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Speaker 1: This is the Fits in with with Kate Richie podcast,

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Speaker 1: serious topic of bullying fits. We need a round table

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Speaker 1: on this one. This was a story of recent times

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Speaker 1: where a fed up father has stormed into his daughter's

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Speaker 1: school that's a primary school, too fits and confront of

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Speaker 1: the bully. Now that he's ended up in court. And

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Speaker 1: I understand this because we can't have parents storming into schools.

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Speaker 1: But when a parent is absolutely fed up at a

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Speaker 1: school not acting and this treatment continuing on their child,

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Speaker 1: you can understand, Like I can find empathy for a

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Speaker 1: parent who storms the school to confront the bully in

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Speaker 1: I hope it's threatening them to stop the ball.

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Speaker 2: If there's been multiple attempts to stop it and it

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Speaker 2: hasn't happened, what do you do? I mean, what are

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Speaker 2: we doing that situation?

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Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, it's horrible, isn't it? That the tribunal

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Speaker 1: describes the parents' actions as disgusting and atrocious? And I

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Speaker 1: can understand that because I think the court situation like that.

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Speaker 1: You need to set an example as well. You need

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Speaker 1: to make an example of the parents so that it

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Speaker 1: doesn't happen more often. I mean not long ago. If

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Speaker 1: we go back to last year there was Saint Paul's

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Speaker 1: College in Adelaide, and this was a moment. Right, So

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Speaker 1: I'll just set this up by telling you that the

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Speaker 1: bullying had been going on for twelve months to this point,

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Speaker 1: and the mother said, I've done everything in my power

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Speaker 1: as a parent, and so is her husband to make

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Speaker 1: sure my daughter was safe. And when it continued, she

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Speaker 1: stormed into class one day. And you can imagine how

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Speaker 1: intense this would have been. And here was the moment

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Speaker 1: she confronted the bully.

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Speaker 2: It's tough.

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Speaker 1: You can hear the intensity of that. I'm your worst nightmare.

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Speaker 2: It is tough. My old man did it for me.

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Speaker 2: So I was in a group when I first went

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Speaker 2: to high school. I was in a group of mates

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Speaker 2: and then they found out that I was playing for

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Speaker 2: a different football that's right. Yeah, So they all played

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Speaker 2: in the same footy team and they had no idea

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Speaker 2: that when preseason came around that they where were you

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Speaker 2: at pre season? I said, I know, I played for

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Speaker 2: another team. They had no idea how they absolutely turned

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Speaker 2: on me and I I remember, Dad, I remember I

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Speaker 2: got into the car one day and I was crying,

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Speaker 2: this is in your ah, and I just I said

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Speaker 2: I've had enough. I can't do it anymore. And Dad.

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Speaker 2: Dad was like, you point them out to me right now.

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Speaker 2: And I didn't want to. I was like, no, you're

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Speaker 2: going to make this work. You're going to flee this up.

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Speaker 2: So I had to point them out and Dad got

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Speaker 2: out of the car and I remember he just he

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Speaker 2: was yelling, he was dropping f bombs. I was so embarrassed.

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Speaker 2: And then the next day you're freaking out because it

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Speaker 2: can inflame things even more.

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Speaker 1: So what happened the next day they react.

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Speaker 2: So they freaked out. Then they went home and told

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Speaker 2: their parents, and then Dad actually knew a couple of

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Speaker 2: them through football, and so Dad just rang them and

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Speaker 2: said if they do it again, like this is just

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Speaker 2: going too far, And luckily their parents pulled them into line.

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Speaker 2: That's where I and you know what, that's where I'm

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Speaker 2: found my best mate sense from that because steps goes mate,

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Speaker 2: come and hang out with us, and I'll never ever

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Speaker 2: forget that. I'm loyal to that man for the rest

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Speaker 2: of my life. Do you know the other kids that

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Speaker 2: that was a turning point for me?

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Speaker 1: Do you know the other kids now, sorry, well they're adults, but.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I do.

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Speaker 3: And you know.

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Speaker 2: The funny thing is when I left AFL, I had

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Speaker 2: to go back and play with one of them and

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Speaker 2: I found it really hard and he hates it whenever

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Speaker 2: I bring it up. Now, he goes, N, I didn't, No,

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Speaker 2: I didn't, And I was like, no, do I remember it.

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Speaker 1: You'll never forget the mum who stormed that classroom. From

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Speaker 1: the audio we heard, I mean you sit back and

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Speaker 1: you think, oh my god. No, I remember Melanawskis at

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Speaker 1: the time saying you just can't do that, and you.

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Speaker 2: Can't, and that's correct, you can't.

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Speaker 1: But have a listen to what the mum then had

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Speaker 1: to say.

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Speaker 4: I don't want my daughter to be another statistic. I

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Speaker 4: don't want to have to bury my child because the

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Speaker 4: school are negligent and have done nothing to help us

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Speaker 4: as a family. Again, and I have stayed time and

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Speaker 4: time again to the school. We are begging, We begged

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Speaker 4: for help, We begged. My daughter had come in and

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Speaker 4: had stated she was crying. She was devastated that this

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Speaker 4: child had told her to go and hang herself. Now

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Speaker 4: that is a breaking point for any parent.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I get it. I get where the mum's gone.

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Speaker 1: I understand the mindset she would have been and if

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Speaker 1: that was your own kid. I remember I was the

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Speaker 1: hairy kid at school and my mom barged in and

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Speaker 1: had a crack at the sport teacher who kept calling

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Speaker 1: me a gorilla. And it was like, I understand this,

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Speaker 1: it's a been funny, but it was just I'd had

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Speaker 1: enough and I'd get in the car and say, he's

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Speaker 1: picked on me again. And it wasn't a kid, it

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Speaker 1: was a teacher. So I had this awkward moment where

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Speaker 1: the teacher was sitting there and my mum was leaning

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Speaker 1: over and pointing, saying, how dare you speak to.

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Speaker 2: Us so lightly?

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Speaker 1: He's not a promise, We don't we don't know.

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Speaker 2: But he's barely human.

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Speaker 1: But he don't look until we have the results. Don't

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Speaker 1: call him a gorilla. Bridget and Casula, what's your experience

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Speaker 1: with bullying at your daughter's school?

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Speaker 3: Unfortunately the principal is actually the bully and has caused

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Speaker 3: so much damage for my child and also for me,

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Speaker 3: and I've had to just pull the pin and protect

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Speaker 3: her and pull her out.

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Speaker 1: Can you expand on that? Can you give any examples

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Speaker 1: without going into too much detail.

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Speaker 5: It's verbal, just.

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Speaker 3: The tone in which this principle speaks to the children,

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Speaker 3: and I've witnessed it in the way that she speaks

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Speaker 3: to other children.

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Speaker 4: And.

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Speaker 3: It's just it's very demeaning, it's very belittling, and it's

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Speaker 3: just really unpleasant.

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Speaker 2: So Bridget, you are I mean, there's nothing more that

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Speaker 2: you can do. You have to pull your child out

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Speaker 2: of that school because I mean, that's the most senior

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Speaker 2: person at that school. That's the that's the hard thing.

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Speaker 2: And you know what schools are you know with the principle,

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Speaker 2: if they're warm and if they're they're looking out for

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Speaker 2: your child straight away, Bridget, don't you because immediately you know.

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Speaker 1: For sure, And Bridget are the other parents in aagrants

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Speaker 1: with you.

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Speaker 3: I've stayed very quiet. I'm just in my own bubble

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Speaker 3: and I'm doing what i have to do for my family.

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Speaker 1: Okay, we'll just lock that and care for the family.

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Speaker 2: I mean, if you're not getting support from a principle,

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Speaker 2: this is the thing. And I can understand why why

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Speaker 2: people snap because it's like no one's listening. Where do

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Speaker 2: I go?

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Speaker 1: Thanks for the call, Bridge, Angela and Camden.

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Speaker 5: Hello Ange Thanky, Hey going good?

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Speaker 1: You were bullied at school yourself? Is that right.

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Speaker 5: Yes, I was in high school and I was bullied

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Speaker 5: by kicks from another school. We shared the sign you'd

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Speaker 5: get the bus in school. Yeah, they used to please

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Speaker 5: be at another school that I was at, the same

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Speaker 5: bus and when they used to bully me every time,

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Speaker 5: we raised it with both schools, my school and there,

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Speaker 5: and they just kept saying, we'll deal with that, We'll

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Speaker 5: deal with it. And then one day came home and

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Speaker 5: I and your tears among.

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Speaker 6: Those, I've had enough, got in the cart you throw

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Speaker 6: through his dad's shops because his dad's shop was around

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Speaker 6: the corner from our house and films in there, and

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Speaker 6: gave an earful to growth his dad and the kid.

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Speaker 2: What was the reaction from the dad? Ae?

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Speaker 5: What?

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Speaker 2: What did did he defend the sun or did he

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Speaker 2: get angry with the sun?

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Speaker 5: It was quite disappointed in his son because his son

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Speaker 5: was older than me and was throwing his bag and

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Speaker 5: you full at me, and and you just.

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Speaker 6: Goes, Okay, I'll deal with.

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Speaker 5: You and go to worry and I never have to

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Speaker 5: go again after that, some stop bullying me. Yeah, do

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Speaker 5: you know.

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Speaker 2: What it's as a parent, right, this is what I've

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Speaker 2: never understood as well. I can never understand if if

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Speaker 2: I had another parent approach me and say that your

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Speaker 2: son has been bullying my son, I would be absolutely

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Speaker 2: devastated and you and obviously you want to you want

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Speaker 2: to protect your son as well, but you would you

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Speaker 2: would actually have a conversation and find out what's going on.

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Speaker 2: But I just parents with bullies that just keep defending

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Speaker 2: their children. This is another tough one because if you

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Speaker 2: can get through to the parent, there's no way you're

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Speaker 2: getting through to the kid.

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Speaker 6: No.

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Speaker 2: When the child hears that mum and dad are defending

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Speaker 2: them the whole time, they're going to keep bullying it.

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Speaker 1: I think there's nothing that can do the wrong And

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Speaker 1: you really appreciate the call. Thank you. It's Whip with

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Speaker 1: Kate Ritchie is a Nova podcast right shows like this.

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