1 00:00:01,508 --> 00:00:02,420 Suze: We are 2 00:00:28,950 --> 00:00:33,889 Suze: July 10, 2025. Welcome everybody to the Women and Money podcast. 3 00:00:35,060 --> 00:00:38,049 KT: Everyone smart enough to listen. 4 00:00:38,220 --> 00:00:42,900 Suze: Are you all taking advantage of the Alliant Credit Union 5 00:00:42,900 --> 00:00:48,319 Suze: 12 month CD offer? You should go to myalliant.com 6 00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:54,889 Suze: and 12 month one year CD is at 4.3 APY 7 00:00:55,279 --> 00:01:00,400 Suze: and it's only for Suze listeners so special just for 8 00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:05,360 Suze: you so you best take advantage of it all right KT. 9 00:01:05,839 --> 00:01:09,480 KT: All right, my first question is from Caitlin. Hi Suze. 10 00:01:09,879 --> 00:01:11,830 Suze: Like Caitlin Clark. Oh, 11 00:01:12,080 --> 00:01:16,199 KT: Suze loves Caitlin Clark. Everyone loves Caitlin Clark. She changed 12 00:01:16,199 --> 00:01:18,470 KT: the whole face of women's basketball, didn't she? 13 00:01:18,959 --> 00:01:21,739 Suze: I love women's basketball. 14 00:01:22,400 --> 00:01:25,000 KT: I never liked it until she came on board because 15 00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:27,620 KT: I found it to be slow and boring compared to men, but she is extraordinary. 16 00:01:28,260 --> 00:01:32,080 Suze: Everyone should be grateful to her. And all the people that keep 17 00:01:32,080 --> 00:01:33,839 Suze: pushing her and knocking her down. 18 00:01:34,330 --> 00:01:36,750 Suze: You don't want her out of the game. You don't 19 00:01:36,750 --> 00:01:37,269 Suze: want that. 20 00:01:37,470 --> 00:01:38,559 KT: Don't hurt our girl... 21 00:01:38,989 --> 00:01:39,349 Suze: Don't do that. 22 00:01:39,550 --> 00:01:44,050 KT: OK, so from Caitlin. Hi Suze, is there a relationship 23 00:01:44,050 --> 00:01:46,378 KT: between oil and the stock market? 24 00:01:46,629 --> 00:01:51,029 Suze: It depends, KT. Sometimes people think there's like this inverse 25 00:01:51,029 --> 00:01:54,629 Suze: relationship between the stock market and oil, so they kind 26 00:01:54,629 --> 00:01:57,949 Suze: of think that when oil prices go up, then the 27 00:01:57,949 --> 00:02:00,550 Suze: stock market goes down and vice versa. 28 00:02:00,940 --> 00:02:04,940 Suze: And that logic is just very simple, but it isn't true. 29 00:02:05,190 --> 00:02:09,029 Suze: They think higher oil equals higher cost for companies, which 30 00:02:09,029 --> 00:02:12,470 Suze: means lower profits and da da da, but history doesn't 31 00:02:12,470 --> 00:02:17,149 Suze: back that up on any level. Sometimes they rise together. 32 00:02:17,929 --> 00:02:22,009 Suze: Because a strong economy, KT can also like increase the 33 00:02:22,008 --> 00:02:26,369 Suze: demand for oil, so for shipping, travel, manufacturing, all those 34 00:02:26,369 --> 00:02:30,388 Suze: things in a strong economy can also boost corporate earnings, 35 00:02:30,529 --> 00:02:35,329 Suze: lifting stock prices up. So like in 2006 and 2007 36 00:02:35,330 --> 00:02:36,990 Suze: you're going to yell at me for going on too 37 00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:40,960 Suze: long about this simple question, but oil prices, do you 38 00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:44,449 Suze: remember this, they rose so sharply. 39 00:02:45,029 --> 00:02:50,270 Suze: And the S&P 500 index was also just totally... It 40 00:02:50,270 --> 00:02:55,428 Suze: was skyrocketing. Why? Because the economy was roaring. 41 00:02:55,919 --> 00:02:57,880 Suze: So they both were doing well... 42 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:01,320 KT: Is that when the price of gas was like over the... off the charts? 43 00:03:01,800 --> 00:03:02,350 Suze: Off the charts. 44 00:03:02,350 --> 00:03:04,559 KT: like 4 or $5 45 00:03:04,559 --> 00:03:10,509 Suze: But sometimes KT they go in opposite directions. In 2011, 46 00:03:10,839 --> 00:03:13,589 Suze: do you remember when all this unrest was in the 47 00:03:13,589 --> 00:03:17,809 Suze: Middle East and it pushed up oil so much and 48 00:03:17,809 --> 00:03:22,800 Suze: then stocks pulled back temporarily, but it was always just temporarily. 49 00:03:23,250 --> 00:03:25,929 Suze: So here's the bottom line that was a very long 50 00:03:25,929 --> 00:03:32,919 Suze: answer to no. Oil and stocks aren't consistently inverse or together. 51 00:03:33,130 --> 00:03:36,589 Suze: It all depends on what's going on, all right, just 52 00:03:36,589 --> 00:03:37,360 Suze: that simple. 53 00:03:37,850 --> 00:03:41,330 KT: OK, next question is from Anita and I think that 54 00:03:41,330 --> 00:03:45,809 KT: many people listening may find themselves in this dilemma. She 55 00:03:45,809 --> 00:03:47,649 KT: said hello Suze Orman. 56 00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:53,039 KT: I am 68. I lost my partner after he retired 57 00:03:53,039 --> 00:03:57,610 KT: and passed 4 years ago. I made so many financial 58 00:03:57,610 --> 00:04:00,630 KT: mistakes trying to do the right thing, maybe the old 59 00:04:00,630 --> 00:04:01,750 KT: fashioned way. 60 00:04:02,220 --> 00:04:07,570 KT: In 2022 I was told the interest rate was increasing, 61 00:04:07,740 --> 00:04:12,210 KT: the housing prices would decrease, and I would be in trouble, 62 00:04:12,580 --> 00:04:17,049 KT: so I sold and entered the worst time to rent 63 00:04:17,049 --> 00:04:19,019 KT: before trying to buy again. 64 00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:22,320 KT: So now let me give everyone a little backstory here. 65 00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:27,190 KT: Anita has two children, one is in California, one is 66 00:04:27,190 --> 00:04:31,808 KT: in Washington state, and she's weighing in that if she 67 00:04:32,238 --> 00:04:37,239 KT: was to buy a home in California, for instance, she 68 00:04:37,238 --> 00:04:40,570 KT: said she can put 20% down on a half plex 69 00:04:40,839 --> 00:04:44,750 KT: that needs to be remodeled in a nice lakeside community, 70 00:04:45,079 --> 00:04:49,079 KT: a little remote for under 400. All right, ready? 71 00:04:49,570 --> 00:04:52,170 KT: Or I can buy a newer one that is a 72 00:04:52,170 --> 00:04:57,769 KT: tight duplex for over 400 in Washington state where prices 73 00:04:57,769 --> 00:05:02,209 KT: are increasing and most homes are over 550, she said, 74 00:05:02,290 --> 00:05:06,320 KT: and it rains a lot there, so she said, any thoughts? 75 00:05:06,488 --> 00:05:09,970 KT: Should I continue to rent and continue to wait until 76 00:05:09,970 --> 00:05:12,290 KT: the economy changes or do something? 77 00:05:12,678 --> 00:05:17,000 KT: So she's renting and paying in rent more than what 78 00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:20,579 KT: her mortgage payment was on a house she sold, but 79 00:05:20,579 --> 00:05:21,399 KT: kind of kicking herself. 80 00:05:21,399 --> 00:05:24,440 Suze: You can't kick yourself, you know, there's a lot of 81 00:05:24,440 --> 00:05:28,589 Suze: money which is you cannot look at what you had. 82 00:05:29,079 --> 00:05:33,039 Suze: You have to look at what you have comparing to 83 00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:36,799 Suze: something that was years ago versus now just makes no 84 00:05:36,799 --> 00:05:40,269 Suze: sense because everything has gone up so much in value. 85 00:05:40,678 --> 00:05:41,760 Suze: Here's the thing. 86 00:05:42,029 --> 00:05:46,130 Suze: You know you lost your partner four years ago and 87 00:05:46,130 --> 00:05:49,679 Suze: sometimes and that's why I always say to everybody that 88 00:05:49,678 --> 00:05:52,690 Suze: you are to do nothing other than to stay safe 89 00:05:52,690 --> 00:05:56,250 Suze: and sound for at least six months to one year, 90 00:05:56,329 --> 00:05:59,369 Suze: preferably two years after you have suffered the loss of 91 00:05:59,369 --> 00:06:02,760 Suze: a loved one because when you do make a move, 92 00:06:03,049 --> 00:06:05,929 Suze: it's a move like this and you made a mistake. 93 00:06:06,290 --> 00:06:10,010 Suze: But all right, you made a mistake. You now can't 94 00:06:10,010 --> 00:06:11,969 Suze: afford to make another one. 95 00:06:12,519 --> 00:06:16,040 Suze: So Anita, you really need to ask yourself the question, 96 00:06:16,290 --> 00:06:19,329 Suze: do you like where you're living right now? Forget about 97 00:06:19,329 --> 00:06:22,769 Suze: what you're spending versus what you used to spend. Can 98 00:06:22,769 --> 00:06:27,850 Suze: you afford renting? Because trust me, renting has its advantages 99 00:06:27,850 --> 00:06:30,909 Suze: as well. When something breaks, you need a new refrigerator, 100 00:06:31,089 --> 00:06:34,799 Suze: whatever it is, you don't have to fix anything. You 101 00:06:34,799 --> 00:06:39,369 Suze: are not responsible for anything, so you are now 68. 102 00:06:40,040 --> 00:06:44,828 Suze: And you will get older and older and some... hopefully 103 00:06:44,829 --> 00:06:50,589 Suze: and hopefully and sometimes owning a home is a big deal. 104 00:06:50,678 --> 00:06:54,589 Suze: Also when you buy a home, you never quite know 105 00:06:54,959 --> 00:06:58,799 Suze: what you are really buying. Like does it leak? Will 106 00:06:58,799 --> 00:07:02,440 Suze: the plumbing need to be replaced? All of these things. 107 00:07:02,519 --> 00:07:05,829 Suze: So first question you have to ask and answer yourself. 108 00:07:06,170 --> 00:07:07,600 Suze: Do you like where you're renting? 109 00:07:08,190 --> 00:07:09,940 Suze: Can you afford it comfortably? 110 00:07:10,690 --> 00:07:14,790 Suze: And if so, continue to rent. You don't have to 111 00:07:14,790 --> 00:07:18,589 Suze: make a decision because your rent is more than what 112 00:07:18,589 --> 00:07:23,630 Suze: your mortgage payment was years ago. That's number one. Number two, 113 00:07:24,279 --> 00:07:27,820 Suze: you really need to think about where you want to 114 00:07:27,820 --> 00:07:32,579 Suze: move all right? And besides the house, is it in 115 00:07:32,579 --> 00:07:36,609 Suze: an area that it's walkable, it's easy for health care 116 00:07:36,609 --> 00:07:39,739 Suze: there's a community what is the maintenance? What are your 117 00:07:39,739 --> 00:07:41,380 Suze: neighbors like? You need to 118 00:07:41,570 --> 00:07:43,920 Suze: look at all of those things because if it's a 119 00:07:43,920 --> 00:07:47,649 Suze: duplex you're going to have somebody living next door to 120 00:07:47,649 --> 00:07:49,970 Suze: you and you're gonna hear them going up and down 121 00:07:49,970 --> 00:07:53,410 Suze: the stairs maybe they have kids, maybe they play their 122 00:07:53,410 --> 00:07:57,410 Suze: music loud, so you really really need to think about 123 00:07:57,410 --> 00:08:04,440 Suze: that OK. Also you need to understand what's happening with weather. 124 00:08:05,380 --> 00:08:08,940 Suze: When you own something and you don't own it outright, 125 00:08:09,100 --> 00:08:13,059 Suze: you do a mortgage on it all right, you're gonna 126 00:08:13,059 --> 00:08:18,779 Suze: have to have property insurance and property insurance today is 127 00:08:18,779 --> 00:08:21,700 Suze: so much more than it was when you owned your 128 00:08:21,700 --> 00:08:25,579 Suze: other house. I can't even tell. You so can you 129 00:08:25,579 --> 00:08:29,420 Suze: really afford what it's gonna cost you to live in 130 00:08:29,420 --> 00:08:34,409 Suze: this house property taxes, insurance, maintenance and everything. 131 00:08:34,919 --> 00:08:40,229 Suze: I'm not sure that you should absolutely do this all 132 00:08:40,229 --> 00:08:44,539 Suze: at once, all right? Just feels like you're rushing and 133 00:08:44,539 --> 00:08:47,579 Suze: thinking if you buy something now, it will take away 134 00:08:47,580 --> 00:08:49,419 Suze: the mistake you made then. 135 00:08:49,989 --> 00:08:53,069 Suze: Look at what you have, not at what you had. 136 00:08:53,070 --> 00:08:56,669 Suze: Right now, you have a lot of money making a 137 00:08:56,669 --> 00:09:00,940 Suze: good interest that you could invest and make even more money, 138 00:09:01,010 --> 00:09:03,750 Suze: and maybe that's better than owning a 139 00:09:03,750 --> 00:09:04,179 Suze: home. 140 00:09:04,390 --> 00:09:08,369 KT: All right. Suze, I currently have a revocable trust created 141 00:09:08,369 --> 00:09:12,710 KT: by an attorney. I am 60 but created this 10 142 00:09:12,710 --> 00:09:13,619 KT: years ago. 143 00:09:14,099 --> 00:09:17,750 KT: I want to make changes, but the attorney wants, ready... 144 00:09:18,059 --> 00:09:24,169 KT: $6000 to do that. Can I use your must-have document 145 00:09:24,169 --> 00:09:28,140 KT: program to create a new trust that will supersede the 146 00:09:28,140 --> 00:09:28,900 KT: prior one? 147 00:09:29,369 --> 00:09:34,010 KT: Not complicated, but something that you absolutely can do by 148 00:09:34,010 --> 00:09:37,049 KT: yourself on your own and save $6000. 149 00:09:37,650 --> 00:09:39,969 Suze: Yeah, I think $99 to buy it. 150 00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:41,449 KT: Must have documents... 151 00:09:41,450 --> 00:09:45,239 Suze: would be, yeah, would be easy. So go to must-havedocs.com 152 00:09:45,539 --> 00:09:47,450 Suze: and take a look. All right, go on, KT. 153 00:09:47,679 --> 00:09:51,289 KT: OK, next question is from Mandy. My husband and I 154 00:09:51,289 --> 00:09:57,960 KT: both have individual HSAs, health savings accounts that are just sitting. 155 00:09:58,289 --> 00:10:01,728 KT: We are currently maxing each year in our family plan. 156 00:10:02,090 --> 00:10:04,859 KT: What is your advice on investing the funds in the 157 00:10:04,859 --> 00:10:08,059 KT: HSA rather than letting it sit earning pennies on the 158 00:10:08,059 --> 00:10:08,539 KT: dollar? 159 00:10:08,609 --> 00:10:13,530 Suze: Oh, you should absolutely invest it. Every HSA, health savings account, 160 00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:19,049 Suze: comes with investments, whether they're 1000 of them, 15 of them, whatever. 161 00:10:19,419 --> 00:10:19,940 Suze: Contact your 162 00:10:20,049 --> 00:10:23,039 Suze: company, see what you can invest in, and you should 163 00:10:23,039 --> 00:10:24,949 Suze: be investing. All right, go on KT. 164 00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:29,049 KT: OK, this next one is another spicy question. I love these. 165 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:32,190 KT: This one's really good. This is from Michelle. She said, 166 00:10:32,280 --> 00:10:37,880 KT: hi Suze. She is 25 and he is 24. 167 00:10:38,330 --> 00:10:39,689 Suze: That's how she opens this email? 168 00:10:40,250 --> 00:10:43,000 KT: Yes, ma'am. Here is a little more background of the 169 00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:47,260 KT: pickle I've gotten myself into. My son was a senior 170 00:10:47,260 --> 00:10:50,189 KT: in high school when COVID hit. Real bummer for his 171 00:10:50,190 --> 00:10:53,359 KT: senior year. He went to college in the fall and 172 00:10:53,359 --> 00:10:57,760 KT: all his classes turned into online classes, which didn't work 173 00:10:57,760 --> 00:11:01,669 KT: for him. He didn't pass any classes and he moved home. 174 00:11:02,200 --> 00:11:04,799 KT: When he moved home, he got a job, built up 175 00:11:04,799 --> 00:11:08,010 KT: his savings. When he was ready to go back to school, 176 00:11:08,119 --> 00:11:10,919 KT: he decided to go to where my daughter had just 177 00:11:10,919 --> 00:11:15,320 KT: graduated and move into the house that I bought as 178 00:11:15,320 --> 00:11:17,669 KT: an investment while she was in school. 179 00:11:17,950 --> 00:11:20,380 KT: And Michelle goes on to tell us it was a 180 00:11:20,380 --> 00:11:24,339 KT: good investment. I've rented rooms to students that covers the 181 00:11:24,340 --> 00:11:28,210 KT: mortgage and my kid while going to school didn't have 182 00:11:28,210 --> 00:11:31,478 KT: to pay rent. Good. So Michelle did well with her daughter. 183 00:11:31,580 --> 00:11:32,510 Suze: Then what happened? 184 00:11:32,619 --> 00:11:37,739 KT: Then soon thereafter, his girlfriend wanted to move in with him. 185 00:11:38,059 --> 00:11:41,849 KT: She was living in our hometown, which is three hours away. 186 00:11:42,580 --> 00:11:45,739 KT: I should have done my due diligence, but since she 187 00:11:45,739 --> 00:11:49,700 KT: is my son's girlfriend, I said, OK. She signed a 188 00:11:49,700 --> 00:11:53,659 KT: lease agreement and was supposed to pay rent, but with 189 00:11:53,659 --> 00:11:58,140 KT: just sporadic jobs and other bills to pay, I've only 190 00:11:58,140 --> 00:12:02,859 KT: received sporadic rent payments. She's a good talker and makes 191 00:12:02,859 --> 00:12:06,359 KT: plans to get back on track with every job. As 192 00:12:06,359 --> 00:12:11,939 KT: of now she owes me over $4000 in back rent. 193 00:12:12,590 --> 00:12:16,000 KT: I found out she borrowed money from my son to 194 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:20,530 KT: help pay her bills. His nest egg is now gone, 195 00:12:20,909 --> 00:12:25,199 KT: and she's borrowed from other people too. It's an ugly 196 00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:29,479 KT: situation and hard on our family because it's my son's girlfriend. 197 00:12:30,090 --> 00:12:32,789 KT: If it was any other renter, they would have been 198 00:12:32,789 --> 00:12:37,090 KT: out of the house a long time ago. So Michelle 199 00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:40,049 KT: goes on to tell us she's a person who has 200 00:12:40,049 --> 00:12:45,609 KT: all sorts of big plans traveling, retiring early, etc., but 201 00:12:45,609 --> 00:12:49,330 KT: doesn't hold a job and has no money. I want 202 00:12:49,330 --> 00:12:52,598 KT: to give her something that could help her be realistic 203 00:12:52,599 --> 00:12:56,739 KT: and kick her into gear. I kick her somewhere else, Suze, 204 00:12:57,609 --> 00:12:59,449 KT: but I think that Michelle. 205 00:12:59,859 --> 00:13:00,840 KT: Is, um, 206 00:13:00,849 --> 00:13:01,250 Suze: I know exactly what she's 207 00:13:01,250 --> 00:13:01,729 Suze: saying 208 00:13:01,729 --> 00:13:02,559 KT: She's saying... 209 00:13:02,729 --> 00:13:05,069 Suze: I know exactly what I would tell Michelle. 210 00:13:06,330 --> 00:13:07,659 Suze: I don't care about this girl. 211 00:13:08,340 --> 00:13:10,150 KT: I don't think Michelle wants a daughter-in-law. 212 00:13:10,390 --> 00:13:13,830 Suze: Wait, listen to me. I care about her son, and 213 00:13:13,830 --> 00:13:18,539 Suze: her son is obviously making very bad choices right now. 214 00:13:19,390 --> 00:13:22,989 Suze: And since this is her son's girlfriend. 215 00:13:23,650 --> 00:13:26,429 Suze: I would tell them they both have to leave. Oh, 216 00:13:26,599 --> 00:13:28,799 Suze: I would say to both of them I would sit 217 00:13:28,799 --> 00:13:33,799 Suze: them down and I would say I am owed $4000 218 00:13:34,359 --> 00:13:38,599 Suze: in back rent. You, this woman, I would say, whatever 219 00:13:38,599 --> 00:13:42,080 Suze: her son's name is, I allowed your girlfriend to live 220 00:13:42,080 --> 00:13:44,959 Suze: here because I love you so much, but I don't 221 00:13:44,960 --> 00:13:51,200 Suze: love you enough to be down $4000. Therefore, the two 222 00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:53,439 Suze: of you need to leave. 223 00:13:54,090 --> 00:13:56,849 Suze: So that I can get rent for both of your 224 00:13:56,849 --> 00:14:02,369 Suze: places and make up for the $4000 deficit so you 225 00:14:02,369 --> 00:14:05,679 Suze: have 30 days to both be out of here. 226 00:14:05,969 --> 00:14:08,969 KT: And find your own place to live and figure it out. 227 00:14:08,609 --> 00:14:13,159 Suze: And that's it, right? And I'm not going back on this. 228 00:14:13,369 --> 00:14:16,369 Suze: This is how it is. You have to take responsibility 229 00:14:16,369 --> 00:14:19,210 Suze: that you are in a relationship with somebody who has 230 00:14:19,210 --> 00:14:21,969 Suze: been totally irresponsible, and I would say this in front 231 00:14:21,969 --> 00:14:22,440 Suze: of her. 232 00:14:23,010 --> 00:14:26,280 Suze: Therefore, if this is what you are choosing, then you 233 00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:29,520 Suze: have to choose to stick by her side and leave 234 00:14:29,520 --> 00:14:33,559 Suze: with her. You have 30 days to get out, and 235 00:14:33,559 --> 00:14:35,090 Suze: that is exactly what I would say. 236 00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:37,789 KT: I love that. That's great, great advice. 237 00:14:37,900 --> 00:14:39,510 Suze: That is exactly what I would say. 238 00:14:40,179 --> 00:14:43,679 KT: I love that. Yeah, good, Michelle, do it. 239 00:14:43,679 --> 00:14:46,320 Suze: Now, Michelle, it's gonna be very hard for you to 240 00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:47,679 Suze: do that because it's your son. 241 00:14:48,049 --> 00:14:53,780 Suze: But if you don't kick your son into common sense gear, 242 00:14:54,349 --> 00:14:57,909 Suze: he's gonna possibly get this woman pregnant. He's possibly going 243 00:14:57,909 --> 00:15:00,750 Suze: to end up having to marry her. He's never gonna 244 00:15:00,750 --> 00:15:03,429 Suze: have any money. That will be the biggest regret of 245 00:15:03,429 --> 00:15:06,710 Suze: his life, not your life necessarily, but his life. 246 00:15:07,750 --> 00:15:11,380 Suze: Kick it out now, or I'm telling you your son 247 00:15:11,380 --> 00:15:14,900 Suze: is going to pay. He obviously can't say no to her. 248 00:15:15,510 --> 00:15:18,570 Suze: Because he gave her all of his savings, are you 249 00:15:18,570 --> 00:15:21,950 Suze: kidding me? He's got to leave and figure out how 250 00:15:21,950 --> 00:15:25,250 Suze: to do it on his own now, just that simple. 251 00:15:25,760 --> 00:15:28,309 Suze: And when he says, no, no, Mom, mom, really will 252 00:15:28,309 --> 00:15:30,150 Suze: come up with the money and say, sorry, my mind 253 00:15:30,150 --> 00:15:33,510 Suze: is made up. Both of you have to go. That's 254 00:15:33,510 --> 00:15:34,039 Suze: it. 255 00:15:34,349 --> 00:15:36,330 KT: If you can come up with that money, then that's 256 00:15:36,330 --> 00:15:40,340 KT: plenty of money for you to rent elsewhere. Be stern 257 00:15:40,340 --> 00:15:41,080 KT: and strict. 258 00:15:42,190 --> 00:15:43,549 Suze: Then, if he says, but what if she goes and 259 00:15:43,549 --> 00:15:44,909 Suze: I stay? Sorry. 260 00:15:45,330 --> 00:15:47,270 Suze: Right, you want to do that to your girlfriend. Why 261 00:15:47,270 --> 00:15:49,710 Suze: would you want to do that to your girlfriend? You 262 00:15:49,710 --> 00:15:51,940 Suze: can't do that to your girlfriend unless you break up 263 00:15:51,940 --> 00:15:55,429 Suze: with your girlfriend. So you should just be really straight 264 00:15:55,429 --> 00:15:57,429 Suze: with him. This is going to be the hardest thing 265 00:15:57,429 --> 00:16:00,109 Suze: you've ever had to do, but guess what? I have 266 00:16:00,109 --> 00:16:04,070 Suze: a feeling. Think about that $4000. Think about what you're 267 00:16:04,070 --> 00:16:07,780 Suze: saving your son from, and you can do it. 268 00:16:08,559 --> 00:16:11,400 KT: So Suze, this is my last question. This is gonna be a short... 269 00:16:11,400 --> 00:16:12,000 Suze: What do you mean it's your last question? 270 00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:18,010 KT: It's the middle of July. I'm doing a summer shorty today. Why? 271 00:16:18,359 --> 00:16:21,090 KT: It is the most gorgeous day on Earth, and I'm 272 00:16:21,090 --> 00:16:24,650 KT: taking Suze for a boat ride. Everyone, I'm taking her 273 00:16:24,929 --> 00:16:29,210 KT: for a boat breakfast adventure, and that's all I'm gonna 274 00:16:29,210 --> 00:16:33,250 KT: tell her. So here's my last question. Dear Suze... 275 00:16:33,489 --> 00:16:35,929 Suze: You should see my face, everybody. All right, go on. 276 00:16:37,030 --> 00:16:39,609 KT: Um, uh, I like this question. Thank you for all 277 00:16:39,609 --> 00:16:43,719 KT: you and KT do. I handle the finances for our family, 278 00:16:43,969 --> 00:16:47,770 KT: and I so appreciate everything I've learned from you. I 279 00:16:47,770 --> 00:16:50,880 KT: hope you might be able to help me with this question, 280 00:16:51,210 --> 00:16:53,890 KT: and this is from Lynn. She said, My daughter and 281 00:16:53,890 --> 00:16:57,719 KT: her partner are about to have their first child. 282 00:16:58,090 --> 00:17:02,830 KT: They are each taking two months unpaid leave. Our daughter 283 00:17:02,830 --> 00:17:06,770 KT: will then return to her freelance work, and our daughter-in-law 284 00:17:06,770 --> 00:17:11,599 KT: will begin nursing school. They are both admirable young people. 285 00:17:11,910 --> 00:17:16,089 KT: They're asking for our help, paying for child care beginning 286 00:17:16,089 --> 00:17:20,300 KT: in January, perhaps $1500 a month. 287 00:17:20,910 --> 00:17:24,069 KT: This is something we can afford to do, and we 288 00:17:24,069 --> 00:17:27,790 KT: have been very generous and helpful in the past. Where 289 00:17:27,790 --> 00:17:30,909 KT: I stumble is in the feeling that they should be 290 00:17:30,910 --> 00:17:34,829 KT: living within their means and wondering what we are teaching 291 00:17:34,829 --> 00:17:38,869 KT: them by being so generous. I'd love to know your 292 00:17:38,869 --> 00:17:41,270 KT: thoughts sincerely, Lynn. 293 00:17:41,939 --> 00:17:46,510 Suze: So KT, this one's a little confusing to me, right? 294 00:17:46,790 --> 00:17:48,660 KT: I don't think it's confusing at all. 295 00:17:48,869 --> 00:17:50,429 Suze: Well, it's confusing to me... 296 00:17:50,439 --> 00:17:55,660 KT: Lynn and her husband clearly have, you know, plenty of money. 297 00:17:56,189 --> 00:18:00,000 KT: And they have been very generous to their children, obviously, 298 00:18:00,290 --> 00:18:03,810 KT: she said we've been very generous in the past and 299 00:18:03,810 --> 00:18:06,930 KT: we would like to continue helping them. We can afford 300 00:18:06,930 --> 00:18:10,729 KT: to help them, but her dilemma is that she is 301 00:18:10,729 --> 00:18:12,290 KT: a Suze student. 302 00:18:12,584 --> 00:18:17,194 KT: And she's asking you this question; am I hurting by 303 00:18:17,194 --> 00:18:20,324 KT: helping or am I helping by hurting? 304 00:18:20,364 --> 00:18:23,354 Suze: I understood that when you read it, KT but this... 305 00:18:23,354 --> 00:18:27,145 Suze: Lynn is having issues with money, right? You can just, 306 00:18:27,155 --> 00:18:31,064 Suze: you just, just feel it. So Lynn, the real question 307 00:18:31,064 --> 00:18:37,274 Suze: is why, what's going on in your life that you 308 00:18:37,275 --> 00:18:40,675 Suze: feel like all of a sudden you wanna pull back here. 309 00:18:41,270 --> 00:18:44,719 Suze: Because if you feel like the fact that you even 310 00:18:44,719 --> 00:18:48,958 Suze: asked me this question "where I stumble is in feeling 311 00:18:48,959 --> 00:18:52,599 Suze: that they should be living within their means," says to 312 00:18:52,599 --> 00:18:57,478 Suze: me that they're living a really great lifestyle on your 313 00:18:57,479 --> 00:19:04,560 Suze: money and you don't like it and therefore I think 314 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:07,439 Suze: did they just assume when they had their child that 315 00:19:07,439 --> 00:19:08,800 Suze: you were going to take care of it? 316 00:19:09,479 --> 00:19:11,660 Suze: Did they not have a plan of what it would 317 00:19:11,660 --> 00:19:15,780 Suze: actually cost them to do so, and are they just 318 00:19:15,780 --> 00:19:19,329 Suze: taking it for granted that you're going to step in 319 00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:24,349 Suze: and give them $1500 a month? What KT? 320 00:19:24,579 --> 00:19:27,699 KT: Well, if you take a look at this carefully, one 321 00:19:27,699 --> 00:19:32,449 KT: of the girls is going back to nursing school. The 322 00:19:32,449 --> 00:19:39,020 KT: other one is going back to freelancing. They obviously can't afford. 323 00:19:39,800 --> 00:19:42,379 KT: To both go to work and have a child. 324 00:19:42,709 --> 00:19:45,060 Suze: Well, didn't they think about that before they had a child? 325 00:19:46,229 --> 00:19:49,560 Suze: Because it's not like, I mean, with the due respect, 326 00:19:49,630 --> 00:19:52,670 Suze: and I can say this, it's two women. It's like 327 00:19:52,670 --> 00:19:56,260 Suze: they tried to get pregnant. It's not like it just 328 00:19:56,260 --> 00:19:57,839 Suze: happened and now all of a sudden one of them 329 00:19:57,839 --> 00:20:01,550 Suze: is pregnant, right, which can happen and seriously between a 330 00:20:01,550 --> 00:20:03,349 Suze: man and a woman, and now you're pregnant, what are 331 00:20:03,349 --> 00:20:04,060 Suze: you gonna do? 332 00:20:04,810 --> 00:20:10,290 Suze: Here these two they planned the child, but they did 333 00:20:10,290 --> 00:20:13,930 Suze: not plan how to pay for the child and I 334 00:20:13,930 --> 00:20:17,050 Suze: think where Lynn is feeling a little bit upset. 335 00:20:17,630 --> 00:20:22,419 Suze: Is that now it's almost as if they don't have 336 00:20:22,420 --> 00:20:27,180 Suze: a choice. They're asking for her help to pay for 337 00:20:27,180 --> 00:20:32,229 Suze: child care beginning in perhaps the $1500 a month. 338 00:20:32,380 --> 00:20:33,369 KT: So they're asking... 339 00:20:33,369 --> 00:20:37,390 Suze: Here's what I don't understand why are they each taking 340 00:20:37,390 --> 00:20:41,219 Suze: two months of unpaid leave? That's what I would be 341 00:20:41,219 --> 00:20:42,060 Suze: upset about. 342 00:20:42,770 --> 00:20:48,250 Suze: Why doesn't just one take leave the mother that had 343 00:20:48,250 --> 00:20:52,849 Suze: the baby and the other one should continue working to 344 00:20:52,849 --> 00:20:57,050 Suze: make money to save that money to pay for child 345 00:20:57,050 --> 00:21:00,448 Suze: care when the other one has to go back to 346 00:21:00,449 --> 00:21:02,530 Suze: wherever they're going back to because I don't know which one... 347 00:21:02,530 --> 00:21:04,859 KT: We don't know which, yeah, we don't know which one... 348 00:21:05,729 --> 00:21:07,770 Suze: So, I have to tell you, Lynn, I would have 349 00:21:07,770 --> 00:21:09,329 Suze: a serious talk with them. 350 00:21:09,849 --> 00:21:11,839 Suze: And I would have a talk with them. Who did 351 00:21:11,839 --> 00:21:14,040 Suze: you think was going to pay for this when you 352 00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:19,310 Suze: decided to have a child? Why are you both taking leave? 353 00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:23,399 Suze: Like how can we cut your expenses so that in 354 00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:26,760 Suze: fact you can afford to pay for childcare. There's more 355 00:21:26,760 --> 00:21:29,639 Suze: going on. I'm so sorry. I don't know what else 356 00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:30,478 Suze: Lynn is dealing with. 357 00:21:30,930 --> 00:21:35,839 KT: I think Lynn feels like she is a bank instead 358 00:21:35,839 --> 00:21:37,069 KT: of a grandmother. 359 00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:39,468 Suze: That's actually a great idea, KT. 360 00:21:40,390 --> 00:21:44,250 Suze: If Lynn feels like she's a bank, then she needs 361 00:21:44,250 --> 00:21:47,930 Suze: to act like a bank, and if she decides that 362 00:21:47,930 --> 00:21:52,770 Suze: she's going to help them with $1500 a month, it 363 00:21:52,770 --> 00:21:56,729 Suze: needs to be a loan, not a gift, and she 364 00:21:56,729 --> 00:22:01,729 Suze: should have a contract drawn up seriously where when our 365 00:22:01,729 --> 00:22:04,129 Suze: payments due on this loan. 366 00:22:04,849 --> 00:22:08,229 Suze: And at what interest rate and they both need to 367 00:22:08,229 --> 00:22:12,660 Suze: sign it. It needs to be like a legal contract. 368 00:22:13,380 --> 00:22:16,979 Suze: And that Lynn maybe will give them two years to 369 00:22:16,979 --> 00:22:18,810 Suze: start making payments on it. 370 00:22:19,560 --> 00:22:22,520 Suze: Right, because in that period of time it's gonna be 371 00:22:22,520 --> 00:22:28,619 Suze: like $36,000 Lynn, that you will have paid for them 372 00:22:29,079 --> 00:22:32,439 Suze: and so then I would take that $36,000 and I 373 00:22:32,439 --> 00:22:36,239 Suze: would demand payments on it over X amount of years, 374 00:22:36,290 --> 00:22:39,280 Suze: maybe over the next five years they need to pay 375 00:22:39,280 --> 00:22:42,869 Suze: that back to you, but whatever feels good to you, 376 00:22:43,160 --> 00:22:47,310 Suze: but seriously you need to have a talk with them 377 00:22:47,599 --> 00:22:49,079 Suze: and then you decide. 378 00:22:49,439 --> 00:22:52,659 Suze: But they planned to have a child, but they didn't 379 00:22:52,660 --> 00:22:55,790 Suze: plan to pay for the child, and they just assumed 380 00:22:55,790 --> 00:22:59,540 Suze: you were going to. What have you done in your 381 00:22:59,540 --> 00:23:03,709 Suze: relationship with them that allowed them to even think that way? 382 00:23:03,900 --> 00:23:08,569 Suze: How did you create this situation? Just something for you 383 00:23:08,569 --> 00:23:11,579 Suze: to think about, you know, Lynn sounds like somebody who 384 00:23:11,579 --> 00:23:14,449 Suze: she always steps in to help somebody who's in need. 385 00:23:14,660 --> 00:23:16,659 Suze: Just sounds that way to me anyway. 386 00:23:17,359 --> 00:23:18,010 Suze: That's it, huh, KT? 387 00:23:18,160 --> 00:23:19,919 KT: I think that's a wrap, Suze. 388 00:23:20,079 --> 00:23:21,000 Suze: Where are we going? 389 00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,209 KT: I'm taking you for a great adventure. 390 00:23:23,209 --> 00:23:25,010 Suze: I'm the one who drives the boat. 391 00:23:25,170 --> 00:23:28,430 KT: You will drive, but I'm taking you to the destination. 392 00:23:28,810 --> 00:23:30,040 Suze: And you have it in mind? 393 00:23:30,599 --> 00:23:30,656 KT: Yes. 394 00:23:30,656 --> 00:23:31,750 Suze: Are you bringing food? 395 00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:32,108 KT: Yes. 396 00:23:32,108 --> 00:23:35,439 Suze: Oh, that's all that mattered. My, my coffee and my 397 00:23:35,439 --> 00:23:36,390 Suze: raisin toast? 398 00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:37,033 KT: Yes. 399 00:23:37,033 --> 00:23:39,760 Suze: All right, all right, so everybody, that's it. You get 400 00:23:39,760 --> 00:23:42,639 Suze: a break from us right now. So until... 401 00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:43,719 KT: It's called a sunrise shorty today. 402 00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:48,680 Suze: So until Sunday. There's only one thing that I want 403 00:23:48,680 --> 00:23:50,560 Suze: you to remember when it comes to your money. What 404 00:23:50,560 --> 00:23:51,400 Suze: is that KT? 405 00:23:51,959 --> 00:23:54,760 KT: People first, then money, then things. 406 00:23:54,839 --> 00:23:57,329 Suze: Now you stay safe. Bye bye.