.800 --> 0:19:57.159 mean it's not just the last few years. Maybe the 0:19:57.240 --> 0:20:00.720 last few years, I've become more and more I try 0:20:00.720 --> 0:20:05.800 to be you know that that thing I talk about. 0:20:05.840 --> 0:20:09.280 There's like there's public you, there's personal you, there's private you, 0:20:09.359 --> 0:20:12.159 and secret you. Do you remember that little kind of ye? 0:20:12.400 --> 0:20:15.840 So you know, public you is the you that everyone 0:20:16.080 --> 0:20:19.199 anyone can access, you know, the blocoo's selling you you bananas. 0:20:19.400 --> 0:20:22.560 He gets to meet public you, and then personal you, 0:20:22.720 --> 0:20:27.160 I think is more closer friends and family, and then 0:20:27.440 --> 0:20:31.840 private you is really maybe one or two people, maybe 0:20:31.920 --> 0:20:35.080 three depends how and then secret you is that's just 0:20:35.160 --> 0:20:38.960 you gets to know that person, right, Yeah, Well I 0:20:39.359 --> 0:20:43.480 try to open I try to get through, you know, 0:20:43.640 --> 0:20:48.320 like on a podcast. I try to bypass public me 0:20:48.560 --> 0:20:51.080 and personal me and get somewhere in the ballpark of 0:20:51.200 --> 0:20:58.000 private me and maybe even periodically secret me, because I 0:20:58.040 --> 0:21:01.440 think it might be valuable to other people. And I 0:21:01.480 --> 0:21:04.200 think if people think less of me or I'm embarrassed 0:21:04.280 --> 0:21:08.480 or I'm humiliated or I look less, I'm okay with it. 0:21:09.040 --> 0:21:11.320 And if I'm not okay with it, that's my ego. 0:21:12.400 --> 0:21:14.960 And so like one of the things that when you 0:21:15.040 --> 0:21:18.399 talk about a value driven life, like where I say 0:21:18.440 --> 0:21:21.879 one of my key values is service and love and kindness. 0:21:23.000 --> 0:21:25.359 I think it's really easy to say that on a podcast. 0:21:26.240 --> 0:21:27.919 Absolutely, I think it's. 0:21:27.840 --> 0:21:30.280 Very fucking hard to live it when no one's looking, 0:21:30.320 --> 0:21:35.080 no one's watching, and because like I feel like, and 0:21:34.640 --> 0:21:37.879 I'm not saying I'm better than anyone, I'm definitely not. 0:21:38.000 --> 0:21:39.600 But I feel like there are a lot of people 0:21:39.680 --> 0:21:44.359 who have public attention or a spotlight who I don't reckon. 0:21:44.400 --> 0:21:47.199 The way that they are when they're being watched is 0:21:47.240 --> 0:21:49.439 the way that they are when they're not being watched. 0:21:49.520 --> 0:21:52.320 I feel like there's some bullshit going on with a 0:21:52.359 --> 0:21:55.960 lot of people, And if I'm being completely transparent, there's 0:21:56.000 --> 0:21:59.639 been bullshit going on with me over the years, you know. 0:21:59.800 --> 0:22:04.199 I think for the most part I was close to authentic, 0:22:04.280 --> 0:22:06.879 but there was still bullshit and deception and lies and 0:22:06.920 --> 0:22:09.720 insecurity and me trying to be impressive, right. 0:22:10.680 --> 0:22:12.960 And that was just fueled by your ego. 0:22:14.560 --> 0:22:21.600 Ego, insecurity, fear, self loathing, oh, just pick a fucking yeah, 0:22:21.680 --> 0:22:23.680 all of it, market, all of it. 0:22:24.200 --> 0:22:26.560 This is exactly what I mean, though, And the interesting 0:22:26.640 --> 0:22:29.560 thing is that I picked up on it from a 0:22:29.600 --> 0:22:32.840 whiteboard that you put out which was about imposter syndrome, 0:22:33.240 --> 0:22:36.480 and you just think it was like three slides and 0:22:36.520 --> 0:22:39.879 you listed everything that you were insecure about, and I 0:22:39.880 --> 0:22:43.240 think you ended it with something like I'm human. And 0:22:43.920 --> 0:22:46.480 having been listening and following for so long, it was 0:22:46.520 --> 0:22:48.920 the first time that I kind of stopped and went, 0:22:49.520 --> 0:22:54.040 oh shit, that's everything that I feel. And if someone 0:22:54.080 --> 0:22:56.239 in your position is putting it out there that you 0:22:56.320 --> 0:23:00.840 feel the same way, well, that's hope, and that's that's honesty, 0:23:00.920 --> 0:23:05.280 and that's really vulnerable. And then I started listening in 0:23:05.320 --> 0:23:07.919 a different way and I thought, Okay, there's there's something 0:23:07.960 --> 0:23:12.240 that's coming through that is hitting more to the core 0:23:12.320 --> 0:23:14.080 of you than there ever has been. And that's what 0:23:14.160 --> 0:23:14.959 that question was. 0:23:15.880 --> 0:23:23.840 Wow, thank you. Yeah, it's it's it's for me. It's 0:23:23.880 --> 0:23:31.480 a constant process to walk my talk, you know, to 0:23:31.640 --> 0:23:38.520 do to do what I say and too because I'm 0:23:38.520 --> 0:23:40.480 an only child and part of me wants attention and 0:23:40.520 --> 0:23:43.879 all that bullshit, and and like, I really think that 0:23:44.560 --> 0:23:46.760 for me, and this is going to sound weird, but 0:23:46.960 --> 0:23:52.480 it's a spiritual journey of and again this sounds bullshitty, 0:23:52.520 --> 0:23:55.359 but having a purpose bigger than me. Yeah, you know, 0:23:55.400 --> 0:23:59.200 and I know that I used to be all about 0:23:59.240 --> 0:24:01.560 my well, I wasn't always all about my body, but 0:24:01.600 --> 0:24:04.080 I was about you know, building a business, building a brand, 0:24:04.119 --> 0:24:06.760 looking good, you know, all that stuff. Nothing wrong with 0:24:06.800 --> 0:24:11.080 any of that, by the way, but realizing, you know, 0:24:11.119 --> 0:24:13.920 getting to a point where I had kind of ticked 0:24:13.920 --> 0:24:18.520 a lot of boxes, you know, and from the outline 0:24:18.840 --> 0:24:25.159 outside looking in, people would have thought, you know, he 0:24:25.160 --> 0:24:28.199 he's got his shit together, he's going well. But so 0:24:28.400 --> 0:24:34.480 often the confident, funny, successful guy is actually the sad, scared, 0:24:34.720 --> 0:24:39.280 insecure guy trying to be what he thinks is going 0:24:39.359 --> 0:24:42.800 to impress people. And I And by the way, I 0:24:42.800 --> 0:24:45.280 don't sit at home fucking rocking back and forwards, going 0:24:45.359 --> 0:24:49.119 I'm broken. I still you know, I still fuck around, 0:24:49.160 --> 0:24:51.159 I still have fun, I still have a good life. 0:24:51.200 --> 0:24:55.280 But I just think the irony is that trying to 0:24:55.359 --> 0:24:59.720 be impressive is the opposite. 0:25:00.119 --> 0:25:01.119 It'd be very tiring. 0:25:02.040 --> 0:25:05.359