Kia: Hey, this is Kia. Is it ever a right time
Kia: to have a baby? Navigating the cost of parenthood can be
Kia: daunting. So we've got an expert here today to help
Kia: us balance work and home life. Whether you are a
Kia: new parent or expecting the world of parenting can feel
Kia: like a foreign one. Welcome to another episode of A
Kia: Little Bit Richer, brought to you by my friends at
Kia: Legal & General. Charlotte Jessop from the Looking After Your Pennies
Kia: platform is here to help us navigate financial planning when
Kia: it comes to parenthood. Charlotte is a financial educator, coach, writer,
Kia: and vlogger. Welcome, Charlotte.
Charlotte Jessop: Hello.
Kia: So we're talking about the topic of parenthood and becoming
Kia: a parent is an incredible experience with all the joy
Kia: and love that it brings. And as a former bundle
Kia: of joy I should know that all too well, but
Kia: it is a very big decision. So I want to
Kia: ask you, is there ever a right time to have a
Kia: baby? And what advice do you have for people considering
Kia: starting or growing their family?
Charlotte Jessop: This is a great question. Honestly, from my own personal
Charlotte Jessop: experience there's not a right time. I made the decision
Charlotte Jessop: to be a parent purely from an emotional standpoint rather
Charlotte Jessop: than a financial one. I got married when I was
Charlotte Jessop: 26 and I knew that I wanted to start a
Charlotte Jessop: family pretty much straight away, and that was what I
Charlotte Jessop: did. A year later, I had my first daughter and
Charlotte Jessop: then I had another one two years after that. And
Charlotte Jessop: my finances at that time, I had not long bought
Charlotte Jessop: a house before that. I just finished paying for a wedding
Charlotte Jessop: and my finances probably weren't rosy. When I sit down
Charlotte Jessop: and look at the money I have now, I sit down and think, "
Charlotte Jessop: Oh, it'd probably be a lot easier now." But I
Charlotte Jessop: think the reality is that if you sit there and
Charlotte Jessop: you try and rationalise every decision you're going to make,
Charlotte Jessop: there's never a right time because if it's not the
Charlotte Jessop: finances that are stopping you, it's the things that you enjoy.
Charlotte Jessop: It's like, " Oh, I want to travel." Or " I want
Charlotte Jessop: to buy a house." So there want to always be something that stands
Charlotte Jessop: in your way of making that decision to be a
Charlotte Jessop: parent. Try not to wait for perfection. You just got
Charlotte Jessop: to take a little bit of a leap and figure
Charlotte Jessop: the rest out on the way.
Kia: That's really comforting to hear because knowing that there is
Kia: no right time just gives you that confidence to say, "
Kia: Whenever you feel like you want to do it, just
Kia: do it." We've spoken about it before on a podcast
Kia: about the legal and general research that revealed some key
Kia: milestones. Like parenthood is being delayed and the average age
Kia: of having a baby is later than it ever has
Kia: been at 32 years old. So I want to ask
Kia: you, why do you think that is?
Charlotte Jessop: Do you think there are some personal development that happens
Charlotte Jessop: at some point around when you turn 30? There may
Charlotte Jessop: be changes in your perspective on life and family and
Charlotte Jessop: that sort of thing. But also there are some things
Charlotte Jessop: that we've already touched on, things like career. I was
Charlotte Jessop: fortunate that I entered a career that allowed me to
Charlotte Jessop: progress fairly quickly. And I felt that was in a
Charlotte Jessop: strong place. That isn't the same for everybody. It can
Charlotte Jessop: take a few years to find a career that's right
Charlotte Jessop: for you. Education, more people are going to university, doing
Charlotte Jessop: postgraduate study as well. So all of those things make
Charlotte Jessop: a difference. And also when we look at finances, it's
Charlotte Jessop: been a rough few years.
Kia: It's been rough. It's been rough.
Charlotte Jessop: We look at the likes of COVID. We've also got
Charlotte Jessop: things like the cost of living crisis and this has
Charlotte Jessop: made things more expensive and people I think are potentially
Charlotte Jessop: waiting for those things to maybe settle down. House prices
Charlotte Jessop: are huge now. So it makes sense for people to
Charlotte Jessop: want to feel a little bit more secure in their
Charlotte Jessop: financial situation, but also these personal development milestones that I
Charlotte Jessop: think as women we have more freedoms. We were able
Charlotte Jessop: to make bigger and better strides in our careers than
Charlotte Jessop: my parents, than their parents were. So actually there's a
Charlotte Jessop: real sense of wanting to take advantage of that. So yeah, I think
Charlotte Jessop: there's a whole host of reasons. And I completely understand
Charlotte Jessop: why people would want to delay that.
Kia: There is such a big shift between generations that if
Kia: you just take my parents versus me. So my parents
Kia: had me at 24. I'm 26, and I cannot even
Kia: fathom having a child right now because where I am in my career
Kia: and things I want to achieve. So yeah, I think
Kia: it's a different world that we're living in. Absolutely. So
Kia: let's talk about finances then. Our favorite topic to talk
Kia: about. So as a parent yourself, can you talk us
Kia: through some of the financial impacts of having a baby?
Kia: So more so the short- term costs when they're younger,
Kia: what are some of the costs that we can expect when
Kia: you have a baby?
Charlotte Jessop: So I think this is what most people focus on.
Charlotte Jessop: You're like, " I'm having a baby." And you kind of
Charlotte Jessop: get very caught up in this bit. And actually it's
Charlotte Jessop: kind of fleeting. So they are going to need some clothes
Charlotte Jessop: and they are going to rapidly grow out of those
Charlotte Jessop: clothes as well. So I always urge people to go
Charlotte Jessop: second hand for things particularly like those newborn clothes because
Charlotte Jessop: it could be a week and they're done.
Kia: A week?
Charlotte Jessop: So clothes is obviously a main one, but lots of
Charlotte Jessop: people buy that for you, and it's their number one thing
Charlotte Jessop: to buy. You need things like car seats, and that's
Charlotte Jessop: probably one of the few costs that you can't really
Charlotte Jessop: avoid because recommended that you buy those sorts of things
Charlotte Jessop: brand new so that you know they haven't been in
Charlotte Jessop: accidents and stuff like that. Then you have to get
Charlotte Jessop: this kid out and about. You might want some sort
Charlotte Jessop: of push chair or I was quite a fan of
Charlotte Jessop: baby wrapping. And then you have things like feeding. So
Charlotte Jessop: depending on how you choose to feed your child, you
Charlotte Jessop: might have costs involved there. And then there's things like
Charlotte Jessop: nappies and all of these sorts of things. And whether
Charlotte Jessop: you choose to go down a kind of disposable nappy
Charlotte Jessop: route or a reusable nappy route, both of those things
Charlotte Jessop: involve costs. On top of that, you're then going to want
Charlotte Jessop: to do stuff with your kid. And there's always a
Charlotte Jessop: societal pressure to get your kids out and about and
Charlotte Jessop: learning baby sign language or baby yoga. These are all
Charlotte Jessop: things that I did with my children. I look at
Charlotte Jessop: it now and I'm like, " Why on earth did they
Charlotte Jessop: think they could do yoga when they were three months old?"
Charlotte Jessop: But a lot of this is about socialising and that's
Charlotte Jessop: hugely important as a new parent to just get out
Charlotte Jessop: and meet other mums and that sort of thing. So
Charlotte Jessop: those are costs as well. And as they get older,
Charlotte Jessop: you then enter into things like the school years and
Charlotte Jessop: nursery and that sort of thing. And then there's I
Charlotte Jessop: think a significant proportion of the costs of having a
Charlotte Jessop: child is around childcare. So even if you take six
Charlotte Jessop: months a year off after you've had a child, you
Charlotte Jessop: are going to at some point pay out for childcare.
Charlotte Jessop: And there are ways that you can negate this or
Charlotte Jessop: reduce this in some way, but that is a significant cost
Charlotte Jessop: that I think is a huge factor in why people are
Charlotte Jessop: choosing to delay parenthood. When you send them off to
Charlotte Jessop: school, I look at my kids now, I basically need
Charlotte Jessop: to just redirect my salary to the school's bank account
Charlotte Jessop: because it's Christmas Jumper Day, it's anti- bullying week and
Charlotte Jessop: they got to wear yellow socks.
Kia: I used to love that school though. Mum give me
Kia: a pant. Guys, I love it.
Charlotte Jessop: So yeah, there's always a new thing. They've had a
Charlotte Jessop: school photo and you couldn't possibly not get that photo-
Kia: Of course.
Charlotte Jessop: ... because they're not smiling. So you still have to
Charlotte Jessop: pay for all of those things. And it's always something.
Charlotte Jessop: There's a school trip. My eldest daughter has recently signed
Charlotte Jessop: up to rock band lessons.
Kia: Wow.
Charlotte Jessop: So that's where my salary is probably going.
Kia: Is being directed. Wow.
Charlotte Jessop: So if she's not a rock star in the next 20 years-
Kia: I want to see her on the charts. She has to
Kia: be on the charts.
Charlotte Jessop: Yep. Yep, that's it.
Kia: Wow. The costs really do add up, but I don't
Kia: think that should be a reason to not have kids.
Kia: It's just being aware. You'd rather know than go into
Kia: something and have no idea. So I think that's all
Kia: we're trying to do. Just bring awareness to it, but
Kia: don't let that be a reason to not pursue-
Charlotte Jessop: Absolutely.
Kia: ... the joy that is parenthood. So what are some
Kia: of the considerations longer term that people should be thinking about?
Charlotte Jessop: What we need to maybe talk about here is the
Charlotte Jessop: things that are not so obvious. And this is things
Charlotte Jessop: like the costs of being on maternity leave. That was a
Charlotte Jessop: reduction for me, quite a significant reduction in my salary
Charlotte Jessop: to spend with my children in those early weeks and
Charlotte Jessop: months, but then that also then impacts longer term as
Charlotte Jessop: well. So it's at that point where women become mothers
Charlotte Jessop: that we start seeing bigger gaps in things like gender
Charlotte Jessop: pay gap, we start seeing pension gaps, savings gaps. It's
Charlotte Jessop: that point. Basically we don't see a huge difference in
Charlotte Jessop: these things until we get to that point where women
Charlotte Jessop: start having babies and that's when we start seeing the
Charlotte Jessop: divide between the two. So we need to be considering
Charlotte Jessop: the implications of this and putting things in place to
Charlotte Jessop: make sure that we are offsetting or working to ensure
Charlotte Jessop: that there's not a longer- term damage on those things.
Charlotte Jessop: And that can be hard. I definitely wasn't 26 years
Charlotte Jessop: old and expected my first child going, " We really must
Charlotte Jessop: talk about the pension gap." That wasn't something that I
Charlotte Jessop: was thinking about, but being able to do this and
Charlotte Jessop: raise awareness of these things means that maybe we can
Charlotte Jessop: bring to light some of these conversations and people can
Charlotte Jessop: start making changes towards their finances. So you can do
Charlotte Jessop: things like pay into your pension while you're on maternity
Charlotte Jessop: leave, but it doesn't necessarily end at mat leave. It
Charlotte Jessop: can be like what happens in terms of who's going
Charlotte Jessop: to look after the children? Is it going to be
Charlotte Jessop: that one parent goes part- time or quits work entirely?
Charlotte Jessop: And you then go down to a single income household.
Charlotte Jessop: What are the costs of that? But also what are
Charlotte Jessop: the risks of that? Because if you're a single income
Charlotte Jessop: household, then your finances are a lot more precarious than
Charlotte Jessop: a double income household. And some of these conversations need
Charlotte Jessop: to be had, particularly if you've got a partner that
Charlotte Jessop: you're going on this journey with, how do you build
Charlotte Jessop: back in that security and how do you build back in
Charlotte Jessop: that equity in that financial partnership? So those costs are
Charlotte Jessop: not easy to see, but they are still there, and
Charlotte Jessop: I think we're hearing more and more about them now.
Charlotte Jessop: I guess the other thing to say on this is
Charlotte Jessop: it's not all financial. There are either my mental workload
Charlotte Jessop: has increased significantly since having children. I need a PA
Charlotte Jessop: to manage the emails from my kids' school because there's
Charlotte Jessop: about 30 a day. But that creates a toll and
Charlotte Jessop: it might be that has an impact on some of
Charlotte Jessop: the other things that I'm able to do, whether it's
Charlotte Jessop: a hobby or whether it's paid work because those sorts
Charlotte Jessop: of things take up time.
Kia: I agree. I think it's good that we're having these
Kia: conversations because as women we need to be aware and
Kia: plan for that. So Charlotte, can you give any tips
Kia: for blending parenthood and your career?
Charlotte Jessop: Yes. This is an interesting one, isn't it? Because for
Charlotte Jessop: me, on a personal level I'm hugely career driven and
Charlotte Jessop: ambitious, but also I love being a parent. So I
Charlotte Jessop: have to find a way to make both of these
Charlotte Jessop: things work for me. And it's been a journey and
Charlotte Jessop: it hasn't always been easy. And there's definitely been moments
Charlotte Jessop: where I've had to choose one over the other. And
Charlotte Jessop: there's always a sense of guilt and that sort of
Charlotte Jessop: thing about it. I would say lean on your village.
Charlotte Jessop: And we talked about those baby classes where you're doing
Charlotte Jessop: baby sign language, it all feels pointless, well, those people
Charlotte Jessop: turned into my village. I took my oldest daughter to baby
Charlotte Jessop: sign language class and the woman that sat next to
Charlotte Jessop: me is now one of my best friends. Her son
Charlotte Jessop: goes to school with my daughter. She lives around the
Charlotte Jessop: corner from me and she will be like, " Can I
Charlotte Jessop: drop my kids off at your house and can you
Charlotte Jessop: take them to school for me today?" And I'll be like, "
Charlotte Jessop: Yeah, no problem. I'm going that way anyway." And then
Charlotte Jessop: the next day I'll be like, " Do you mind picking
Charlotte Jessop: up my kids because I'm a bit late coming back
Charlotte Jessop: from work?" And these people make the whole thing work.
Charlotte Jessop: And this can be friends, this can be family. And
Charlotte Jessop: having that village, having that group of people around you
Charlotte Jessop: that you can call upon really does make a huge
Charlotte Jessop: difference to the whole experience of having kids. I think
Charlotte Jessop: the other thing to think about is just to think
Charlotte Jessop: creatively about your options. And we mentioned about the cost
Charlotte Jessop: of childcare, and this is huge. And actually my ex-
Charlotte Jessop: husband and I, when we had little kids, we made
Charlotte Jessop: the decision to both work part- time rather than pay
Charlotte Jessop: for childcare. Not only did our kids have a parent
Charlotte Jessop: with them at all times, but also by working part-
Charlotte Jessop: time we were paying less tax due to things like
Charlotte Jessop: tax allowances, than if one of us had worked full-
Charlotte Jessop: time. And it's going to be different for every parent.
Charlotte Jessop: But yeah try not to just be like, " Best childcare
Charlotte Jessop: or nothing." There might be another thing.
Kia: There are great ways that you can kind of make things work which is good.
Charlotte Jessop: Absolutely.
Kia: It's good to hear. Before we wrap up this episode,
Kia: I want to ask you, what are your top three
Kia: tips if you'd like to have a child in the future?
Charlotte Jessop: So first one, don't go overboard on the baby stuffs
Charlotte Jessop: because they can be really cheap and they don't need
Charlotte Jessop: loads of things. The thing is, you love these kids
Charlotte Jessop: when you wanted to have all the best stuff, but
Charlotte Jessop: ultimately they don't need fancy trainers that cost you 200
Charlotte Jessop: quid. Particularly when they're seven years old they don't know.
Charlotte Jessop: So you could just get them cheap ones and they
Charlotte Jessop: can run through muddy puddles and live their best lives
Charlotte Jessop: like that. So don't go overboard on the baby stuff
Charlotte Jessop: and just kind of keep those costs in check. As
Charlotte Jessop: exciting as it is don't. The next one, and this
Charlotte Jessop: might be my favorite tip, is to choose your career
Charlotte Jessop: wisely. And I say that I'm not turning people away
Charlotte Jessop: from following their career dreams, but if you can make
Charlotte Jessop: choices about the job that you're in prior to entering
Charlotte Jessop: the journey of parenthood it can make or break the experience.
Charlotte Jessop: So I'm talking about things like does the company you're
Charlotte Jessop: working for, what is their mat leave like? That will
Charlotte Jessop: make a difference to the amount of money you have
Charlotte Jessop: in those early days. Things like what are the pensions
Charlotte Jessop: like in that job? Are you getting a good pension
Charlotte Jessop: out of that job? And things like remote working, all
Charlotte Jessop: of this is going to impact on your experience not
Charlotte Jessop: only during the parenting years but onwards. And I think
Charlotte Jessop: if you can be in the right place with your
Charlotte Jessop: career and you are in a job that you love and
Charlotte Jessop: has flexibility, it can literally be a game changer for
Charlotte Jessop: the whole experience. And then the last one is work
Charlotte Jessop: on your money stuff before you have a kid. So
Charlotte Jessop: this can mean doing things like increasing your pension's contributions.
Charlotte Jessop: It can be things like paying off debt. It can
Charlotte Jessop: be things like overpaying your mortgage. And the benefit of
Charlotte Jessop: this is twofold. Not only do you get the benefits
Charlotte Jessop: of increased pension and less mortgage and stuff like that,
Charlotte Jessop: but you also get used to having less money. So
Charlotte Jessop: when you're making those extra contributions you get all of
Charlotte Jessop: those perks and then when baby comes along and you
Charlotte Jessop: start your family, you can stop doing those things and
Charlotte Jessop: offset that money towards starting your family, and you'll be
Charlotte Jessop: in a stronger place for it and you won't miss
Charlotte Jessop: the cash when baby comes along because it was already
Charlotte Jessop: being spent-
Kia: It was already gone. Reallocated.
Charlotte Jessop: ... on something. Yeah. So I think if you can
Charlotte Jessop: do that, and it's always going to be a fine
Charlotte Jessop: balance. When do we stop doing all that money stuff
Charlotte Jessop: and when do we start having a kid? But essentially
Charlotte Jessop: if there's something you want to do you've got to
Charlotte Jessop: take the plunge eventually.
Kia: You have to take the plunge if you want to achieve it.
Kia: Yep. Charlotte, thank you so much. This has been such
Kia: an insightful episode, especially as me who doesn't have kids
Kia: yet, but wants kids in the future. This has been
Kia: a reassuring and informative episode. So thank you so much
Kia: for coming onto the podcast.
Charlotte Jessop: Thank you.
Kia: Thanks Charlotte. You've given us a lot to think about.
Kia: I'd love it if you could review the podcast, spread
Kia: the word, and help others get a little bit richer
Kia: too. Keep up with the show on TikTok and Instagram at Legal &
Kia: General. Thank you for listening. See you soon.