1 00:00:02,940 --> 00:00:02,960 Music: Music (in). 2 00:00:28,709 --> 00:00:34,990 Suze: June 18th, 2023. Welcome everybody to the Women and Money 3 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:40,479 Suze: podcast as well as everybody. Smart enough to listen, Suze 4 00:00:40,490 --> 00:00:42,180 Suze: O here and today... 5 00:00:42,869 --> 00:00:46,799 Suze: today is Father's Day. 6 00:00:47,630 --> 00:00:51,020 Suze: And so first of all, KT and I both wish 7 00:00:51,029 --> 00:00:54,979 Suze: all of you fathers out there a very, very happy 8 00:00:54,990 --> 00:00:57,479 Suze: Father's Day and 9 00:00:58,240 --> 00:01:01,490 Suze: fathers especially my father 10 00:01:02,330 --> 00:01:08,260 Suze: had a lot to do with me becoming Suze Orman truthfully. 11 00:01:08,959 --> 00:01:12,459 Suze: And I think back on my life and I sometimes 12 00:01:12,470 --> 00:01:17,580 Suze: wonder how did I become who I am today? How 13 00:01:17,589 --> 00:01:20,069 Suze: did all of this happen? Like it really wasn't meant 14 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:24,809 Suze: to happen, everybody because if I think back on my life, 15 00:01:24,819 --> 00:01:29,129 Suze: I grew up, I was dyslexic. I had a speech impediment. 16 00:01:29,290 --> 00:01:33,239 Suze: You know, I didn't get good grades. It's like nothing, 17 00:01:33,250 --> 00:01:36,089 Suze: I didn't have a really good education. Nothing. 18 00:01:36,620 --> 00:01:41,980 Suze: Nothing led to me becoming one of the world's personal 19 00:01:41,989 --> 00:01:45,129 Suze: finance experts. Nothing. 20 00:01:46,029 --> 00:01:49,040 Suze: And so when I think about it, I think about 21 00:01:49,050 --> 00:01:50,080 Suze: my father... 22 00:01:51,239 --> 00:01:55,919 Suze: My father, if I had to point to one thing. 23 00:01:56,449 --> 00:02:00,989 Suze: So today, I'd like to honor my father by telling 24 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:05,540 Suze: you his story, by telling you our story because it 25 00:02:05,550 --> 00:02:08,089 Suze: was 42 years ago today 26 00:02:08,768 --> 00:02:13,008 Suze: on Father's Day that my father who had been sick 27 00:02:13,018 --> 00:02:17,328 Suze: for a while, decided in my opinion, to take his 28 00:02:17,339 --> 00:02:18,598 Suze: own life. 29 00:02:19,309 --> 00:02:19,820 Suze: And 30 00:02:20,419 --> 00:02:23,520 Suze: it was an interesting story and I'll get to that. 31 00:02:24,020 --> 00:02:27,779 Suze: But I'd like to go back to the beginning to 32 00:02:27,788 --> 00:02:31,668 Suze: the beginning of what I learned from my father. 33 00:02:32,860 --> 00:02:36,750 Suze: And what I hope we all can learn on some 34 00:02:36,758 --> 00:02:40,678 Suze: level from our fathers, from our mothers, from our parents, 35 00:02:40,690 --> 00:02:42,919 Suze: no matter who they are or what they are. 36 00:02:43,720 --> 00:02:48,130 Suze: There's always something that we can learn from them 37 00:02:49,119 --> 00:02:53,198 Suze: and what we learn from them plays a vital role 38 00:02:54,059 --> 00:02:56,399 Suze: in who we become. 39 00:02:57,729 --> 00:03:01,259 Suze: So while there may be so many stories that I 40 00:03:01,270 --> 00:03:04,300 Suze: could tell you that I learned from my father when 41 00:03:04,309 --> 00:03:06,509 Suze: I was five when I was 10, when I was 42 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:10,399 Suze: 12 right around there. But this would then become a 43 00:03:10,410 --> 00:03:12,339 Suze: five hour podcast. 44 00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:19,660 Suze: I think my true lesson began with my father. When 45 00:03:19,669 --> 00:03:21,929 Suze: I was in the car, with my mother. 46 00:03:22,679 --> 00:03:24,330 Suze: We only had one car 47 00:03:24,919 --> 00:03:29,009 Suze: and we were driving to where my father worked, which 48 00:03:29,020 --> 00:03:33,100 Suze: was a little place called Chicken A Go Go. That 49 00:03:33,110 --> 00:03:36,550 Suze: was on the corner of 56th and Lake Park in 50 00:03:36,559 --> 00:03:39,399 Suze: High Park. And it was this tiny, I want to 51 00:03:39,410 --> 00:03:42,509 Suze: say it's like 400 square feet. That was it. 52 00:03:43,190 --> 00:03:46,100 Suze: And he made fried chicken there and ribs and things 53 00:03:46,110 --> 00:03:50,929 Suze: like that. And we drove up to pick him up 54 00:03:50,949 --> 00:03:56,169 Suze: and there, my father was standing outside of his little 55 00:03:56,179 --> 00:03:57,509 Suze: chicken shack 56 00:03:58,179 --> 00:04:01,509 Suze: that was totally on fire. 57 00:04:02,429 --> 00:04:05,460 Suze: And my mother and I both looked at each other 58 00:04:05,470 --> 00:04:07,279 Suze: and went, oh my God. 59 00:04:08,169 --> 00:04:13,179 Suze: And then in that exact same instance, my father, for 60 00:04:13,190 --> 00:04:19,480 Suze: whatever reason, ran back into this burning building and when 61 00:04:19,488 --> 00:04:21,940 Suze: I say it was burning, it was totally, 62 00:04:22,589 --> 00:04:27,489 Suze: totally engulfed in flames. And he runs back into the 63 00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:33,760 Suze: flames to grab a register, his cash register, which was 64 00:04:33,769 --> 00:04:36,279 Suze: all metal back in those days 65 00:04:36,890 --> 00:04:42,959 Suze: and he came out holding this register, he drops it 66 00:04:42,970 --> 00:04:46,558 Suze: down to the ground because it was scalding hot. 67 00:04:47,488 --> 00:04:48,738 Suze: And with that 68 00:04:49,399 --> 00:04:54,079 Suze: came the skin on his arms and his chest, 69 00:04:54,988 --> 00:05:00,529 Suze: he had third degree burns on the entire top of 70 00:05:00,540 --> 00:05:01,808 Suze: his body. 71 00:05:02,760 --> 00:05:07,928 Suze: And he ran into the fire. It turns out because 72 00:05:07,940 --> 00:05:12,399 Suze: every penny that he had to his name back then 73 00:05:12,730 --> 00:05:15,729 Suze: was in that cash register. 74 00:05:16,820 --> 00:05:20,470 Suze: And that's when I learned or I thought I learned 75 00:05:20,500 --> 00:05:26,428 Suze: the lesson that money was more important than life itself 76 00:05:26,440 --> 00:05:34,230 Suze: because I watched my father risk his life for money. 77 00:05:35,380 --> 00:05:38,880 Suze: And back then it was kind of interesting because I 78 00:05:38,890 --> 00:05:42,220 Suze: would always volunteer. I used to love hospitals. I always 79 00:05:42,230 --> 00:05:43,540 Suze: loved hospitals 80 00:05:44,149 --> 00:05:47,420 Suze: and I really wanted to be a doctor when I 81 00:05:47,428 --> 00:05:50,329 Suze: grew up. But my grades were never good enough. And 82 00:05:50,339 --> 00:05:53,229 Suze: when I went to the University of Illinois, they looked 83 00:05:53,238 --> 00:05:56,399 Suze: at my grades and everything and they said, no, we 84 00:05:56,410 --> 00:05:59,238 Suze: don't think this is a field that you should go into. 85 00:05:59,250 --> 00:06:02,690 Suze: You don't have what it takes. And I believed them, 86 00:06:03,119 --> 00:06:06,779 Suze: but that's besides the point. But because I always had 87 00:06:06,790 --> 00:06:09,940 Suze: this interest in hospitals for some reason, 88 00:06:10,519 --> 00:06:14,229 Suze: I always would volunteer at Michael Reese hospital, 89 00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:19,649 Suze: being a candy striper and I used to love it 90 00:06:19,660 --> 00:06:23,250 Suze: so much. Everybody I would dress up in my little uniform, 91 00:06:23,260 --> 00:06:26,570 Suze: which was red and white stripes that kind of went 92 00:06:26,579 --> 00:06:28,670 Suze: over a white, a white shirt 93 00:06:29,320 --> 00:06:31,140 Suze: and a little thing that you would wear on your 94 00:06:31,149 --> 00:06:34,200 Suze: hat and you would go from room to room and 95 00:06:34,209 --> 00:06:38,529 Suze: do little errands and anything you can do for the nurses. 96 00:06:39,079 --> 00:06:42,579 Suze: And because I would go there a lot on weekends 97 00:06:42,589 --> 00:06:46,349 Suze: when I wasn't going to school the doctors and everybody 98 00:06:46,359 --> 00:06:51,579 Suze: got to know me. Ok. Now my father is admitted 99 00:06:52,070 --> 00:06:54,350 Suze: into Michael Reese Hospital 100 00:06:55,010 --> 00:07:00,540 Suze: on the floor that I also was a candy striper on. 101 00:07:01,170 --> 00:07:06,510 Suze: And for some reason, for some reason, the doctors and 102 00:07:06,519 --> 00:07:10,859 Suze: the nurses thought I would be interested in watching them 103 00:07:10,869 --> 00:07:15,839 Suze: take off the bandages of my father's arms. 104 00:07:16,709 --> 00:07:22,890 Suze: And I was interested until I saw a sight that 105 00:07:22,899 --> 00:07:25,779 Suze: I would hope I would never see again in my life. 106 00:07:25,790 --> 00:07:29,230 Suze: And my father had blisters on his arms and I 107 00:07:29,239 --> 00:07:34,839 Suze: am not kidding everybody that were at least 12 inches high. 108 00:07:34,850 --> 00:07:36,859 Suze: All filled with liquid 109 00:07:37,709 --> 00:07:41,149 Suze: and their job was to cut them open and to 110 00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:44,600 Suze: let all the liquid drain out into buckets. 111 00:07:45,420 --> 00:07:50,440 Suze: And I just watched the look on my father's face 112 00:07:51,489 --> 00:07:52,850 Suze: and he was stoic 113 00:07:53,549 --> 00:07:54,950 Suze: and he was strong 114 00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:57,570 Suze: and he had a look of conviction, 115 00:07:58,220 --> 00:08:04,239 Suze: a conviction as probably the most painful period of his life. 116 00:08:04,250 --> 00:08:04,790 Suze: And 117 00:08:05,750 --> 00:08:08,410 Suze: rather than going, oh my God, this is horrible. Oh, 118 00:08:08,420 --> 00:08:11,640 Suze: look at what he's going through. I looked at him 119 00:08:11,649 --> 00:08:14,820 Suze: and I went, I want to be like that man. 120 00:08:15,459 --> 00:08:19,579 Suze: I wanna have conviction. I want to be strong. I 121 00:08:19,589 --> 00:08:24,950 Suze: wanna be like my father. That's what I wanna be like. 122 00:08:26,670 --> 00:08:33,159 Suze: And after that, however things would happen, you know, it 123 00:08:33,169 --> 00:08:37,598 Suze: was no secret that earlier on in my relationship with 124 00:08:37,609 --> 00:08:38,559 Suze: my father, 125 00:08:39,330 --> 00:08:42,460 Suze: he was abusive to me on many different levels. 126 00:08:43,419 --> 00:08:48,059 Suze: But at that moment in time, even though I so 127 00:08:48,068 --> 00:08:52,108 Suze: disliked him before that really everybody I did 128 00:08:53,030 --> 00:08:58,539 Suze: for many reasons in that moment in time, I wanted 129 00:08:58,549 --> 00:09:01,000 Suze: to be like him. 130 00:09:01,989 --> 00:09:06,580 Suze: And that was such a fascinating change for me. I 131 00:09:06,590 --> 00:09:08,000 Suze: can't even tell you. 132 00:09:08,719 --> 00:09:10,969 Suze: I then watched my father 133 00:09:11,679 --> 00:09:16,689 Suze: come down with emphysema by being caught in that fire. 134 00:09:17,690 --> 00:09:21,960 Suze: And it was also during that time that he was 135 00:09:21,969 --> 00:09:26,479 Suze: scared to death because his little shack burned down. There 136 00:09:26,489 --> 00:09:30,819 Suze: was no money. He had no idea how he was 137 00:09:30,830 --> 00:09:33,280 Suze: going to pay the bills or whatever. 138 00:09:34,039 --> 00:09:36,799 Suze: And that was during the time that my mother was 139 00:09:36,809 --> 00:09:41,559 Suze: also a legal secretary and was bringing in probably more money, 140 00:09:41,570 --> 00:09:45,250 Suze: believe it or not than my father. But then my 141 00:09:45,260 --> 00:09:50,429 Suze: mother during that time also was selling Avon on the 142 00:09:50,440 --> 00:09:53,570 Suze: side to generate extra money, 143 00:09:54,289 --> 00:09:58,689 Suze: but I saw that they were never ever going to 144 00:09:58,700 --> 00:09:59,700 Suze: give up. 145 00:10:00,940 --> 00:10:05,909 Suze: So here we are now, my father gets through this 146 00:10:05,919 --> 00:10:13,059 Suze: burn wise, but his emphysema becomes worse and worse and worse. 147 00:10:13,210 --> 00:10:18,090 Suze: And what was so fabulous financially that happened is that 148 00:10:18,250 --> 00:10:23,299 Suze: the people that had serviced my father, David Burg hot dogs, 149 00:10:23,309 --> 00:10:27,570 Suze: the chicken places, everything that he would buy his food 150 00:10:27,580 --> 00:10:29,309 Suze: from to then serve, 151 00:10:30,049 --> 00:10:36,939 Suze: gathered together and opened up a new place on 55th 152 00:10:36,950 --> 00:10:39,000 Suze: in Lake Park. I think that was where it was. 153 00:10:39,010 --> 00:10:41,250 Suze: I can't remember the names of the street right now 154 00:10:41,479 --> 00:10:45,700 Suze: and opened up a Maury's Deli for him. 155 00:10:46,820 --> 00:10:49,859 Suze: And so now he had the ability once he healed 156 00:10:49,869 --> 00:10:54,199 Suze: to make money again. However, even though he was able 157 00:10:54,210 --> 00:10:57,630 Suze: to make money again, as I had started to say, 158 00:10:57,640 --> 00:11:02,848 Suze: his emphysema was getting worse and worse and worse. 159 00:11:03,719 --> 00:11:10,968 Suze: And every night, I would hear him cough all night long, 160 00:11:11,099 --> 00:11:15,530 Suze: breathe in to this nebulizer machine that was motorized back then. 161 00:11:15,539 --> 00:11:18,119 Suze: It was however, they, they you plugged it in and 162 00:11:18,130 --> 00:11:20,109 Suze: it would have all these medicines in it that he 163 00:11:20,119 --> 00:11:21,369 Suze: would have to inhale. 164 00:11:22,349 --> 00:11:25,039 Suze: And every morning 165 00:11:25,950 --> 00:11:31,320 Suze: after him not sleeping for that entire night and him suffering, 166 00:11:32,619 --> 00:11:36,489 Suze: he would get up and he would go to work 167 00:11:36,500 --> 00:11:41,989 Suze: because he needed to provide for my mother as well 168 00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:46,460 Suze: as me. My two older brothers at this time were 169 00:11:46,469 --> 00:11:49,929 Suze: approximately four and seven years older than me. And they 170 00:11:49,940 --> 00:11:54,359 Suze: were essentially either about to graduate high school or already 171 00:11:54,369 --> 00:11:58,348 Suze: graduated in college. They were already kind of on their own. 172 00:11:59,119 --> 00:12:02,919 Suze: But even though they were on their own, they always, 173 00:12:02,929 --> 00:12:04,210 Suze: including me 174 00:12:04,929 --> 00:12:08,909 Suze: would go and help my father at Maury's Deli. It 175 00:12:08,919 --> 00:12:12,059 Suze: was our job to help him. And that is what 176 00:12:12,070 --> 00:12:14,890 Suze: I did every single day after school 177 00:12:15,510 --> 00:12:20,609 Suze: and on weekends. So when my friends would be going 178 00:12:20,619 --> 00:12:22,659 Suze: out and they would be playing or they would do 179 00:12:22,669 --> 00:12:27,968 Suze: whatever on a Saturday, Suze Orman went to work at 180 00:12:27,979 --> 00:12:29,718 Suze: Maury's Deli. 181 00:12:30,619 --> 00:12:34,189 Suze: And again, what I learned from my father was a 182 00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:38,709 Suze: work ethic that there was a saying in our house 183 00:12:38,719 --> 00:12:45,010 Suze: that "an Orman never gives up" and my father never ever, 184 00:12:45,020 --> 00:12:47,109 Suze: ever gave up 185 00:12:48,270 --> 00:12:49,460 Suze: no matter what. 186 00:12:50,890 --> 00:12:55,520 Suze: And I learned that from him because I can remember 187 00:12:55,530 --> 00:13:00,739 Suze: saying to myself, if my father can do what he's doing, 188 00:13:00,750 --> 00:13:04,929 Suze: going to work every day and coughing his brains out 189 00:13:04,940 --> 00:13:06,280 Suze: every single night, 190 00:13:07,330 --> 00:13:11,780 Suze: then nothing can stop me as well. 191 00:13:12,690 --> 00:13:17,140 Suze: And so a lot of my determination of not failing 192 00:13:18,789 --> 00:13:21,460 Suze: came from my father. 193 00:13:22,960 --> 00:13:25,880 Suze: And then as time would go on, 194 00:13:26,909 --> 00:13:31,940 Suze: my father loved the stock market, he loved it. 195 00:13:32,669 --> 00:13:36,340 Suze: And even though he really couldn't afford to participate much 196 00:13:36,349 --> 00:13:37,880 Suze: in it on any level, 197 00:13:38,570 --> 00:13:43,830 Suze: he just loved ordering something called value line. And at 198 00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:47,320 Suze: that time, it would come in these books and he 199 00:13:47,330 --> 00:13:52,679 Suze: would study every single stock. They were these yellowish type 200 00:13:52,690 --> 00:13:56,479 Suze: of pages big eight, you know, eight by 11 books 201 00:13:56,489 --> 00:14:00,000 Suze: and one by one, he would go through them and 202 00:14:00,010 --> 00:14:03,960 Suze: then he would write down the name of the stock 203 00:14:03,969 --> 00:14:05,140 Suze: that he should buy. 204 00:14:05,700 --> 00:14:08,960 Suze: And then he'd be, he was part of what was 205 00:14:08,969 --> 00:14:13,640 Suze: called the Mint Club where people would gather together and 206 00:14:13,650 --> 00:14:18,109 Suze: just small amounts of money they would invest so that 207 00:14:18,119 --> 00:14:21,659 Suze: they could be in the stock market as a club 208 00:14:21,690 --> 00:14:27,229 Suze: rather than buying individually, which obviously my father didn't quite do. 209 00:14:28,159 --> 00:14:32,169 Suze: And I would talk to him about the stock market 210 00:14:32,280 --> 00:14:35,909 Suze: and why he liked it and his love about it 211 00:14:36,650 --> 00:14:43,080 Suze: and watching his enthusiasm for the stock market 212 00:14:43,760 --> 00:14:48,570 Suze: really sparked that in me as well, believe it or not. 213 00:14:49,210 --> 00:14:53,450 Suze: And even though I put that spark on a shelf 214 00:14:53,460 --> 00:14:57,500 Suze: and it didn't come to play until 1980 215 00:14:58,409 --> 00:15:00,900 Suze: I watched my father 216 00:15:01,770 --> 00:15:07,659 Suze: light that spark within me and within himself as well. 217 00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:12,609 Suze: So now we're gonna fast forward to 1980. 218 00:15:13,239 --> 00:15:15,950 Suze: And all of, you know, the story of what happened 219 00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:18,739 Suze: that I was a waitress for seven years at the 220 00:15:18,750 --> 00:15:21,729 Suze: Buttercup Bakery. And one of the reasons that I loved 221 00:15:21,739 --> 00:15:25,059 Suze: being a waitress for seven years from the age of 222 00:15:25,070 --> 00:15:28,570 Suze: 23 to almost 30 at the Buttercup Bakery is because 223 00:15:28,580 --> 00:15:33,830 Suze: I worked in my father's little tiny Delis and chicken 224 00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:39,530 Suze: shacks waiting on people. And I loved serving people 225 00:15:40,260 --> 00:15:43,789 Suze: and I loved seeing the joy in my father's face 226 00:15:43,799 --> 00:15:45,659 Suze: serving people. 227 00:15:46,719 --> 00:15:51,150 Suze: So I loved being a waitress. I loved being able 228 00:15:51,159 --> 00:15:55,049 Suze: to be a fast order cook. All of that again, 229 00:15:55,270 --> 00:15:57,809 Suze: I learned from my father 230 00:15:58,859 --> 00:16:03,109 Suze: and you know, the story which is I wanted to 231 00:16:03,119 --> 00:16:07,190 Suze: then open up my own restaurant because I watched how 232 00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:10,570 Suze: the Buttercup Bakery grew to be so large on my 233 00:16:10,580 --> 00:16:11,549 Suze: ideas 234 00:16:12,179 --> 00:16:15,609 Suze: and my parents didn't have any money to help me 235 00:16:15,619 --> 00:16:20,030 Suze: start my own restaurant. And the customers at the Buttercup 236 00:16:20,039 --> 00:16:23,900 Suze: Bakery who I served for all those years. They're the 237 00:16:23,909 --> 00:16:27,500 Suze: ones who gave me the money to go and deposit 238 00:16:27,510 --> 00:16:30,669 Suze: it at an account at Merrill Lynch. All the money 239 00:16:30,679 --> 00:16:33,929 Suze: was lost. Three months later, long story, I've told it 240 00:16:33,940 --> 00:16:37,369 Suze: to you before and now I'm hired as an account 241 00:16:37,380 --> 00:16:40,390 Suze: executive at Merrill Lynch. 242 00:16:41,030 --> 00:16:44,159 Suze: Now I get my series seven license 243 00:16:45,190 --> 00:16:53,179 Suze: and now I'm serving people a financial plate of investments 244 00:16:53,190 --> 00:16:54,799 Suze: that would be good for them. 245 00:16:55,669 --> 00:16:59,960 Suze: And I felt like I was a financial waitress and 246 00:16:59,969 --> 00:17:05,400 Suze: I loved it because that spark, that spark that my 247 00:17:05,410 --> 00:17:07,359 Suze: father planted in me 248 00:17:08,380 --> 00:17:12,030 Suze: to do something that I never thought that I would do. 249 00:17:12,040 --> 00:17:15,020 Suze: I only went to work for Merrill Lynch because they 250 00:17:15,030 --> 00:17:17,760 Suze: had lost all the money. At least the crooked broker 251 00:17:17,770 --> 00:17:20,389 Suze: that worked for them did all the money that the 252 00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:23,670 Suze: customers had given me and I wanted to pay them back. 253 00:17:24,260 --> 00:17:26,209 Suze: So I thought the only way I could do that 254 00:17:26,219 --> 00:17:30,209 Suze: was work for Merrill Lynch. And that's when that spark 255 00:17:30,219 --> 00:17:33,319 Suze: that I had put on the shelf years ago that 256 00:17:33,329 --> 00:17:37,150 Suze: was lit by my father came back 257 00:17:38,010 --> 00:17:41,579 Suze: and I felt like I was the luckiest person in 258 00:17:41,589 --> 00:17:46,140 Suze: the world. I loved learning about everything that my father 259 00:17:46,150 --> 00:17:48,449 Suze: was teaching him himself. 260 00:17:50,239 --> 00:17:53,280 Suze: And now I'm starting to make money 261 00:17:54,439 --> 00:18:01,729 Suze: and now I'm making at least $10,000 a month. Sometimes 262 00:18:01,739 --> 00:18:05,329 Suze: I would make more than that. And I was just 263 00:18:05,339 --> 00:18:09,199 Suze: in shock because that was so much money to me. 264 00:18:09,319 --> 00:18:12,409 Suze: I can't even tell you that was so much money 265 00:18:12,420 --> 00:18:16,649 Suze: to my mother and my father. I can't even tell you. 266 00:18:17,489 --> 00:18:23,619 Suze: And then it was March or April of 1981. 267 00:18:24,449 --> 00:18:28,959 Suze: My father now is getting sicker and sicker in and 268 00:18:28,969 --> 00:18:31,300 Suze: out of the hospital all the time. 269 00:18:32,369 --> 00:18:38,229 Suze: And now my brother Gary takes over Maury's Deli because 270 00:18:38,239 --> 00:18:42,660 Suze: my dad can't work anymore. And he made an even 271 00:18:42,670 --> 00:18:46,439 Suze: bigger success out of it and had the money then 272 00:18:46,449 --> 00:18:50,739 Suze: to continue to help my mother so she could continue 273 00:18:50,750 --> 00:18:55,099 Suze: to stay in her apartment and everything else. But now 274 00:18:55,109 --> 00:18:57,239 Suze: Suze is making money 275 00:18:57,920 --> 00:19:02,310 Suze: and I get a call about March or April of 276 00:19:02,319 --> 00:19:03,869 Suze: 1981 277 00:19:04,540 --> 00:19:08,130 Suze: and I'm told I have to get to the hospital. 278 00:19:08,189 --> 00:19:11,609 Suze: My father has been on life support and they're going 279 00:19:11,619 --> 00:19:13,089 Suze: to take him off. 280 00:19:14,040 --> 00:19:16,810 Suze: I get on a plane. I get there, I walk 281 00:19:16,819 --> 00:19:20,280 Suze: in there, everybody's there and they're all waiting now 282 00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:25,540 Suze: because it's the time and we know if we take 283 00:19:25,550 --> 00:19:27,890 Suze: him off of life support 284 00:19:28,750 --> 00:19:30,599 Suze: that he will in fact die 285 00:19:31,430 --> 00:19:33,280 Suze: and they take him off 286 00:19:34,550 --> 00:19:38,319 Suze: an hour goes by, two hours goes by and he 287 00:19:38,329 --> 00:19:44,680 Suze: doesn't die. In fact, two weeks later, he leaves the hospital, 288 00:19:44,689 --> 00:19:49,260 Suze: everybody and my mother takes him home. He's now in 289 00:19:49,270 --> 00:19:52,800 Suze: a wheelchair. He has a nurse at the house with him. 290 00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:56,219 Suze: And I'm like, oh my God, I can't believe it. 291 00:19:56,680 --> 00:20:00,209 Suze: And I go back then to California to Merrill Lynch 292 00:20:00,219 --> 00:20:01,569 Suze: to continue working. 293 00:20:02,750 --> 00:20:06,150 Suze: Now I'm just gonna fast forward here for you for 294 00:20:06,160 --> 00:20:06,800 Suze: a second. 295 00:20:07,500 --> 00:20:10,948 Suze: And it's Father's Day, June 296 00:20:11,839 --> 00:20:18,050 Suze: of 1981 42 years ago. 297 00:20:19,109 --> 00:20:19,718 Suze: And 298 00:20:20,540 --> 00:20:22,349 Suze: I call the house 299 00:20:23,469 --> 00:20:26,010 Suze: and my aunt answers 300 00:20:27,020 --> 00:20:30,339 Suze: and I say Aunty Thelma what's wrong? I can feel 301 00:20:30,349 --> 00:20:31,790 Suze: something's wrong. 302 00:20:32,619 --> 00:20:36,050 Suze: And she says, oh, Suze, we were just gonna call you. 303 00:20:36,119 --> 00:20:38,589 Suze: Your father passed away today. 304 00:20:39,719 --> 00:20:42,229 Suze: And I said he did, how did that happen? 305 00:20:43,010 --> 00:20:46,209 Suze: And she said, well, Suze, it was the strangest thing 306 00:20:46,390 --> 00:20:49,329 Suze: because you see, my aunt and my mother lived in 307 00:20:49,339 --> 00:20:53,609 Suze: the same building. They now had moved to High Park 308 00:20:53,619 --> 00:20:57,119 Suze: in Chicago there and they lived in the same building 309 00:20:57,130 --> 00:21:00,739 Suze: just a few floors apart from each other. So they 310 00:21:00,750 --> 00:21:03,719 Suze: were always together, the family was always together. 311 00:21:04,359 --> 00:21:06,089 Suze: And my aunt said, well, you know, Suze, it was 312 00:21:06,099 --> 00:21:07,530 Suze: a very strange thing. 313 00:21:08,209 --> 00:21:11,109 Suze: We all came up to the apartment and there were 314 00:21:11,119 --> 00:21:13,780 Suze: all these presents for your father 315 00:21:14,709 --> 00:21:19,719 Suze: and he refused to open them. He just refused. We said, 316 00:21:19,729 --> 00:21:23,060 Suze: come on Maury, that was my daddy's name. We called him Nashe. 317 00:21:23,270 --> 00:21:29,629 Suze: But anyway, Maury, come on, open up your presents. He said, no, 318 00:21:29,869 --> 00:21:33,979 Suze: I'm not opening up my presents. Tell me what time 319 00:21:33,989 --> 00:21:35,959 Suze: the boys are supposed to come. 320 00:21:36,650 --> 00:21:39,750 Suze: So my aunt and my mom thought, oh, he doesn't 321 00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:44,609 Suze: want to open up his presents until his sons come. 322 00:21:44,619 --> 00:21:47,219 Suze: I'm still in California. Ok. 323 00:21:48,209 --> 00:21:50,339 Suze: So they tell him 324 00:21:50,979 --> 00:21:53,359 Suze: my brother Gary will be there at such and such 325 00:21:53,369 --> 00:21:55,849 Suze: a time. My other brother will be there at such 326 00:21:55,859 --> 00:21:58,310 Suze: and such a time. And 327 00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:00,369 Suze: he says, fine, 328 00:22:01,170 --> 00:22:03,219 Suze: he then is watching the clock 329 00:22:03,939 --> 00:22:08,729 Suze: and he says to my mother, can you take me 330 00:22:08,739 --> 00:22:15,329 Suze: downstairs in my wheelchair and just wheel me around because 331 00:22:15,339 --> 00:22:18,410 Suze: I want some fresh air. And my mother said, sure, 332 00:22:18,420 --> 00:22:19,689 Suze: no problem. 333 00:22:20,660 --> 00:22:24,639 Suze: Now, my father had been instructed not to get out 334 00:22:24,650 --> 00:22:29,290 Suze: of his wheelchair because his heart was not strong enough 335 00:22:29,300 --> 00:22:33,510 Suze: to hold him walking and he was instructed, do not 336 00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:34,109 Suze: do that. 337 00:22:34,910 --> 00:22:38,119 Suze: And he saw one of my brothers drive up. I 338 00:22:38,130 --> 00:22:41,540 Suze: can't remember which one it was and park and get 339 00:22:41,550 --> 00:22:42,880 Suze: out of the car. 340 00:22:43,699 --> 00:22:48,218 Suze: And now he's walking towards my father and my mother 341 00:22:48,500 --> 00:22:53,750 Suze: and my father gets up out of his wheelchair and 342 00:22:53,760 --> 00:22:59,448 Suze: starts walking with my mother screaming and wheeling the chair 343 00:22:59,459 --> 00:23:03,069 Suze: behind him and he will not stop 344 00:23:03,829 --> 00:23:08,500 Suze: then my other brother drives up and as soon as 345 00:23:08,510 --> 00:23:13,520 Suze: he parked his car and got out, my father collapsed 346 00:23:14,849 --> 00:23:19,880 Suze: and everybody ran to him and he simply said, what 347 00:23:19,890 --> 00:23:24,339 Suze: time is it? They told him and then he died. 348 00:23:25,479 --> 00:23:30,069 Suze: And when my aunt told me that story, I realized 349 00:23:30,079 --> 00:23:32,609 Suze: that the reason that my father 350 00:23:33,430 --> 00:23:38,800 Suze: didn't want to open up his presents was because he 351 00:23:38,810 --> 00:23:44,300 Suze: didn't want the family to waste money on him. Even 352 00:23:44,310 --> 00:23:49,198 Suze: to the day that he died, he was watching every penny. 353 00:23:49,209 --> 00:23:52,459 Suze: He didn't waste any penny. He made the most out 354 00:23:52,469 --> 00:23:53,640 Suze: of every penny 355 00:23:54,599 --> 00:23:58,829 Suze: and he didn't want gifts opened up that he was 356 00:23:58,839 --> 00:24:01,829 Suze: not going to use because he knew what he was 357 00:24:01,839 --> 00:24:02,849 Suze: gonna do that day. 358 00:24:03,979 --> 00:24:07,390 Suze: And that's when I thought again. Oh my God. 359 00:24:08,420 --> 00:24:09,650 Suze: Oh my God. 360 00:24:10,420 --> 00:24:13,270 Suze: Again, I just learned something from my father 361 00:24:14,089 --> 00:24:18,379 Suze: that no matter what you have to make every penny count, 362 00:24:18,530 --> 00:24:22,579 Suze: you can't waste money. You have to be respectful of money. 363 00:24:22,630 --> 00:24:27,369 Suze: You have to honor money in every one of its 364 00:24:27,380 --> 00:24:31,780 Suze: forms and gifts that we buy from one another is 365 00:24:31,790 --> 00:24:35,380 Suze: absolutely a form of money. 366 00:24:36,569 --> 00:24:39,579 Suze: I can go on and on 367 00:24:40,510 --> 00:24:45,729 Suze: and tell you so many stories about my father. One 368 00:24:45,739 --> 00:24:49,560 Suze: of my favorites happens to be in the book, the 369 00:24:49,569 --> 00:24:52,280 Suze: nine steps to financial Freedom. 370 00:24:53,020 --> 00:24:54,669 Suze: And it's in the step 371 00:24:55,359 --> 00:25:00,430 Suze: that everything happens for the best. And I tell the 372 00:25:00,439 --> 00:25:04,030 Suze: story in that book too long to tell here 373 00:25:04,709 --> 00:25:10,439 Suze: as to how my father taught me that lesson. 374 00:25:11,180 --> 00:25:16,099 Suze: So here I sit on Father's Day 42 years later, 375 00:25:16,819 --> 00:25:19,149 Suze: 2023. 376 00:25:19,829 --> 00:25:24,949 Suze: And I think back on the beginning years with my 377 00:25:24,959 --> 00:25:28,250 Suze: father and how angry I was at him and how 378 00:25:28,260 --> 00:25:30,920 Suze: much I disliked him and how much I wanted my 379 00:25:30,930 --> 00:25:33,800 Suze: mother to leave him for all these reasons. 380 00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:38,000 Suze: And I think about all the things that I thought 381 00:25:38,010 --> 00:25:39,599 Suze: he took away from me. 382 00:25:40,229 --> 00:25:44,000 Suze: And in the end, as I go through this story 383 00:25:44,010 --> 00:25:44,680 Suze: with you, 384 00:25:45,670 --> 00:25:50,988 Suze: he gave me so much more than he took from me. 385 00:25:51,709 --> 00:25:54,719 Suze: And in fact, he didn't take anything from me 386 00:25:55,359 --> 00:26:00,550 Suze: because everything happens for the best and everything that has 387 00:26:00,560 --> 00:26:06,540 Suze: happened to me, everything has made me the Suze Orman 388 00:26:06,780 --> 00:26:10,619 Suze: that lives with you via this podcast via my TV 389 00:26:10,630 --> 00:26:14,520 Suze: shows via my books, via my talks via everything I 390 00:26:14,530 --> 00:26:16,010 Suze: have ever done. 391 00:26:17,229 --> 00:26:21,439 Suze: The last thing that my father gave to me really 392 00:26:22,339 --> 00:26:27,709 Suze: was when they told me that I had that tumor 393 00:26:27,719 --> 00:26:28,790 Suze: in my neck. 394 00:26:29,540 --> 00:26:31,149 Suze: And I was told 395 00:26:31,790 --> 00:26:37,500 Suze: approximately three years ago that this operation will either have 396 00:26:37,510 --> 00:26:42,489 Suze: been a life ending surgery, but it will definitely be 397 00:26:42,500 --> 00:26:45,439 Suze: a lifestyle altering surgery. 398 00:26:46,890 --> 00:26:52,140 Suze: And so for these past three years, my father has 399 00:26:52,150 --> 00:26:53,540 Suze: come to play again 400 00:26:54,449 --> 00:26:58,410 Suze: because I remember what he went through. I remember how 401 00:26:58,420 --> 00:27:04,300 Suze: sick he was and nothing was going to stop me. 402 00:27:04,319 --> 00:27:06,400 Suze: And that was the last gift 403 00:27:07,069 --> 00:27:12,050 Suze: that my father gave me to make it through. Really 404 00:27:12,060 --> 00:27:16,579 Suze: a period of time, everybody that I didn't know if 405 00:27:16,589 --> 00:27:18,859 Suze: I was going to be able to really make it 406 00:27:18,869 --> 00:27:22,400 Suze: through and fight it and have the life that I 407 00:27:22,410 --> 00:27:26,589 Suze: have today, which is such a fabulous life. Health wise, 408 00:27:26,599 --> 00:27:28,280 Suze: I can't even tell you 409 00:27:29,209 --> 00:27:32,140 Suze: so miracles can happen. 410 00:27:32,829 --> 00:27:35,159 Suze: Good can come from bad. 411 00:27:36,239 --> 00:27:39,948 Suze: We can put any label on our lives that we want. 412 00:27:40,979 --> 00:27:42,530 Suze: But in the end, 413 00:27:44,479 --> 00:27:49,709 Suze: our parents can offer us something 414 00:27:50,390 --> 00:27:56,689 Suze: that we will absolutely use later on in life. For me. 415 00:27:57,219 --> 00:28:00,159 Suze: That was my father more than my mother. 416 00:28:00,829 --> 00:28:05,489 Suze: That was my father. So Pops, I wish you a very, 417 00:28:05,500 --> 00:28:09,550 Suze: very happy Father's day. And I thank you so much 418 00:28:10,040 --> 00:28:15,839 Suze: for helping me become who I have become in my life. 419 00:28:16,469 --> 00:28:22,640 Suze: Happy Father's Day. Everybody. And remember today, wherever I go, 420 00:28:23,119 --> 00:28:24,760 Suze: I will create 421 00:28:25,569 --> 00:28:30,419 Suze: a more peaceful, joyful and loving world. 422 00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:33,170 Suze: And what a day to do that 423 00:28:33,780 --> 00:28:38,969 Suze: on Father's Day. Because if you do, I promise you, 424 00:28:39,109 --> 00:28:42,949 Suze: you will be unstoppable. 425 00:28:48,959 --> 00:28:49,630 Music: Music (out).